Lost Souls
by tarskeewee
Summary: Todd Manning is a man facing the electric chair, Evangeline Williamson is the attorney struggling to save his life. John McBain is the tortured cop fighting his own demons. All three are tortured souls and through a chain of events their lives will never
1. Chapter 1

Lost Souls 

Chapter 1: Lost Souls

Todd shuffled down the dark gray corridor in a tangerine orange jumpsuit, his hands and feet shackled with a long chain connecting them both, made his approach sluggish. He kept his head down as the guard pulled him along giving everyone the sad impression of him being a lost soul

A man with no home, family or honor to make him feel as if his life was worth saving. She stared at him and her heart broke all over again. He was an innocent man and she would fight for him even if he wouldn't fight for himself.

"Ms. Williamson, we can give you five minutes then he will need to be escorted to the bus transport for his flight."

"Oh I have more time than that warden" she said passing the court order to accompany her client the maximum security prison for his execution. Todd being physically attacked by the inmates while the guards watched gave her the ammunition she needed to get a judges signature. She planned to use every minute on this flight to convince Todd to fight and let her petition for an appeal.

The warden looked over the court order and then back at her. She stood before him confident and determined. Wearing a black wrap dress with matching black knee boots, her three quarter inch coat stopped at the hem of her dress and she wore her hair shiny, parted down the middle, scooped behind her left ear show cased the gleam from her diamond stud. He always thought she should be a runway model as oppose to defender of creeps like this.

"Ms. Williamson, I don't think you understand what you're asking…"

Evangeline looked past him at Todd. His blonde bang hanging over into his face shielded the bruises and despair he wore. "Oh I know what I'm doing, I'm also calling the governors office about the treatment of the prisoners here, I hold you responsible warden for the abuse my client suffered on your watch." She said flashing the warden a challenging smile.

Before Warden Glenn could respond his cell phone buzzed on his hip. "Excuse me.." he said reaching for it, angered by her threat. Evangeline watched holding her briefcase as he took the call. She wanted to get this over with.

"McBain….where are you?" he said frowning.

Evangeline's heart went to her throat. She hadn't spoken to John in days and she sure as hell didn't know he was supposed to be flying with Todd. She thought he was suspended. Confused she listened closely to the Warden.

Warden Glenn looked over to Todd and his guard "Well, that can't be helped. I'll have Pete fly with him. Yes, it's fine. Good luck, sounds like a long night." Attaching the phone back to his hip, the warden called out to the other officer standing off to the left of the room. "Pete, you will be going with Mr. Manning and…" he turned and looked at Evangeline "Ms. Williamson on this one. McBain is a no show."

Evangeline raised an eyebrow confused "John McBain was supposed to be an escort?"

"Yes, but appears there's been some type of major pile up on Hwy 92 because of the snow storm, he won't be making it."

"So he has his badge back" she mumbled looking away. She was happy for him. Maybe this meant that he was actually getting the help that he needed. She hoped so, no matter what she loved him and wanted him whole.

"Well, you need to be going if you're going to fly out before the storm blows in." The warden said walking toward Todd. Evangeline followed him looking at her friend whom she desperately wanted to save. Todd kept his head bowed barely acknowledging their approach. He was digesting the fact that the woman he'd die for, never have the faith in the love they shared. It broke his heart, what was left of it.

"Take them out back to the transport. Make sure he remains shackled at all times. Also make sure Ms. Williamson has everything she needs" he said shooting her a sideways glance that warmed her cheeks. She never got used to the open flirtation of the men in this prison. It was actually quite creepy. Ignoring his sly grin she walked over to Todd.

"Hey, you okay?"

Todd looked up his green eyes dark and distant "Hey you.." he said softly

Evangeline smiled "I'm coming along for the ride."

"Lucky you…" he said smirking, then looked away.

The guard pulled his arm roughly making him stumble backward. He recovered and shuffled along. Evangeline started to follow, but before she did she turned back and looked at the warden. "He's innocent!" she said to smug look he was flashing her.

The warden gave her a crooked smile "Sure he is! Too bad old sparky will fry his ass anyway."

"We'll see about that!" she hissed turning and leave.

The warden watched her breeze out her long hair and open coat flowing behind her. He had to shake his head in wonder at the devotion she showed for her clients, first that Vega looser now this. He wondered how far her passions really flowed and how many men actually had the pleasure of touching that flame. "McBain's an idiot" he chuckled turning to leave.

John got out of the squad car to see one of his officers lighting flares laying them in the street. The snow was falling harder and he pulled his London Fog trench tighter to him walking toward the four car pile up. A firemen approached him, dressed in a tan and reflective yellow uniform with a large helmet. "Lt. McBain"

John stood with his gloved hands in his pockets, staring at the other firemen using the jaws of life to ply what looked to be a teenage Asian girl from the folded up Maxima, jammed under the hood of a black SUV. The snow was falling harder now and he knew this was a bad sign.

"Any casualties?" he asked hoping the girl was okay.

"Yes sir, two so far." The fireman said shaking his head.

"Damn…"

"It's the Noreaster blowing in, this storm is supposed to be the worst this season. I think its going to be a long night"

John nodded "Yeah….a long night" he said with a sullen look on his face. He thought getting his badge back would quell what plagued him. But he felt just as empty inside today as any other. He was just lost.

Evangeline sat in the front of the police van next to the officer, driving her friend and client to meet his fate. She looked back through the gated cover at Todd who was staring off blankly into space, seated next to an officer as well. Todd feeling her eyes on him looked over at her and winked. She smiled weakly then turned back around.

The snow was just starting to fall, watching the crystallized flakes flying past as the sped up the highway, it occurred to her that today was Valentines Day. Last year this time she was sitting in the warmth of Rhodi's, trying to convince the man that she loved that he needed to let her in.

"All is fair in Love…" she mumbled under her breath shaking her head sadly. Oh how things had changed. She now filled the emptiness by helping someone that was even more desperate than she was. It kept her from feeling so lost.

Smiling lightly hearing the song she sang a year ago playing softly in her head she looked out the window at the dark starless sky and wondered where he was. Would he spend the night with Natalie tonight? Sighing she pushed back into the leather of her passenger seat and forced his crooked sly smile with sparkling gemmed eyes from her mind. They weren't lovers and barely friends. She needed to focus on someone that needed her, that's why she was here after all.

Arriving at the landing strip she could see the white Cessna 550 state issued plane with the black wing tips sitting on the tarmac waiting for them. A chill went through her body at the sight of the plane and she looked at it confused by her reaction. She wasn't afraid of flying. Why did she feel a sense of foreboding now? Shaking it off she figured her dread was actually because of Todd. There was a chance that she may not save his life, this could be his last flight.

The officer pulled the van up along side of it and threw it in park. Evangeline grabbed her purse and briefcase sucking in a deep breath before stepping out into the snow. She looked at who she assumed was the pilot standing on the outside of it, dressed in a puffy black jacket with a cap pulled down over the front of his face.

Todd looked up at the snow falling "Are we going to fly in this?" he asked confused.  
Evangeline walked over closer to him. "The news said the blizzard shouldn't be here until tomorrow" she said reaching and touching his back despite the fact that contact between the two of them wasn't allowed.

Todd looked over at her, her head crowned with the fallen snowflakes and smiled. "Why are you here Evangeline?"

"To talk some sense into you of course" she said smiling sassily. He chuckled shaking his head "You don't give up do you?"

"No….and before this flight is over, neither will you!"

The officer came back over "Okay we got clearance let's go" he said to the officer standing next to Todd.

Evangeline nodded following him to the small plane. Stepping up the tiny ladder she climbed in. Todd struggled to get up the steps with his chains. Officer Pete pushed to hurry him along and he finally got up through the hatch making it to the seats across from Evangeline.

The pilot climbed in, pulling up the ladder and closing the hatch. He looked back at his passengers and smiled from under the cape pulled down his face. "It's a two hour flight, boys and girls. There is a bathroom in the back of the plane but you are to remain seated when the seatbelt light is on" he said grinning looking at Todd who he could tell wouldn't be going anywhere.

"Anyway there are drinks over in the side compartment here and here" he pointed for Evangeline. Tipping his cap he went back to the front of the plane.

Evangeline rolled her eyes then looked over to Todd who was on the other side of the officer. "Is it possible I could sit next to him?" she asked

Officer Pete looked at her and frowned "No"

"Look we're going to be 30,000.00 feet in the air with you at our sides. I'm his attorney, I need to speak with him."

"I said NO!" the officer snapped again then leaned back in his chair.

Todd looked over "Don't worry Van, Deputy Doodie here's terrified that we will take over and throw his cranky butt out when he least expects it, ain't that right sheriff?"

"Watch it Manning, not in the mood for your sarcasm and I won't listen to it on this flight!" Pete snapped throwing his arm back and forcing Todd back into his seat with a swift blow to the chest.

Evangeline sucked in her breath shaking her head as she felt the airplane race down the runway. His life did matter and she would prove it.

The nurse for the trauma unit sat at her desk going through her emails. She wasn't allowed books or magazines for the evening shift, so to pass the time so she normally just surfed the internet. Her floor was the wing for the comatose patients; she was position in the middle of the circular desk surrounded by all kinds of monitoring equipment for each room.

Signing onto her soap opera message board she heard a soft ringing chime behind her. Turning around she saw the light blinking for patient in room 453 C. Nurse Bailey stared at it confused. That was Nora Buchanan's room.

John got back in to his car and radioed in the additional officers he would need to deal with the traffic jam on the interstate, the pile up was causing major congestion issues and the storm coming down upon them meant people would be trapped on the highway for hours.

Dispatch Mavis came on taking the information. John sat back in the driver seat listening to her repeat what he said. Once confirmed he signed off and reached to start his car to move it off the road, they needed to clear some of the way. The radio came blaring on.

_  
Hey there lovers, that's right you know what tonight is. It's the night for romance, giving you lovebirds the chance to show the one you love how special they are to you. It's Valentines Night and this is DJ Magic Man on your dial bringing you tunes to make you swoon. So grab that special lady fellas and hold her close this one's for you…. _

All is fair in love…..Love's a crazy game…..Two people vow to stay…..In love as one they say……But all is changed with time……The future no one can see……The road you leave behind……Ahead lies mystery……..But all is fair in love…….I had to go away….A writer takes his pen……To write the words again…..That all in love is fair….

John looked down at the illuminated dials of the radio feeling his heart accelerate. Gripping the steering wheel he saw her face, singing to him a year ago tonight. He'd all but forgot it was Valentines Day.

Now she was out there somewhere, alone thinking he didn't care. Reaching for the dial he turned off the song and freed himself from the desperate need to reach out to her. She was better off wherever she was tonight, away from him.

Evangeline went through the folder on her lap checking out the case's she compiled to try to find a precedent that Todd could use. She'd hadn't found anything in his case to challenge the verdict on. Someone was setting him up and the only person she could think capable of it was dead. "Jesus" she moaned shaking her head.

Leaning back she closed her eyes and rotated her neck from side to side to work out the cramping she was beginning to feel. Suddenly her eyes popped open in shock as the plane dropped at least a 1000 feet. Her stomach leaped into her throat and she let go of the folder gripping both arms of her seat.

Her body shook violently, and she looked up to see everything vibrating as if the turbulence was going tear the airplane apart. Hearing a grinding noise off the right side of the wing, she turned to look out the tiny window next to her. To her horror she saw sparks flying out into the snowing night from the engine under the wing.

"What the hell is going on!" Todd exclaimed.

Evangeline stared in disbelief, the plane's engine looked to be malfunctioning, how on earth could that be? Just then the pilot came on "We're experiencing some difficulties right now and will be turning around to head back to the airp…."

Before he could finished the plane shook again violently and Evangeline's hair was tossed over her face as her body flew forward. If she wasn't wearing a seatbelt she would have been propelled across the plane. The officer on the side of Todd screamed out in shock.

She was too terrified to speak. To afraid to open her eyes, feeling the plane dip as if going into a nose dive. "Oh jesus…" she whimpered letting tears of terror trail down her face.

Todd unable to move his hands much because of the cuffs, looked to his right to see her bent over, her long black hair covering her face blocking it from his view "Evangeline! Put your head between you knees sweetie" he called out wanting to protect her from what he knew could ultimately mean the death of them both.

The plane continued in the nose dive and all of them were tossed forward again as the pressure in the cabin was lost and they struggled to breathe.

"EVANGELINE! Put your head between your knees now!" Todd shouted at her over the loud sound of the malfunctioning engine. Evangeline turned her head to look over at him, and he could see the tears mixed with fright in her eyes, between the long strands blocking her face.

She put her head between her knees and the officer undid his seatbelt. "Fuck this!" he snapped rushing to the cockpit, being tossed to the left and right as the plane still shook spinning downward. He had to find out what was going on.

To his horror the last turbulent drop caused the pilot to hit his head, knocking him out. Officer Pete ran to the front, grabbing the steering wheel to pull the plane back up from the nose dive.

The pilot's heavy unconscious body was bent over the controls making it difficult to maneuver. Pete could see they were headed directly into Lantana Mountain. Pulling the pilot loose of his constraints he climbed in and pulled the steering gear upward. The plane struggling began to come up some, but not enough and Pete screamed as he saw that they were headed into a dense forested side of the mountain.

Evangeline heard Pete's screams and began to cry. She heard Todd calling out to her but all she could do was pray. She was going to die, the realization of that made her paralyzed with fear. Todd knelt over trying to brace himself for impact, he asked god that he spare her, she didn't deserve to die because she wanted to help him.

The plane crashed through large redwood trees breaking off both wings. Both Todd and Evangeline were hurled back into their seats as a loud thunderous boom alerted them that the undercarriage of the plane was being pealed away.

Evangeline was tossed violently from side to side and she opened her eyes to see the seat in front of her ripping off, as the right side of the plane imploded with the long branches of a large trees crashing through sending sparks, debris and snow flying all around her. Her hair blowing back away from her face, revealed the sure terror of the moment. Screaming as loud as she could, something she didn't see clearly now airborne in the plane, smacked her on the side of her head forcing her into darkness. She blacked out immediately.

Nurse Bailey rushed down the hall to hear screams from a patient that barely moved in over five months. Coming to the room she pushed the door open to see Nora sitting up screaming to the top of her lungs.

Shocked by the sight of her she stood there frozen at first, not sure what she was witnessing. Nora screaming started to snatch out the tubes in her arms and head. The nurse fearing she would hurt herself found her legs and rushed inside trying to restrain her, as two other orderlies came rushing in.

"It's okay…calm down, you're safe!"  
"No!" Nora screamed crying out loudly in a hoarse voice. Her auburn hair now longer to her shoulder flew wildly around her face.

The nurse forced her back down to the bed "It's okay really….please, calm down!" she looked up at a nurse who appeared in the door. "Page Dr. Miller, now!" she shouted at her.

Nora fought them trying to get loose. "No! Evangeline! You have to help her! Oh god Evangeline!" she shouted.

The nurse looked at her confused not understanding what she meant. Nora screams turned to whimpers as she squirmed crying, while the orderlies tied her down to the bed for her own protection. She opened her eyes and they immediately rolled into her head as her body convulsed into seizures. Dr. Truman and Miller ran into the room.

Paige barked off an order of a dosage to combat the seizure to a nurse nearby who ran out to get it. Nora's body stiffened and shook violently under her seizure and Dr Truman tilted her head back inserting a cotton bit into her mouth to keep her from biting down on her tongue. The nurse returned within seconds passing Dr. Miller the requested dosage in a syringe.

"Get the restraints off her and roll her over to her side" Paige snapped after plunging the syringe into Nora's veins.

The two orderlies did as she instructed and Nora violent shakes began to subside. Nurse Bailey wiped the sweat from her brow exhausted by the episode. Dr. Truman looked at her confused. "What happened?"

"She woke up!"

Dr. Miller gasped at the implication "She what?"

"I'm telling you she sat up in bed and screamed. Said something about save Evangeline, before the seizure. I swear."

Paige looked at Nora who was sweating breathing shallowly with her eyes closed from the medicine. "Dear god…she woke up?"

Todd opened his eyes to the smell of sulfur and the screams of the officer that guarded him earlier now trapped in the cockpit. Todd was thrown in his seat to the back of the plane still strapped down but lying on his side. The roof of the plane was half off and snow was falling inside.

"Evangeline!" he called out, unable to see clearly from the blood running into his eyes. He had a pain above his brow indicating he must be cut. "Evangeline!"

"Help Me!" the officer up front screamed, in response to Todd's yelling for her.

Todd reached for the lock on his seatbelt struggling to push the button to free him. He didn't hear or see her and his panic had his hands shaking. Finding the release finally he undid it letting out a sigh of relief. "Evangeline!" he called out again desperate to make sense of all the wreckage around him.

He scanned the over turned passenger seats and blocks of plane now covered in show from the storm falling inside the gaping holes in the plane. He didn't see her anywhere. Where the hell was she?

Falling over to his side still shackled between his hands and feet he coughed as the pungent order of sulfur and smoke filled his lungs. His eyes began to burn with tears as the black smoke assaulted his senses. He began to inch across the floor staying low, searching everything he passed. "Evangeline, baby say something" he moaned

Straining he looked forward to see the heel of a black boot, sticking out awkwardly from underneath two overturned seats.

It was her leg and the only thing he could see from the debris she was buried under. "Sweet Jesus no! EVANGELINE!" he screamed crawling desperate to get to her.

"Lt. McBain…" The fireman called out walking toward John in the snow who was helping the other officers get the cars past the accident.

John turned and looked at him. "What is it?"

"LPD on the radio sir, they need to speak to you."

John nodded turning on his heel going to his squad car. Opening the door he got inside with his legs still hanging out of the door into the snow.

"McBain here over…."

"Lt, the commissioner needs you here immediately…over"

John frowned "Got a situation here, tell Bo I…"

"John, its Bo. Get back to the station now! That's an order. We…we ummm got a situation"

John frowned "What's going on Bo?"

"Just get here…over!"

John hung up. Dr. C had been busting his chops and Bo was allowing it. Now they were pulling him back in. He was sick to death of the games this damn doctor played with his life. "Damn!" he grimaced climbing into his squad car all the way and closing the door. Starting it he sped up the emergency exit, driving past the accident. Swiftly and expertly on the icy road he made a u-turn flashing his lights, as he crossed over the snowy medium jumping in traffic that flowed in the opposite direction.

"This better be damn good!" he mumbled!

written by tarskeewee08

Back to Index

Chapter 2: Lost Souls 

Bo paced the bull pen of the police station his heart racing and his palms sweating. When the call came in from the tower that the transport plane had let out a may day call and then went silent his heart sank. This would crush Evangeline for some reason she still thought that Todd was innocent and learning that his plane had been in trouble would crush her. Then the other call came in about who all was on the plane. As soon as he heard her name his face became drenched in sweat and he was sure his face was flushed.

"How the hell did she end up on the plane?" Bo mumbled as he walked back and forth waiting for John to arrive. There was no way he could tell him this over the police radio he would have flipped. Getting him into the office was the best place to break this to him.

Bo saw the other officers milling around mumbling something about the supposed plane crash and he put his hands on his hips. Looking up he heard the click of John's shoes on the hard linoleum floor.

John walked up to Bo shaking the snow from his hair and pulling his jacket off. Bo stared him dead in the eyes, afraid how he was going to tell his friend and his best cop regardless of him being on suspension that Evangeline was on a plane with Manning that went down.

John saw the other officers staring at him with sad expressions on their faces and shaking their heads as they walked past him. One officer even reached out and touched John on the shoulder but didn't speak. Walking up he saw Bo pacing back and forth in front of his office white as a ghost and sweating bullets. This was serious he knew from the expression on his face, this was deadly serious.

Todd's tears and the trickle of blood clouded his vision as he crawled on hands and knees toward her leg. She couldn't be dead, not like this all because she believed in him. Screaming her name over and over again over the loud pops and crackles of the debris from the plane Todd made his way to her. Looking at the over turned seat and down at his hands and legs still shackled he had to get out of these damn handcuffs if he was going to save her. "I'll be right back, don't you die on me!" he yelled as he crawled closer to the cockpit.

Hearing Pete yell and scream for help Todd pushed himself up onto his legs and shuffled closer to the cockpit door. The snow and wind whipped threw him as the front of the plane was gone as well and they were teetering over the side of the cliff. He looked down to see Officer Pete pinned under the co pilot seat.

Todd careful not to rock the plane and send them all over the edge moved closer to Pete and knelt down wiping his hair from his eyes. He looked down at Pete and stared at the officer that not only gave him shit but Evangeline shit as well.

Pete was on his back with the seat crushing his legs. Todd looked down and saw Pete struggling to push the seat from off of him. His right broken in a compound fracture the bone jutting out from the skin caused Todd to wince at the site. He shuffled forward and leaned over sticking his hand under the seat. "Help me…" Pete cried.

"Shut up!" Todd hissed.  
"HELP ME MANNING!" Pete yelled in his ear.  
"Evangeline first." He said narrowing his eyes on the guard as he felt for his keys.  
"What are you doing!"  
"I need your keys." Todd hissed.  
"Let me up Manning."  
"The keys were are the damn keys." Todd said ignoring the officer's cries. Hearing the soft jingle of the keys Todd unhooked them from Pete's belt and fell back on the floor out of breath.

The plane rocked back and forth and slid a few feet down the cliff. Bracing himself on the sides of the cock pits walls Todd held his breath praying that the plane would stop moving, just long enough for him to get back to her. Pete screamed as the plane slid, "Shut up! You're going to kill us!" Todd yelled.  
"Listen, I'll let you go if you save me."  
Todd looked at him and then back at Evangeline. Shaking his head he fingered the keys and slid them into the lock of the hand cuffs.

He looked back as he tried desperately to free himself so he could then free Evangeline. Hearing the plane creak and wobble again he unshackled himself throwing the keys to the ground and stood up slowly. He walked back holding the sides of the plane as he moved back to Evangeline's side. Wiping his eyes from the tears of the sulfur Todd pushed at the seat that pinned her to the bottom of the plane. It wouldn't budge. Closing his eyes and pushing with all he could he freed the seat that rested on top of her.

Todd looked down at her limp body still seat belted to her seat he fell to the floor of the plan sticking his hand under her to try and free her. Breathing harder than he thought possible the blood now falling faster down his eyes and the smell of sulfur even stronger he had to get them out before the plane either blew up or they fell over steep cliff.

Sitting down on the ground Todd rolled onto his stomach as he shoved his hand under her seat feeling for the seat belt. He could barely feel her chest rising and falling and he knew she was in even more trouble than he first thought.

Seeing Dr. Crosby walk around the corner John rolled his eyes he knew this was about IA. But why in the hell would Bo pull him of a huge pile up on the highway for more IA crap? "In my office John." Bo said softly as he stood holding the door open for him. John nodded at Bo pushing his hair out of his face as Dr. Crosby followed him in.

Looking over his shoulder at Dr. Crosby John blew out a heated breath, "What is this about Bo? I was in the middle of handling a multi car accident. Don't tell me that fool made you call me in." He snarled cutting his eyes at Dr. Crosby.

Bo shook his head hanging it low as he crossed in front of John and Dr. Crosby, "We had a more important incident John."  
"What?" he said clearly irritated.  
"The transport plane that Todd was on, air traffic control lost radio contact with it."  
Running his fingers threw his hair he looked at Bo shaking his head, "He was on his way to die Bo, so what's the big deal?"

John saw Dr. Crosby take a step forward as Bo opened his mouth to speak again, "Someone else was on the plane and went with Todd."  
"Who?" he asked clearly agitated.  
"Evangeline."

John stared at Bo wide eyed. He thought he just said that Evangeline was on the transport with Todd. But why would she do that, she had no reason to be on the plane. She was supposed to be at home safe and sound. Todd didn't want to appeal, what the hell was she doing on the plane. His head spinning as he heard Bo's voice a distant sound saying his name over and over again. His stomach dropped and his heart raced as he began to sweat profusely. "No she wasn't…" he chocked out.

"John listen she was on the plane, she got a court order to accompany Manning on the flight."  
He didn't hear anything that Bo was saying. Fishing in his pocket for his cell phone John hit the speed dial calling her cell phone, it went straight to her voicemail. Calling her house her answering machine picked up. Calling her office her voicemail answered. The sweat dripped down his face into his eyes as his heart pounded so hard in his ears he couldn't hear anything anyone was saying. All he knew was that she wasn't on that plane, she couldn't be on that plane.

Looking up at Bo he rushed him slamming Bo down on to the desk in a fit of rage. His eyes welling with tears he grabbed roughly at Bo's collar glaring down at him, "Why are you lying to me!" He hissed his face turning beet red.

He felt his arms being pried from around Bo's neck as two officers rushed into the office pulling John away. He panted heavily as his hands shook with fear and desperation. Bo stood up coughing and pulling at his collar as he waved the guards off. John fell back against the wall his hair hanging down in his eyes his head was swimming with the idea that she was gone, lost to him and he never got to tell her the truth, the truth of how he really felt.

Todd clenched his jaw as he ripped at the seatbelt finally freeing her. Her body fell limp to the bottom of the plane. He wiped his brow getting blood on the back of his hand as he reached for her arm. Pulling her free of the seat Todd fell to the side completely out of breath. Her head turned to look at him she was still unconscious and he could see a trickle of blood trailing down the side of her face. Todd lowered his face to hers to check for her breathing. She wasn't… "The hell you don't!" Todd yelled as he turned her body over.

Pushing her hair out of her face he pinched her nose as he tilted her head back and administered a few quick breathes into her lungs. They rose and fell with each breath but she still wasn't breathing on her own. Doing it again and again until he heard her cough and then pass out again Todd fell back relieved that she was at least breathing even if she was still unconscious. He looked around at the carnage of the plane and then felt the plane slide from under him.

All the seats that weren't still attached to the bottom of the plane went sliding forward as he reached for Evangeline and a seat that was still attached to the ground of the plane. Pulling her under him Todd felt the plane stop moving. He stood up and scooped her up into his arms and hobbled out of the plane as it moved and wiggled beneath him.

Dropping to his knees he held her limp body in his arms as the plane creaked and slide down the side of the cliff. The loud explosion and shock wave from the plane tumbling down the side of the cliff busted in to flames knocked Todd forward causing him to drop Evangeline's unconscious body.

Falling over her into the snow covered mountain his body lying vertically over hers. Todd looked over at her face her hair sticking to her face from the blood and her breathing shallow, he was grateful that she was till breathing. Todd wiped the snow from her face and scooped her up again as he stumbled away from the reminder of the wreckage. He walked as far as he could the snow blowing hard against his face and through his hair as he struggled to carry her threw the snow and wind.

She wasn't heavy in the least but since she was unconscious she was dead body weight and the cold caused his heart to pump fiercely as he stumbled threw the forest. Pushing past trees that wiped at him leaving small slash marks on his face. His chest was on fire from the cold air that filled his lungs as he moved slowly through the forest. Dropping to his knees out of breath from carrying the both of them both up the side of the mountain Todd prayed that there was someone looking for the both of them, he didn't care who the hell it was he just wanted to make sure she was okay.

Reaching down and touching her face tenderly he pushed the blood covered hair out of her face and then grunted as he stood back up and trudged up the side of the mountain. There had to be a cabin some where around here.

John sat in the chair in Bo's office his head in his hands stifling the tears that he wanted to spill and the blood curdling scream he had wanted to release since Bo said those horrific words to him. Evangeline was on the plane, Evangeline was on the plane with Manning when it went down. That was all he could think about.

Her face flashed in his mind as he saw her crying and screaming as the plane slammed into the side of the mountain or worst burst into flames. He shut his eyes tight trying to force the image away as well as the need to throw up as he felt a hand on his shoulder. Looking up pale as a ghost he stared at Dr. Crosby. "What…" he cracked out his voice hoarse with regret, guilt for not making the flight, with pain for losing her.

"Are you okay?"  
John forced a self deprecating grin as he stared at Dr. Crosby in his eyes, "You're going to stand there and ask me if I'm alright?" he seethed threw a clenched jaw.  
"John I know how much…"

John rose from his seat with force shocking Dr. Crosby as he stumbled backwards against Bo's filing cabinet, "You know nothing about me you know nothing about her. So don't you dare stand there and tell me that you know how I feel." He forced out threw his clenched jaw.  
"I was just trying to help…"  
"What and tell me the woman that I…" he stopped speaking looking away as he ran a hand through is hair and back down his face. He stuck his hands in his pockets and stormed out of the office.

Running smack in to Natalie he looked down at her, "Hey John what's up!" she said smiling brightly at him.  
"I can't talk." He hissed pushing past her. Natalie reached out and grabbed his arm, "What's going on with you." She said flipping her hair.  
"Let go of me!" he snapped shaking her free.  
"John wait!" She called after him. Natalie felt someone grab her from behind stopping her retreat after John and turned around to stare at Dr. Crosby, "What do you want!" she snapped.

"Let him be." He said letting go of her shoulder.  
"Don't tell me what to do." She hissed pushing away from him.  
"Natalie!" Dr. Crosby called after her.  
"What!" she said turning around with face scrunched up rolling her eyes.  
"Todd's plane went down."  
"Soo…." She said rolling her neck.  
"Evangeline was on the plane." He said softly.

Natalie turned her back as a small smile crept across her lips and she walked after John. Picking up her pace she came around the corner to see John and her Uncle Bo standing in the hallway talking. Bo had his hand on John's shoulder and John's head was down as he stared at his shoes.

"I need to find her Bo."  
"They don't even know where the plane went down John. They lost radio contact with them."  
"I don't care if they lost radio contact with the plane I have to find her!" he snapped.  
"I can't have you out there looking for her John, you aren't apart of the department any more." Bo said sadly.

John looked up at Bo with heat in his eyes, "You've got to be kidding me Bo! She's out there alone, scared, cold, and probably hurt and you're asking me to sit here and do nothing!"  
"No I'm telling you that you can't be in the search for either of them John. I'm sorry." Bo patted John on the back as he walked away.

Punching the wall in front of him hard John lowered his hand not caring that his knuckles were scratched and bleeding. Grabbing his chest he fell against the wall as his heart slowly broke into pieces again. He had to find her and no one and nothing would stop him.

Natalie smiled softly at Bo as he passed her and walked over to John. "John, I heard…" she said softly touching his face.  
He pushed her hand away sick of people's sympathy he didn't understand why no one was out looking for her. "I don't need your sympathy Natalie I need to find Evangeline."  
"Well what did Uncle Bo say?"  
"That I can't help."  
"He's right you should let the other guys find the plane. I don't want you to see that stuff and all the wreckage of the plane."  
"She's not dead!" He snapped walking away from her.  
Natalie watched as John walked away from her for a second time her bottom lip quivering as she tried to hold back the tears. Why was he being so mean to her, what was it about her!

Exhausted from his trek Todd rested against a strong tree sliding down it. The longer they stayed outside in the snow and the longer she stayed unconscious the more he worried about her. His orange jump suit drenched from his sweat and the snow he shook her trying to wake her up, "Evangeline…" he said softly. "Evangeline I need you to wake up, I don't know if I can carry you the rest of the way." He said panting.

"Please Evangeline, I need you to wake up!" he said desperately. Todd looked up in the sky hoping to see a helicopter flying over head or something. The density of the trees and the heavy snow fall prevented him from seeing anything. Shit if he couldn't see anything then no one could see them either. He needed to find a cabin and now. Her body was shivering trying to warm it's self and so was his.

Finding the strength deep down in side Todd climbed to his feet and continued his trek. The snow blowing around him he was afraid he would get lost or turned around and end up heading in the wrong direction. All he could do was pray that someone was watching out for them and get them some place safe and sound.

Ready to give up and just let the mountain take them Todd looked up and saw the outline of something hidden behind some trees. A surge of adrenaline pushed him through the woods and he stumbled across the most amazing sight that he ever laid his eyes on.

"Someone's looking out for us Evangeline." He said staring down at her. Todd stumbled to the door kicking it a few times he almost fell backwards as the wood door flew in. He looked into the dark house and set Evangeline down on the ground and went back to the door. Falling against it he reached for a chair to keep the door shut and the wind and snow from blowing into the small cabin.

His chest was burning and his face was blistered from the intense snow storm not to mention his head was pounding from the head wound he had. Walking over to her Todd collapsed next to her out of sheer exhaustion.

By: Oltlfantimes10

Back to Index

Chapter 3: Lost Souls 

"He's a loose cannon.." Dr. Crosby said pacing Bo's office, his hands shoved down in his pockets.

"Cut him some slack, the man very well may have lost the woman he loves…." Bo said sitting down sighing. He wanted John on this detail; John was the most driven committed cop he had. But how could he use him, when it was Evangeline that was missing? John was a walking time bomb and since the prison riot he's been barely been able to keep it together. Refusing therapy and growing increasingly combative, he just didn't know what this latest tragedy would do to him.

"I understand that Bo, which is why you can't let him anywhere near this one. His compulsive personality will make him take this on as his own private search and rescue mission. If he fails at finding her, or worse she's found dead it'll finally do him in."

Bo felt as if his head would explode from the pressure rising in his temples. Sucking in his breath he massaged his temples and thought of Evangeline. He always liked her and right now he felt John's pain. She didn't deserve this. Hearing his phone ring next to him he jumped and Dr. Crosby stopped to look at the ringing phone. Bo stomach dropped as reached for it with a shaky hand. It was probably word on where the plane went down, if they got any type of signal from the little black box.

"Bo Buchanan here…."  
"Bo its Paige…."  
Sitting up in his chair he smiled faintly. He was a drowning man, hearing her voice was the lifeline he needed. "Hey you…"

Paige moved around the nurse's desk with the long cord to the phone preventing her from going further, to get out ear shot of Spencer. She hated being anywhere near him knowing now that he killed two people and what he forced her to do. "Bo, its Nora…"

"What's wrong with Nora?" Bo asked quickly brow creasing into a serious frown. It's been months and there was no change in her condition. He prayed for a change, but nothing happened. The news that their might be something going on with her had him on the edge of his seat.

"She's coming out of the coma and I think you need to get here"

"I'm on my way" he said slamming the phone down before she could say more.

Dr. Crosby looked at Bo confused "What's going on Commissioner…"

"I have to go to the hospital…" He said rising putting on his jacket. Dr. Crosby watched him trying to make sense of the urgency. Bo saw him staring at him expecting further clarification. "My ex wife just came out of her coma."

"Oh, okay…well that's great news. "

"Yeah, I'll have my cell on, call me when we hear from the FAA…" he said barely hearing his response as he raced out of his office. He couldn't believe it, she was awake. He had to get to her side now.

Todd shivered as the cold gripped him shaking him back awake. Rolling over he felt the numbing pain of his bruised forehead. His body ached and hands felt numb, the exposure for that time in the snow coupled by the cold floor he lay on made it painful to breathe let alone open his eyes. Moaning he licked his chapped lips turning his head painfully slow to look at her.

She lay next to him, her head turned away and her hair fanned out behind her. Even from his reclined position he could see the bruise on her forehead. Rolling over his side he lifted himself painfully up on his bent arm to peer down on her. She looked like a princess, a fallen princess, but a princess all the same. Trying to stop his teeth from chattering he reached for her chin and turned her face slowly to his.

"Evangeline..." he croaked out afraid over how long she'd been out, especially since she stopped breathing earlier.

She didn't stir and Todd feared that she was again seriously wounded internally, somewhere he couldn't see. Lowering his face to hers he felt her breath on his cheek. "Thank god..." he sighed.

Sitting up he surveyed the cabin. It became immediately clear that this was no cabin at all. It was a Rangers Station; one of many posted around the mountain to police poaching and maintain some type of police control for hikers and campers around these parks.

He glanced behind him to see a full-size cot with a thin mattress covered in a grayish worn looking blanket. It was pushed up against the left corner of the small cabin and being wet from the snow, shivering through icy coldness of the cabin, it appeared heavenly.

Scooping her up into his arms, his body still weak from the trek up to this place he struggled to get his bearings as he stood. She remained limp in his arms, her head hanging back causing her hair to sweep downward.

He carried her over to the cot, laying her carefully on it. Immediately he grabbed the extra blanket on top and covered her with it trying to warm her. She was wearing a black wrap dressed the clung to her body which was wet from the melted snow. Moving the wet long strands from her face he tapped her cheek lightly.

"Evangeline, you're going to have come out of it, I need to know if you're hurt" he said softly. His coaxing at first having no affect left him feeling more desperate. Breathing his icy breath out he blew into his hands to heat them, then reached to her face and tried to warm her cheeks. Tapping her face again hoping she'd respond, he was shocked when he witnessed her suck in a deep breath and then let go through her nostrils. He saw her chest heave under the blanket and he wanted to cry out for the wonderful sight. She was going to be okay. Evangeline attempted to turn her head, her eyes remaining close as she did.

"Hey you okay?" he asked stroking her cheek.

Evangeline moaned in a low voice, then began to cough up the smoke she still carried in her lungs from the crash. Todd watched her closely relieved to hear anything escaping her.

Slowly her heavy lids raised, focusing on his wounded face with old and new bruises staring down into hers. "What…"

"Are you okay?" he asked for the hundredth time feeling a greater since of relief wash over him.

Trying to lift her right arm a searing pain cut through the joint of her wrist making her cry out in agony. The pain excruciating now brought tears to her eyes. "Oh god!" she gasped trying to wait through the agony she was experiencing. He looked down at her swollen wrist she cradled with her free hand above the blanket. Reaching for it she moved it quickly away. "It hurts" she whimpered.

"It looks broken, or sprung…any thing else hurt?"  
Evangeline swallowed and nodded but a sharp pain shot through her temples when she moved her head kept her from speaking. Letting go of a deep sigh he opened her eyes again and looked at him. "My foot it hurts really bad…." She said in a low strained voice.

Todd looked down at the end of the bed. Pulling the blanket from over her he saw the black stiletto knee boots she wore. "Which one?"

"The left" she said sucking in more air and trying to regulate her breathing. So much was hurting right now she was growing numb to it all. Todd slid his hand under her leg gently lifting it and causing her dress to fall back revealing more of her thighs.

He fingered the zipper on the side of the boot and gently slid it down. As he neared her ankle he heard her cry out. "Wait….wait Todd..don't it hurts, please!" she said trying to lift up, bracing herself with her good hand. The pain on the side of her head throbbed and she blinked away more tears.

Todd looked back at her. "Stay still Van, your ankle is swelling we have to get this boot off."

Evangeline began to shiver, the cabin was as cold as it was outside. She didn't understand why she was wet. "I….I….I'm cold" she said her teeth chattering.

Todd realized he needed to hurry so he could warm her. Throwing the blanket back over the top of her, he looked around the cabin at the shelves and boxes for something additional to cover her with. She was lying on top of a blanket but he didn't want to pull that free since it was covering the mattress. Moving back from the cot he looked under the bed to see a large metal chest. Todd pulled it out further to inspect it, immediately noticing the metal lock hanging from it. "I swear we can't win!" he grunted.

Evangeline breathing shallowly through her pain looked over at him. "What is it?"

"First thing, first we need to get this boot off." He said going back to the zipper. "Listen to me, its going to hurt."

"No, Todd don't!" she moaned trying to move back up against the bed.

"Evangeline, come on sweetie we have to do this. If I do it quick it saves you a lot of pain in the end. Let me try okay"

Evangeline wanted to be brave but struggled with idea of more pain on top of the constant throbbing in her ankle. "Okay…" she said weakly.

Todd yanked the zipper down and she grunted but didn't holler or give into what he imagined had to be torturous. Pealing back the flap of her leather boot he saw her ankle bulging inside. She wore black knee high socks underneath, making it difficult to see any discoloring, bruising or cuts to clue him in to how badly she was hurt.

Looking back at her he saw her large almond shaped eyes glistening with fear. She seemed on this rare occasion vulnerable, helping her is something he needed to do. He was desperate for redemption since the world deemed him unredeemable. "You're doing great princess…" he said loving her strength.

Evangeline smiled weakly at him. "Is it broke?"

"I don't know yet. I'm going to remove it now, you ready?"

Evangeline looked at him in the dark cabin. "I think so…"

"On the count of three" he said grabbing the heel and pointy tip of her boot.

"One..two…three!" he yelled snatching it off. Evangeline let go a loud scream that echoed through the small cabin. She burst into tears from the pain and he looked back at her alarmed. Tossing the boot he went to her, climbing on bed behind her, he pulled her into his lap as she cried even louder. "Its okay…its okay princess it's over." he said stroking her hair that was now flat to her head.

She reached for him clinging tightly, Todd continue to hold her bracing his back against the wall of the cabin pulling her more into his lap. He listened to her sobs as she buried her face in his chest. He knew that her tears weren't from the pain of her wounded foot. She was scared, they came really close to dying and the trauma of it all was coming down on her at once. Kissing the top of her head he held her and let her cry. "Let it go, you're safe now. I'll protect you don't worry."

John pounded on the door ready to break it in. "Antonio open up!" he screamed

Christian flung the door open enraged by the intrusion. Luckily Jamie was with RJ for the night and she didn't have to witness it. "Are you crazy!" he snapped glaring at John who still had snow on the shoulders of his coat.

John pushed past him "Antonio!" he shouted going through the apartment. He first went to Llanfair in search of him, and was told he wasn't there. He tried calling but got no answer. He was desperate now and his fear, guilt and grief had him behaving like a maniac.

Christian slammed the door "What the hell is wrong with you! Stop yelling!"

Turning on him John glared, his eyes swollen from crying while driving through the storm to get there. "Don't you tell me what to do!" he yell at Christian clenching his fist ready to swing, desperate to take it out on someone, anyone.

Antonio came out of his back room. "John!"

John stopped whirling around relieved to see Antonio. He was his only hope of finding her and finding her soon. Antonio looked him up and down "What the hell is going on?"

"McBain was about to make a move, a foolish one!" Christian said challengingly wanting to finish what John was about to start..

John chose to ignore him. "You have to help me bro…" he said swiping at his hair wet from snow and sweat.

"Help you with what?" Christian said irritated. He didn't understand why his brother could even remain friends with him. He barely had two words of either of them unless it was too brood or make some snarky comment. Now he shows up in the middle of the night wanting help. "Bro let me toss him out!" Chris said taking a step toward John.

"Chris….back off!" Antonio said throwing up his hand. "John calm down, tell me what's going on."

John nodded opening his mouth and feeling his throat closing on him at the same time, as he struggled to swallow the bile rising up, threatening to make him expel his lunch. If she died he wouldn't survive it, not her, he just couldn't lose her it would be worse than loosing Caitlyn.

Antonio stared at him confused as he watched his face go from pale to green "Hey you okay?"

Christian looked him up and down seeing him sway as if he would collapse. John blinked several times before racing past them both to the bathroom, making it just in time before the contents of his stomach exploded out of him mouth. Antonio and Christian stood in the living room completely dumb founded. They'd never seen him loose control like this.

John flushed the toilet and then went to the sink turning on the water. Splashing water on his face and rinsing his mouth out he burst into tears. He was loosing control. God help him, he had to find the strength, just enough to make it through. She needed him.

Antonio came to the bathroom and looked inside. "John…it's time to start talking brother, you are really worrying me. What has you so damn spooked?" he asked alarmed.

John rose shakily and looked up at him in the mirror. "Its Evangeline, she was on the plane to transport Todd Manning this evening, it went down in the storm near the mountain."

Christian hearing the tale came charging toward the bathroom "Evangeline was in a plane crash!" he asked alarmed feeling his chest tighten.

John turned around facing them both, wiping his hand across his face, he struggled with the war that raged inside of him. Loosing control was not an option. "Yes, she was in a plane crash and if you two don't help me, she may die" he said his words rocking both men to the core.

Bo stepped off the elevator looking from left to right. He saw Paige in the hall talking to a nurse. Seeing her was a relief, he was so tightly wound up over the news that Nora was awake. "Paige!"

She turned to look at him "Bo" she said moving into his arms, hugging him tightly. "She's up now…"  
"Is she okay….I mean is she conscious and aware?"  
"She's awake, we're running tests. The nurse that found her initially said she spoke but she hasn't since."  
"Can I see her?"  
"Come with me" she said grabbing his hand, leading him to her. Bo walked with her down the hall. He had hoped since her collapse she would come back. The pain he felt for the stress he caused her up until her meltdown haunted him constantly. He could still remember her cries and pleas as she came undone.

Walking through the door he looked to see her lying on the bed staring blankly in space. Her auburn hair now longer she looked as she did ten years ago, he stopped at the sight of her searching for his voice. Paige came in behind him rubbing his back. "She's been like this since she woke up. We should have to results of her MRI soon."

Bo walked to the bed "Nora…its me"  
Nora turned and looked at him. She focused her eyes on him and Paige stared in disbelief as she saw the unmistakable recognition in her eyes. "Bo…" she croaked out.

Bo moved at first cautiously then quickly to her bed, instinctively pulling her in his arms "Nora, thank god. Thank god!" he said cradling her head to his chest.

Lifting her arms she hugged him back. "Bo…." Is all she could say through a voice that struggled to be heard after being silent for so many months?

Paige watched and though it warmed her heart to see them reunite she had to swallow on the sense on envy at the love she watched them express. Bo cupped Nora's face and kissed both her eyes "We thought we lost you" he said softly.

"Bo…Eva…Evangee…Evangeline" she croaked out.

Bo frowned at her "What?"

"Find…Evangeline" she said her eyes tearing.

Bo looked back at Paige. "Did you tell her about the crash? Why would you do that?"

Paige shook her head "I didn't….she hasn't spoken to us. The nurse said she woke up screaming Evangeline's name. What crash?"

Bo looked back at Nora who had tears running down her face "I don't understand., how else would you know?"

Todd held Evangeline as her tears finally ceased and morphed into soft whimpering. He had to get her warm and tend to her ankle and wrist. "Evangeline, Can you sit up for me"

Nodding she sat up from his lap with his help, he eased off the bed with her, positioning her up against the wall. Pulling the blankets from underneath her he quickly covered her with them. Evangeline watched as he went and dragged the large metal chest from under the bed. Looking down at her wrist she saw it was turning purple. "Todd, what happened to us? What is this place?"

Todd looked up his blonde hair in his face blood still on his forehead "We crashed and the plane exploded, I had to find us shelter. I think this is a Ranger Station."

Evangeline looked around "Have you found a radio?"

"Not yet princess, working on it. First we need to get a medical kit" he said walking over to the desk and pulling open the drawers. Finding paper, pens and an assortment of office supplies he grew frustrated. Pulling out the large bottom drawer he dumped it's contents on the desk spilling them everywhere.

Evangeline watched him rummage through things, trying to steady her vision which kept blurring from her head injury. She figured she had a concussion from the painful headache that plagued her since she woke. "Todd, the pilot, the guard….where are they?"

"Dead"  
"What?"  
"Dead…we are the only survivors."

"Oh god…" she moaned. Closing her eyes she shook her head "What are we going to do?"

Todd finding a set of keys smiled. He went to the chest and fell to his knees. Trying the first two in the lock he grunted when neither worked. Finally the third being the charm the metal lock came undone. Opening the chest he smiled to find more blankets inside, finally he felt less helpless. He also found emergency nightstick/flares that he could snap to illuminate the cabin with. There was a ranger uniform and gloves inside as well.

"What is it?" she asked leaning forward.

"Blankets, thick ones…." He said never so happy to actually see them. Pulling out the flare sticks that didn't require a fuse, he hit them together making them cast an immediate warm yellowish glow through the cabin. Tossing each to the opposite side of the room, he felt warmer just by the dispelling of the shadows that hung over them since they found the place.

Standing he turned around and looked at the shelves. "There has to be first a first aid kit here, it's a ranger station for Christ sake" he said walking over and pulling at boxes.

"Thank you Todd" Evangeline mumbled, cradling her arm  
"For what?" he asked not bothering to look up from his pilfering.

"For saving my life" she said smiling weakly.

He stopped, looking back over his shoulder at her. "It's what you've been trying to do for me princess, just returning the favor." He said winking at her.

She nodded not saying anything. The pain in her head was subsiding some, though her ankle throbbed intensely.

"Found it!" Todd exclaimed shuffling back to the bed excited over his discovery.

Evangeline saw how he moved stiffly and looked at him concerned. "Are you hurt?"

"Old bruises mostly, from the beating I took in jail. What? You don't like my jailhouse walk?" he asked chucking.

Evangeline smiled at his joke "I'm so sorry they did that to you…"

"Not your fault…now let's see this ankle." he said pulling back to blanket covering her feet. He sat down on the edge of the cot reaching for it tenderly then rolling down her sock slowly. Evangeline flinched as it neared the swelling but she relaxed under his careful touch.

Looking in the dark at her ankle he saw the purple and red bruising, but no bone protrusions. "It's a bad sprang princess….I don't think it's broken."  
Evangeline nodded relieved. The idea of being trapped in a snowstorm with a broke ankle was less than appealing.  
.  
"I'm going to wrap it and that wrist of yours to get some of the pressure on the swelling to go down."

"Okay…"

She watched him as he worked on her, her eyes traveled over his solid frame showcased in that hideous orange prison jumpsuit on the front and back. "Guess you didn't think we'd end up here hunh?"

Todd shook his head "Nope, I kinda envisioned it would end a little differently." He chuckled.

"That's not funny Todd, it hurts me when you joke about your death that way. Life's not a joke, especially yours. You have too much to live for."

Todd looked up at her confused "It hurts you?"

"Of course it does…I care about you, so does Blaire. You need to believe in your self again. This attitude of yours is heart breaking."

"Evangeline, I love that you care, but Blaire doesn't and I've accepted that."

"How could you say that, you two are soul mates!" Evangeline said wincing as he wrapped the bandage tightly across her ankle under her foot.

"Like you and John are soul mates?" he asked looking up at her studying her face.

"Not the same thing"

"Why not?"

"John doesn't love me, never did" she said looking away hurt to have to say it out loud.

"Then he's a fool, because you have a lot to offer princess. Any man that walks away from your love is a fool, plain and simple." he said sincerely

Evangeline smiled "Since when did I become princess?"

"Since I came so close to loosing you." He said stopping to stare at her with a sly smile.

She couldn't understand how to take the open flirtatious undertone of that comment. She stared at him curiously, knowing he was always one to say exactly what was on his mind, she registered the sincerity. She wouldn't entertain the comment any further, though. She was tired of men that loved other women giving her sideways glances.

He took her wrist gently and ran his thumb across it softly. The light massage of his finger soothed the pain and sent a soft electric current through her arm warming her intimately. "Does it still hurt?" he asked in a low voice looking into her eyes.

"Only when I laugh" she said smiling, looking away to avoid what she was sure was desire.

Todd looked at how her face lit up when she smiled. It enhanced her beauty greatly. He smiled back, while wrapping her wrist, not ignoring the need he was feeling to be closer to her.

Evangeline looked around taking in everything. "We can't stay here long"

"Well you can't walk…and that Noreaster you mentioned earlier is here. We won't be going anywhere"

"Can we start a fire?"

"I don't think so" he said tightening her bandages, making her suck in her breath wincing.

"There, how does that feel?"

She looked down at it "Fine, how did you know how to do this?"

"Been on the run before, had to improvise at times" he shrugged

She nodded "I see"

Todd moved closer lifting her chin with his hand to look at the bruise on the side of her face. Moving her hair from her face he saw a cut and was relieved that it wasn't deep. Turning he reached for the antiseptic and large band aids "Do you think they're looking for us Todd?" she asked as he cleaned her head wound.

"Of course, Llanview's prettiest attorney, savior of lost souls is missing. That hero cop of yours is probably putting on his cape scaling the tallest building to leap from into the night and find his damsel in distress."

She looked down "I'm not Natalie, I'm sure he'll look but I doubt he'll employ his super hero methods to rescue us."

Todd stopped dressing her head wound "You sure aren't Natalie, if you were I would have let that plane go down with you inside." He said laughing and she did as well. He saw her pain was real, as her laughter subsided and the wounded heart she know wore on her sleeve was open to his inspection. "Why do you do that, Evangeline?"

"What?"  
"Sell yourself short"  
"Trust me I'm not. I know my worth, I also know when a man doesn't value it. John could care less."

Todd shook his head "You know I'm not a fan of his. All the way back to me showing up with Walkers face we've been less than cordial, but Evangeline the man does care for you."

"Care maybe, love no…" she said wincing as he scraped at the scar on her forehead with a q-tip

Todd looked into her face. Her eyes vibrant and full of passion fixed onto his, her hair long and lying flat on both sides gave her a Pocahontas kind of appeal. She was such a gem and he hated that she'd been hurt so badly by that idiot cop. He wished Blaire had the belief and commitment Evangeline offered to those she loved or believed in.

"What are you thinking?" she asked noticing how he was kept giving her penetrating stares.

"I'm thinking how glad I am that you're my friend." he said touching her cheek.

She smiled "You've been through a lot"  
"I'm okay…"

"She does love you Todd"

Todd put the bandages back in the kit. "Nope, she's Spencer girl now" he said rising from the bed and going back to the shelves.

Evangeline watched him confused "Do you really believe that? What is it with this Spencer thing?"

"He set me up Van, I'm telling you he did it to get to Blaire and I wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't in the bed with him right now."

"Are they sure? Are you sure!" Christian barked off at John.

John put his hand to his forehead leaning against the sink "The plane went down shortly after take off. The tower got a mayday before it dropped off radar"

Christian felt as if he'd been punched in the chest. Sucking in several deep breaths before breathing again, he felt a deep sense of panic rise in him. "Dammit!"

Antonio looked at John, his brow creased in disbelief. "It doesn't mean she's dead bro…"

"I know man, I know….I would feel it if she was. She's out there in that storm and I have to get to her." John said finally feeling as if he was in control again.

Antonio nodded "What do you need me to do?"

"We have to get to the mountain. I need a helicopter that will fly in this storm"  
Christian looked back toward the bathroom as he paced "Do you even know where she went down?" he ask his voice tight with tension.

John's phone began to vibrate on his hip. Reaching for it he saw it was the station. He opened it immediately.

"Hello"  
"John, it's Bo…"  
"What's the word Bo?"  
"I just wanted you to know that the FAA has located the signal of the black box on the plane….we are sending two teams out now to search for survivors."

"Bo, I need to be a part of this"  
"John….I'm sorry. I really am but the storm is bad as it is. I had to pull some strings to get an emergency airlift out there. I can't pull you in just as yet. You wouldn't be of any help now anyway."

John walked out of the bathroom passed Antonio "What part of the mountain….where was the signal?"

"I don't know that John, besides I'm on my way back to the hospital now. I just came back to the station to make sure that a search team was in place."

John frowned "The hospital?"

"Oh, yeah it's the night of the unexplainable. Nora's awake."

John eyes grew wide "She's what?"

"She's awake John, and the weirdest thing happened."

"What?"

"She knew about Evangeline, she's been asking for her repeatedly. I don't know how to explain it but she came out of the coma screaming Evangeline's name."

John stood still frowning while Antonio and Christian watched him. He didn't know what to make of that and really had no time to digest it further. "Bo as soon as they've found the wreckage I need you to call me!"

"I promise." Bo said hanging up.

John put the phone back on his hip and Christian looked at him hopeful moving closer into his space. "Where is she? What did they find?"

"They got a signal from the plane, their sending teams out now to look for her."

"I want to go.." Christian said "She's my friend and she needs my help."

"I don't need you tagging along I can protect her!" John snapped.

"Yeah right, as if you care!" Chris said rolling his eyes walking away.

"What he hell does that mean?" John shouted coming toward him.

"You two stop it! We don't have time for this right now!" Antonio said stepping in between them

Christian turned around and smirked "It means that you've never put her first, and she needs someone that really cares about her well being. Since you aren't man enough to do it I'll step up!"

John lost it rushing toward Christian. Antonio tried to stop him but he shoved him away punching Christian in the jaw sending him to the ground. Christian touched the blood on lips and jumped to his feet charging at John bent taking him in the gut, sending him crashing to the floor. The men began to swing and Antonio had to jump on his brothers back to pull them apart "Stop it!" he shouted throwing Christian off John.

He turned on them both. "She's missing and we may be her only hope. Stop this now!"  
John sat up his hair in his face. He was so tired of people assuming what his feelings were. He loved her more than his own life and when he found her he would tell her that.  
Antonio stuck out his hand and John grabbed it coming up off the ground. He went to Christian extending his hand, but he refused it, standing on his own.

Cutting his eyes at them both he went over to the breakfast bar and sat on the stool. Antonio ignored him wanting to get back to Evangeline, every minute counted. "What do you want to do now bro? Even if I get you a copter tonight, there is zero visibility. We should wait until the morning, that's if the storm breaks."

"She may not have that long, and the snow could cover everything by then" John said shaking his head sadly

"Then what? Lantana Mountain is too big to cover in one night, especially in a blizzard."

John shoved his hands in his pockets parting his trench behind his arms. "I'll call my boy at the FBI and get a read on where the FAA says it went down. That will give us a lead"

Antonio nodded "Cool let me try to get us a helicopter" he said walking away.

John looked over at Christian glaring at him. Sighing, and recognizing that many would view his concern the same way after the way he treated her, he approached him. "Look, we both care about her man, I love her and I want to find her to tell her that. I don't need you to believe me, I just ask that you stop fighting me. I'm not the enemy"

Christian stared into his nemesis blue eyes "She deserves better than you, but I will do anything to help her. She was the only person that never gave up on me, so neither of us will give up on her. Deal?"

"Deal…" John said extending his hand  
Christian accepted his hand and shook it reluctantly.  
Blair picked up Jack's action figure from the middle of the floor walking across the carpet in his room. Going to his bed she quietly placed the little warrior on the shelf above his bed and then pulled the covers over him. Looking down at his blonde bang in his face she thought of his father in that moment. Jack looked more and more like his dad.

Her chest tightened and she forced the image of his Todd's face from her mind. He was dead to her. Leaning over she kissed her son lightly on the forehead and then turned exiting the room.

Closing the door silently she looked at Starr's door. Sighing she walked over trying the knob to find it locked. Blair rolled her eyes, not wanting to fight with her child anymore but terrified she was loosing her. What was she going to do when they executed him? How would she keep her family together then? Just then she heard the doorbell downstairs.

Blair let go of the door and headed to the stairs. Coming down the winding stairs in her cream robe with floor length matching nightgown underneath she tightened the sash. Heading for the door she silently hoped it wasn't Spencer, she should have never slept with him. She just wasn't ready for anything complicated.

"Who is it?"  
"LPD mam, open up"

Blaire blinked surprise and undid the latch to the door. "Is it Todd?" she asked her heart pounding in her chest. A visit in the middle of the night from the police had to be about Todd.

The officers looked at her "Are you Ms. Manning?"  
Blaire held her robe closed and looked at them alarmed "Yes, what is it?"  
"I'm sorry Ms. Manning there's been an accident can we come in"

Blair backed up from the door her hands trembling, she shook her head no confused by their appearance and dreading the news "No…please!" she lied she did care what happened to him. The look on the officer's face had her terrified.

The officer closed the door as the other looked at her sadly. "The plane transporting your husband this evening is suspected to have been a crashed near Lantana Mountain"

Blaire screamed waking the entire floor on her penthouse level falling back into the desk behind her "NOOOO!" she screamed even louder.

_"Hush little baby don't say a word….momma's going to buy you a mocking bird….and when daddy gets out of jail…Everything for us will be just swell….Daddy loves his baby a lot….Blaire and her kids can just go rot….Mmmm hmmmm…."_

Margaret rocked in the rocking chair holding Todd Jr close to her bosom. Spencer told her he had to move her to a new location for Todd to find them. He said he would be coming soon. Looking at the TV screen she saw an image of Todd and his attorney come up side by side. She grabbed the remote turning the TV up.

_This just in. The convicted baby killer Todd Manning and renowned attorney Evangeline Williamson are currently reported missing. The flight transport they boarded this evening lost contact with the radio tower around 9pm tonight. At this time there is no word on any survivors…._

Margaret stopped rocking in her chair and glared at the TV screen struggling to digest the new bulletin. "Not my Todd!" she hissed through clench teeth. "NOT MY TODD!" she screamed in a loud shrill that made the baby burst into tears and the neighbors all around turn on their lights to the maniacal howling that chilled them through the night.

Todd inventoried all that they had. Blankets, two flashlights, a book of matches, an old bag of Chex Mix and a half eaten candy bar that was in the back of the drawer, he hadn't located any radio equipment yet, and the chill of the cabin accompanied by the head wound he had made him weak with exhaustion.

Looking over to Evangeline who was watching him pace he stopped and smiled "I don't know princess….things look rough"

"Leave it Todd, we can't do anything more tonight. You look tired."

Todd nodded "I'll make a pallet on the floor"'

Evangeline shook her head "It's below twenty degrees outside so I know it has to be even cooler in here. We sleep together; our body heat can keep us warm, besides we need every blanket we can find to cover us, in order for us to survive."

Todd looked at her surprised "You sure?"

Evangeline laughed "Oh cut it out, we're just sleeping Todd. I think we can handle it."

Todd nodded flashing her a devilish grin that made her blush "Oh yeah, that's right just sleep, although there are other way to generate body heat." He said innocently going to the trunk and pulling out the three other blankets.

Evangeline shook her head smiling. "Wow, you're such a charmer, Todd Manning" she chuckled as she unzipped her other boot and tossed it over the side of the bed. Todd climbed on the cot and got behind her so his back would be against the wall. Throwing the covers over them, he reached around her to make sure she was covered. Lying his head on the pillow next to her he smelled her fragrant shampoo as his face came into contact with the silky strands of her hair.

Evangeline scooted back into him finally feeling warm and safe. Todd slipped his strong arm around her waist and pulled her into his chest. "You okay, princess?"

"Yes…" she said making sure she laid her wrist in a way it didn't hurt and her ankle was positioned comfortably.

Todd lay next to her pushing his face into her hair that was sprawled on the pillow. She wasn't aware of it but a small smile widen on his face as he enjoyed the comfort of her curves pressed against him. She made him feel safe.

written by tarskeewee08

Back to Index

Chapter 4: Lost Souls 

"I'll kill him! I'll do it myself, with my bare hands." Margaret said threw a clenched jaw. She paced back and forth in front of Todd Jr's crib wringing her hands her hair flying behind her. Her eyes were wide as she stopped at Todd's crib, "You're daddy's not dead, I know it I would feel it TJ." She said softly.

Looking down at the sleeping baby she had to figure out what to do next, "This is all Spencer's fault!" she snapped. "This whole damn plan was just stupid, I just should have taken your daddy with us so that we could be a family. You know that's what he wants right for us to be a family; you and me Todd Jr." She stroked the baby's stomach as it rose and fell trying to figure out her next move.

Taking a step back she sat back down in the rocking chair and moved slowly back and forth, "Spencer said that he would bring daddy to us Todd Junior. Now that daddy was in a plane crash with that lawyer of his. I don't know what we're going to do. Spencer has to pay though…" she mumbled as she continued to rock back and forth.

Her head swimming with ideas of how to make Spencer pay, this was all his fault. He put them in this position he wanted Blair for himself, "Damn Blair! What is about that tramp that gets the guys all hot and bothered! She has nothing on you're momma Todd Junior. Nothing, crazy woman, and they call me crazy! She's the one with mental instability in her whole family. I'm not crazy, right? Didn't think so… That's my boy…" Margaret said softly as she slowed the rocker down. Walking over to the night stand she pulled out the prepaid cell phone that Spencer had given her in case Todd Junior needed anything they didn't already have.

"Dr. Truman…" He mumbled as he looked at the unknown number on his caller id.  
"We need to talk."  
"Who is this?"  
"Margaret! Damnit Spencer, we need to talk. Something bad has happened to Todd Junior's father and it's your fault."  
"What?"  
"His plane crashed damn it. How do you not know these things."  
Spencer sat on the phone quietly as a sinister smiled spread across his lips, "Blair…" he mumbled.  
"No not Blair! Me! Get over here right now!"  
"I have to see about Blair." Spencer snapped the phone shut and slipped it into his pocket.

He walked past the nurses' station and let them know he was stepping out for a bit. "Page me if you need anything, otherwise I'll be back later."  
"Yes Doctor…" She called after him as Spencer stepped into the elevator.

Sitting on her chaise lounge rocking back and forth as she held her robe closed the two officers stared at each other not knowing what to do. She was mumbling something that neither of them understood, "Do something!" the younger officer said pushing his partner.

He looked at her and then back at his partner then back at Blair that seemed to be in a complete state of shock. He knelt down in front of her and she looked up at him as he placed his hand over hers. "Ms. Manning, the commissioner wanted us to bring you down to the station."  
"He's not dead… " she mumbled. Shaking her head back and forth her soft brown locks flew in her face, "He wasn't supposed to die he was supposed to fight." She said staring at him.

Starr came down the stairs holding Jacks hand as they stared at their mother, "Mom… what's going on?" Starr said as she approached her mother and the two officers.  
Blair looked up at her daughter and over at her son and only saw Todd's face staring back at her. She broke out in hysterical tears and Starr rushed to her mother's side. Blair opened her arms to her daughter and son hugging them close as she sobbed against Starr's face. "What did you say to her!" Starr snapped at one of the officers.

They both looked at each other confused, not sure if they should tell her what was going on or not. "Ma'am we really need to get back to the station." The younger officers said staring down at the family.  
"Mom what's going on? Is it about Dad, what happened!" Starr said panicking.  
Pulling out of the embrace Blair placed her hands over Starr's "You're daddy is fine, I just need to go to the police station with these officers. Stay here I'll call Dorian to come and watch you two."  
"I'm going with you!" Starr snapped pushing her mom's hands away.  
"You are staying her young lady." Blair said standing in front of Starr.

Jack backed away holding is frog tight to his chest and watched as his mother and sister glare at each other, "You either take me with you now or I sneak out on Aunt Dorian." Starr seethed folding her arms across her chest.  
"Don't test me young lady."  
"I don't know why you care, I know this is about dad. You can't hide that from me. You don't believe he's innocent anyway, so just let me go. I'm the only one in this family that believes in him anyways!"  
"You're staying here!"  
"I'm going!" Starr yelled and turned to run up the stairs.  
"Starr Manning get back here right now! We aren't finished." Blair called after her. Running after Starr her robe flying behind her Jack sat down on the couch and looked at the two officers, "Is my daddy okay?" he said softly.

The two officers smiled politely and sat down next to him. "I don't know son…" the older one said patting Jack on the head, "I don't know…."

Antonio walked back in to the living room to see both John and Cristian pacing back and forth. John saw him first and looked up with some semblance of hope in his eyes, "What did they say bro?"  
"I got us one but the pilot won't fly in this storm man."  
"I don't care about a damn storm, she is out there scared and with Manning of all people!"  
"John there was nothing I could do. I have one chartered for when this storm clears but who knows when that will be." Antonio looked at John and then back at Cristian. "What do we do now?" Cris said walking up.  
"We find her, that's what we do!" John snapped. "Get that pilot back on the phone, I'll convince him to get us up in the air."  
"How?"  
"I don't know how. I do know that I have to though. She is all that matters right now." John snatched Antonio's phone from him and redialed the last number in his cell phone.

Cristian stared at John with a raised eyebrow as he walked back and forth across the apartment. "He's desperate man." Cris mumbled to Antonio.  
"I've never seen him like this Cris, never. Not even the first time she went missing."  
"The first time, you mean with Barber?"  
"Yeah, he was freaking out then too, but nothing like this." They both watched as John paced back and forth on the cell phone.

"I don't think you understand! She is out there with a convicted criminal, lord knows what he is doing to her!" John shouted into the phone.  
"I'm sorry like I told Antonio there is no way the tower will let anyone up tonight. They've grounded everything across the whole eastern seaboard. I'm sorry."  
"How much…" John said softly as he ran his hand over his face.

Antonio and Cris looked at him confused as they approached John. "Excuse me?" the pilot asked.  
"How much do you want? I'll pay whatever it is to get me in the air right now to look for that plane."  
"I'm sorry sir but there isn't a dollar figure that would make me fly in this weather. I told Antonio as soon as the tower clears people to start flying again I would give him a call, but until then my hands are tide."  
"Bull shit!" John snapped and ended the call. Throwing the phone back at Antonio he walked to the door and opened it and shut it without another word.

"I don't think that went the way he was planning on it…" Cris said staring at the closed door.  
Antonio shook his head, "He needs her man, never realized how much till now. I don't even think he did."

"What do you have for me?" Bo said standing behind his desk. His face was worn from only the few hours that had gone by since finding out about the crash and Evangeline. His face haggard his tie undone and the first few buttons of his shirt unbuttoned.

His world had been turned upside down in a matter of minutes, first Evangeline then Nora, what was next? At least for the time being John was letting him do his job and not interfering but he knew that it was only a matter of time before John showed back up here trying to get any information about the plane and what happened to it.

"Yeah I'm still here." He said as the official from the FAA came on the line.  
"We have men at the site right now, and they are looking for the black box. It doesn't look good though…"  
Bo blew out a deep breath, "Any survivors?"  
"They haven't reported that back yet, they just arrived at the site, but it's a ball of flames from the pictures they are sending back. There is no way that anyone survived this."

Bo lowered his head into his hands fighting back the tears that welled in his eyes. His voice shaking he thanked the officer and told him to keep him in contact about whatever it is they find. Setting the phone back in the cradle Bo stared at his computer screen as a few emails from the FAA official came across his screen. He looked at the emails and the pictures of the crash from a telephoto lens. The images made his stomach churn and he could feel his dinner trying to make its way back up.

He closed his eyes and closed the emails out. A knocking at the door startled him, "Come in!" he yelled.  
Officer Perry walked in, "Franks and Wallace just called in they have Blair Manning on the way in sir."  
"Thanks…" Bo mumbled looking up at him.  
"No problem sir, is there anything else we can do? We all want to help, Ms. Williamson was like one of us." He said softly.  
Thinking about his next step and how John was going to handle the news and how he was going to tell Evangeline's family not to mention Blair and the kids he smiled weakly, "Get someone over to Capricorn and bring in Layla Williamson." He said almost forgetting about Evangeline's sister.  
"Sir, we'll get right on that." The door closed softly and Bo turned his chair around. This was not what was supposed to happen, she couldn't be dead.

"Welcome to Capricorn… What can I get you guys tonight?" Layla said smiling her tray tucked under her arm, her hair pulled back behind her ears. She wore a bright smile as she waited on a group of what looked like out of towners. They eyed her up and down and she gave them a seductive smile, anything to get the tips.

"I'll take you…" The guy on the end said grabbing her hand.  
"I'm not on the menu." She said sweetly and snatched her hand back.  
He let his eyes roam over her body looking at the curve of her butt and then back at her, "Well give me a beer whatever's on tap." He said licking his lips.  
Layla nodded and then smiled at the other two guys, "A Manhattan." Said the guy in the middle.  
"And for you?" She said softly leaning her arm against the edge of the both.  
He smiled and fingered the list of beers, "Whatever's on tap for me too."  
"I'll be right back. My name's Layla if you need anything." She said before she sashayed away back to the bar.

Dropping her tray on bar she nodded to Jake the bartender and put in her order. She gripped the bar as her stomach tightened in fierce knots. "You okay?" He asked setting the beers on her tray.  
She smiled and shook her head, "I don't know… My stomach is killing me." She said wincing from the tight pain  
"It might be that stomach bug that's been going around."  
Layla shook her head no, "It's something worse. I don't know what it is, but it's bad." She said pulling the tray from the bar. "Thanks."

Walking back over she set the guys drinks down in front of them and looked up in time to see an officer talking with another waitress. They pointed in Layla's direction and she felt her stomach cramp tighter. Holding it she smiled at the guys and moved away toward the officer that was slowly advancing on her.  
"Are you Layla Williamson?"  
"Yes, what's going on?" She asked concerned.  
"Commissioner Buchanan asked that you be brought to the station."  
"What's going on!" she asked again more panicky this time.  
"Ma'am if you please would just come with me. I rather let the Commissioner explain." Officer Andrews knew and liked Evangeline, there was no way he was going to tell her baby sister that her sister was in a plane crash and might be dead. Layla snatched her arm from him, "Tell me what is going on now!" She yelled causing all the customers to turn and look at her.

Officer Andrews shook his head. His orders were to bring her in, not cause her to flip out on him because of the news. "Please ma'am…" he said softly placing his hand over hers.

Layla took a step back and stared into the officer's eyes. They were sad, not scared, not worried, not angry, or hopeful but sad. Feeling her stomach cramping tighter she set her tray down and walked back to the back of the bar. She came out a few moments later with her coat on and followed the officer out without a word. It was bad and she could feel it deep down, something had happened and it wasn't good, in fact it was terrible.

She sat next to Officer Andrews in the front seat of the police cruiser her hands in tight fists the whole way there. He had turned down the police radio and the regular radio so the ride from Capricorn to the station was silent. She caught his side ways glances out the corner of her eye and felt as if he was hiding something major from her. All she wanted to do was slam on the brakes of the car and force him to tell her what was going on.

Spencer rang the doorbell to the penthouse and waited for Blair to answer. "Coming!" he heard someone yell that wasn't Blair.  
Raising his eyebrow he looked at the door curiously as it flung open. "Ahh Dorian…" He said smiling at her.  
"Spencer, what are you doing here at this time of night?" She questioned as he pushed his way into the penthouse.  
"I just heard the news on Todd and I was concerned. Is Blair here?"

Dorian turned as she closed the door and walked over to him. "No she's not, she went to the police station with Starr to find out what happened. How did you know?"  
"Like I said I was watching the news in the lounge at the hospital when the report came on." He said turning to face her.

Dorian smiled politely and offered him a seat, "No, no thank you…" Spencer said walking to the door. "You said they were at the police station?" He said looking over his shoulder at her.  
"Yes but she is there with Bo, she won't need you."  
"She will thanks for the information Dorian." Spencer closed the door tightly as he left the penthouse.

Staring at the closed door Dorian wondered how and why Spencer would even care about Todd and Blair in the first place.

Todd Junior slept in silently in the crib as his mother paced back and forth around him. She wrung her hands and then shook them out as a knock came at the back door to the house that Spencer had her hiding out in. Walking over to it she opened it hoping it was him. "Good you're here perfect." She said opening the door.  
"Well when my favorite customer calls I come a running. "He said smiling at her.

Margaret took a step back as the young Hispanic guy came into the small basement apartment, "I thought you were dead lady."  
"Everyone did…" she mumbled as she closed the door behind him, "Listen Miguel I don't have time to deal with you right now, did you bring what I asked for?"  
"Yeah sure did. Just like the last one I sold you. Hey what ever happened to that, that was a good piece?"  
"Yeah I know… I had to get rid of it. I can't pay you in full right now, All I've got is fifty on me. But you know I'm good for it right?" she questioned holding the money up in front of him.  
"Yeah I do, and thanks to you lady my business has tripled." He said smiling as he snatched the money out of her hand.

Margaret smiled at the young Hispanic guy who stood five foot six. His jet black hair slicked away from his face filled with acne. How he ever got into the gun dealing business she would never know. She took the brown bag from him and smiled into it. "We're going to get you're daddy back if it's the last thing we do…" She said smiling over at a sleeping TJ.

"What you had a baby!" he snapped smile, "No shit!"  
"Watch your language!" Margaret snapped glaring at him.  
"Oh sorry lady. Thanks for the repeat business and keep it coming, you know where to find me."  
"Yeah thanks." She pushed him out of the door and threw the brown paper bag back on the bed. She watched as his feet ran passed the window that sat above her and smiled to her self. "Now all we need is that mean nasty man…." She said wide eyed.

John stormed into the police station dead set on getting some answers from anyone. No one kept him out of the loop when it came to Evangeline. Pushing open the door to Bo's office without knocking he saw Bo with his back to him. "What did the FAA say!" John said heated.

Bo turned around staring at him. He rose from his desk and walked around it, "I don't have to tell you anything John, you're not on this case." He said firmly.  
John smiled a self deprecating smile, "You have to tell me Bo. I need to know!" he said softly.  
"I can't let you in on this John, you're too close."  
"You let me in when she was kidnapped."  
"Yeah and you about lost your lid there too. I saw the way you handled Roxie at the Women of the Year Banquet."  
"She was kidnapped Bo! What was I supposed to do? And that drunk woman knew what happened to her!"

Bo sat on the edge of his desk and crossed his arms, "I need you to stay out of this, all the way out of it John. You are a good cop but this is way to close for you to handle, I mean you were supposed to be on that flight too."  
"I should have been, then I could have taken care of her." He mumbled looking down at his shoes.

"John don't blame your self for this…" Bo said as his phone started to ring. John sprung from his seat and watched as Bo reached across the desk for the phone.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on now!" Starr snapped as her and Blair walked into the Police station.  
"I brought you here so that I could keep an eye out on you. Now sit and stay put." Blair snapped pushing Starr into a chair.  
"Just tell me what's going on Mom, I deserve to know." Starr yelled.  
"Fine, you're father and Evangeline were in a plane crash you happy!" she yelled storming off to Bo's office.

Pushing open the door she slammed it shut, "What do you know!" she said glaring at Bo.  
John looked up from the corner of the room at Blair. Bo held up his hand to signal her one moment, "No I want you to tell me what the hell is going on! How did Todd and Evangeline end up in a plane crash? What did he do? What are you guys doing to figure this out? I want to know and I want to know now!" Blair snapped.

"Count me in too!" Starr said pushing open Bo's office.  
Bo hung up the phone and stared at the two of them. John came walking back over to Bo as his arms folded across his chest, "What did the FAA say?" he said sadly.  
"They recovered the black box and they are taking it back to their lab to have it analyzed, but there were no survivors John, Blair I'm sorry." He said sadly.

Blair felt her chest rise and fall quicker than it had the first time she heard the news. Her head spinning her heart racing she saw his face flash before her eyes over and over again as the plane crashed he called for her, begging that he believe in him.

John gripped the chair in front of him. She wasn't dead, he would feel it if she was dead. He would know it, he knew what it's like for someone that you love to die and this isn't the feeling, "She's not dead…" he mumbled holding back the tears of fear and desperation he was sure Evangeline was feeling, "I'm telling you right now that she's not dead!" he snapped glaring at Bo.  
"John I'm sorry… The plane was in complete flames from the crash there was no way that she survived the crash. Todd either."

Star walked up and looked at Bo, "My dad's not dead! Don't say that! He can't be dead. You're lying!" she yelled. "You're lying! You're lying!" she screamed over and over again.

Blair stood watching her daughter yell and scream that her father wasn't dead, she didn't believe it either. Why was Bo standing there telling her that Todd was dead, this was some cruel trick that he was playing on her because she slept with Spencer. Feeling the room spinning Blair gripped the chair in front of her to steady herself.

Bo swallowed hard, closing his eyes images of Evangeline's beautiful face popped into his mind, she was gone and there was nothing that he could do about it.

Layla walked into the police station behind Officer Andrews. The whole ride was silent. Slipping her hands in her coat pocket her head down she ran into someone, "Watch it!" Natalie snapped.  
"Watch it yourself." Layla said back her eyes narrowing on the girl in front of her.  
"Layla I'm sorry…" Natalie said softly.  
"Yeah I'm sure you are!"  
"I am. I'm sorry about Evangeline I heard."

Layla looked at her confused and shook her head, "What are you talking about what happened with Evangeline?"  
Natalie looked back at Bo's closed door and then back at Layla, "No one told you?"  
"Told me what!" Layla said getting anxious.  
"I'm sorry but…"

"Stop it Natalie!" John snapped coming out of Bo's office.  
"John I was trying to help…" she said looking up at him.  
"No you weren't. You don't know what it means to help." He said heated as he glared at her.  
"Now you wait just a damn minute. Is it my fault that no one's told her that her sister's dead!" Natalie said rolling her eyes.  
"She's what?" Layla said putting her hand over her mouth.

John turned from Natalie and to Layla. Layla stared at John tears welling in her eyes as they started to roll down her cheeks at a fast pace. John reached out to touch her and Layla flinched pulling her hand back and backing away from John, "Layla she's not dead."  
"But John… that's not…" Natalie started to say.  
John turned around fire brimming in his eyes, "Stay out of this now Natalie, she's not dead. I know you would like to think that but she's not dead!" John snapped.  
"I don't…" Natalie shook her head.

Layla glared at Natalie as Natalie tried to conjure up fake tears, "Don't you even start." Layla hissed rushing Natalie. "If you even start crying because he yelled at you I'll be sure to give you something that will really make you cry!" Layla said heated as she got in her face. "You really should keep your nose out of other peoples business before something bad happens to you!" Layla snapped.

Natalie fixed her face and halted the fake tears she was trying to muster, "Are you going to stand there and let her talk to me that way?" She questioned looking at John.  
"I don't care about what you're feeling right now Natalie, my plate is too full worrying about Evangeline."  
Layla wiped her eyes and turned to look at John who had his head down, "My sister's not dead is she?" She said shaking John.  
"No…" he mumbled.  
"Then what is she talking about, why am I just now hearing about this. Why are you keeping stuff from me?" Layla said pushing John in the chest.

John looked up at her unable to answer any of her questions. He was so wrapped up in what he was feeling, the idea of loosing Evangeline before she truly knew how much he loved and cared about her ate at him second by second, minute by minute. All of his energy was spent on trying to keep himself together he completely forgot about Layla. All he knew was that he had to get her back, if not for himself then for Layla.

Taking Layla's arm John took her to his old office to explain everything. Natalie watched them go and shook her head at the site. Since when did John become all about Evangeline?

Blair sat in the chair in Bo's office rocking back and forth as she held herself. She looked up to see Starr crying and then the side door open. In walked Spencer and she rushed into his arms. He stroked the back of her hair and smiled sweetly at Starr. Starr glared at the man trying desperately to take her father's place and then back down at the floor.

"How did you know?" Blair mumbled against Spencer's chest.  
"I heard it on the news, then I went by your Penthouse to see what I could do. Dorian told me I could find you two here. What did you learn? Is Todd okay?"  
"They say he's dead!" Starr snapped, "I bet you're happy about that aren't you…" she said disgusted.

"Starr!" Blair said pulling from Spencer's hug.  
"What mom! He comes here and the first thing you do is rush into his stupid arms! I mean we just found out that they think Daddy's dead and there you are taking up with another man."  
"I'm not doing that Starr and you know it. Spencer is just friend."  
Wiping her eyes on her long sleeve she stared at her mother, "Please… I'll be outside I'm not going to watch you salivate all over my mother."

Storming out of Bo's office Starr walked out to the bull pen and sat at an empty desk.  
Blair watched her daughter go and then turned back to Spencer. Finding solace in his arms she buried her head in his chest and let him hug her. "Let me take you two home, there isn't anything you guys can do here tonight." He said softly as he rocked her back and forth.  
Blair nodded into his chest. Spencer put his hand on the door to open it and pulled Blair out. Walking around the corner he called to Starr, "What!" she snapped.  
"Quit it now young lady! I don't have time to deal with your attitude right now." Blair said narrowing her eyes on Starr. "Now come on, there is nothing we can do here."  
"What we're leaving!" she said panicking.  
"Yes, Spencer has offered to take us home, now let's go."

Starr held her ground, "You're just going to give up just like that! No fight no nothing. Daddy isn't dead and I don't know how you can believe that."  
"I don't but Bo said the FAA didn't find any survivors."  
"That doesn't mean that he and Ms. Williamson didn't escape. Come on mom you know dad he has like a hundred lives!"  
"That maybe true but there is nothing we can do. The FAA and the police are looking for him if he is still alive."  
"It's not if mom! He is alive!" she snapped walking past her. Blair rolled her eyes and turned on her heels. Walking out after her daughter Spencer slipped his hands into his coat pocket and followed the two ladies out.

"I don't understand John…" Layla said holding in her tears, her voice shaky with fear and sadness.  
John shook his head back and forth, "Some how your sister got on Manning's flight. The plane went down that's all I know. But I'm going to find her." He said staring her dead in the eyes.

Layla stared back reading the expression on his face. It was honest, sincere but mostly desperate, desperate to find her sister, "Promise me…"  
John held up his hand, "I promise you that I will bring her back safe and sound if it's the last thing I do Layla." He said softly.

Reaching out to touch his face Layla let the tears roll down her cheeks. John closed his eyes at the touch, so much like her sisters, soft and innocent but filled with hope. "I have to bring her back." He said softly removing her hand from his face.  
"How? They don't believe she's alive?"  
"I don't know Layla. I know she's not dead." He grabbed his stomach, "I would know… some how I would know."  
"Me too." She said hugging her body and sliding down in to the chair behind her.

John sat on the edge of the desk in front of her his hands on the desk he stared at Layla. He never noticed how much they did look alike. His phone buzzing in his pocket startling him, "McBain." He said standing up straight.  
"John bro why didn't you call and tell me!" Michael said quickly.  
"Mike, I can't talk now. Evangeline is missing."  
"The news said she's dead man."  
"She's not dead." He snapped.  
"Hey chill bro. I'm just saying what the news is reporting. Now why didn't you call me? You know I love E too!"

John shook his head and let out a deep sigh, "I'm sorry Michael. I'm kinda dealing with my own stuff right now and the fact that Bo won't let me help look for her and Manning."  
"Figured." Michael said rolling his eyes, "Listen did Bo tell you that Nora's awake."  
"She's what!" Johns asked shocked.  
Michael fell back against the nurse's station sticking his hand into his white doctor's lab coat. "Yeah she woke up screaming something about Evangeline, Bo didn't tell you?"  
"No…" John looked past Layla and out into the hallway. Why wouldn't Bo tell him that Nora woke up and screamed Evangeline's name?  
"Can you get me in to see her?"  
"I don' t know man…I mean she's still pretty bad off, she's been in a coma for months."

"Listen Michael everyone around here thinks that Evangeline is dead, I need to talk to Nora."  
"Why?"  
"I don't know Michael, she is Evangeline's best friend. I just need to know that believing that she's not dead is what I should be doing…." John said sadly.  
"I'll see what I can do."  
"Thanks Michael."  
"I'm doing this for E not you."  
"Whatever." John snapped his phone shut putting it back into his pocket.

"Nora's awake?"  
"Looks like it, I'm going to go talk to her."  
"Why, she's been in a coma for months John." Layla said rising from her seat.  
"I don't know… Michael said she woke up screaming your Evangeline's name. There has to be something there." John said walking to the door.  
"Find her please…" Layla called out after John before she slid into the chair.

"Where are you!" Margaret snapped into the phone.  
"I'm with Blair, what is it."  
"Todd Junior isn't feeling well. He's crying and screaming and he's warm and I don't know what to do. You're a doctor!"  
"I'll be right there."  
"Good." Margaret ended the call and held the gun tightly in her hand. She smiled her sinister smile as she sat on the bed and kicked her feet back. She had moved Todd Junior out of the small bedroom and into the small living room in the basement of the abandoned house.

Twenty minutes later

Margaret slid the gun under her pillow as heard Spencer's heels clicking on the concrete above her. Hearing him descend the steps in the back of the house to the separate basement entrance she flung the door open.  
"Where's the baby."  
"I moved him the screaming was getting louder and louder." She said moving to back to allow him into the basement.  
"I don't hear anything?"  
"Yeah he just stopped a few moments ago. I was going to go see about him when I heard you coming."  
"Let me." Spencer walked to the door and tried to push it open. Feeling something sticking in his back he froze with his hand on the door, "You said that we were going to be together Todd and I. He's dead because of your plan." Margaret said cocking the gun.

"What are you doing?" Spencer said looking over his shoulder.  
"Getting revenge for the love of my life, you killed him by sending him to death row and now I'm going to kill you."

John stepped off the hospital elevator and saw Michael waiting for him at the nurse's station. Following him down the long corridor the lights low and flickering on and off, he hated hospitals everything about them and especially at night. He never understood why Michael wanted to be a doctor.

Michael looked back at John, "You only have a few moments okay." He said softly.  
John nodded and looked into Nora' room. Taking a few steps in Michael closed the door behind him and Nora turned to look at him, "She's not dead…" she croaked out holding her throat from the pain still in it from the tubes in her mouth.

written by oltlfantimes10

Back to Index

Chapter 5: Lost Souls 

"I'm really glad to see that you are up Nora…" John said stepping toward the bed.  
Nora swallowed before speaking "You have to find her, I'm telling you…." She said her voice growing hoarse. Closing her eyes she sucked in a deep breath trying to pace herself. Opening them she pointed to the pitcher and cup on the dresser near her bed.

John understood what she needed, walking over to the dresser he poured her a cup. Putting the straw in it he handed it to her. Nora accepted the water swallowing the cool liquid. Her throat wasn't the main source of her struggles. Her head felt heavy and the drugs they had to make sure she didn't have any more seizures were having a dizzying affect on her. Yet she had to tell John what she'd seen. Evangeline desperately needed their help.

John watched her closely. He didn't know why he'd come and time was slipping away. He was desperate for any word on her. "Nora, I can come back"

Her hand shot out from the bed with tubing attached to the top of it and around her wrist. "Wait!" she said quickly.

John felt the desperation in her grip, it forced him to look back into her eyes. She had a pleading look that stopped his heart. Nodding he pulled the chair next to him close and took a seat. "What is it?"

"I saw it, I saw the plane crash" she said in a whisper, finding it easier to speak that way.  
"You saw the crash? How?"

Shaking her head, long auburn strands fell into her face. She sucked in another deep breath then exhaled trying to gain some clarity at what she experienced in her coma. She knows it made little sense.

"While in a coma I saw Evangeline in a plane. She was crying and saying she didn't want to die, she was terrified. It may seem crazy but I felt her fear, it was so overwhelmingly strong it forced me awake." Her voice began to crack again but this time it was due to the emotions running through her.

"John, I keep getting flashes since then. On of them I saw her in the snow. Somebody was trying to make her wake up. I swear it John. It makes no sense, but I knew she was in a crash and I know she's alive in that storm" she said pointing to the falling snow outside her window.

John stared at her. "How? How did you…."

"Don't! Stop with the questions because I can't explain it any better than that. Just find her, she needs you….find our girl now!" Nora said glaring at him. If Bo hadn't confirmed that Evangeline was in a plane crash, she would have thought it was delusions from her unconscious mind. Somehow she felt her friend and she wasn't going to waste time on dissecting the how's and why's. She felt in her bones that Evangeline needed them and John had to find her.

He nodded wanting desperately to believe. "I can't get out in the storm, I don't even know the crash site"  
"Find her!" she said in a loud croaking voice that resonated through him.  
John felt his cell buzzing and reached for it immediately.

"McBain…"  
"What's up man…"  
"Wess?"  
"Yeah I got some info…"  
"Give it to me" he said walking away from the bed. Nora sat up watching him closely.  
"The plane went down over by Muskogee Lake on the Northwest side of Lantana Mountain."

John went back to the dresser, snatching the hospital pad and pen. "What about the condition of the plane, any bodies found?"

"Checked the facts and the plane broke apart on descent through that forested area, looks like it came down on the edge of the mountain, then fell over. It was found at the bottom of part of the mountain that had a 100ft drop."

"That means she could have been pulled out…"  
"Looks like it. But the FAA is saying no go because of the loss of cabin pressure indicates she most likely may have passed out before it touched down. Besides if she was, there is no shelter and that blizzard is relentless."

John fought off his panic. Wess was right about the storm, and if by some miracle she escaped the plane she could not survive those elements. Not in weather like this. "Is there any cabins or anything near this lake?"

"Checked out the basic land maps of that region….a couple of ranger stations for hikers but that's about it."  
"Ranger Stations?"  
"Yeah, their posted all over the mountains, you know to avoid forest fires and poaching…"  
"Are they populated?"  
"Not during the winter months. Most of them would be abandoned…you think she could held up in one?"  
"Maybe, can you get me a list of them around this lake….the ones within walking distance?"  
"Will do bro, can't before the morning…"  
"What!"  
"It'll take some extra work on my part, we just don't keep that information in the bureau, you guys are snowbound and I can't get anything tonight, nothing like that"  
"Dammit Wess! She's out there!"  
"And if she's in a Ranger Station she's got time, I will be on it as soon as possibl.e"

"Fine!" he said closing the phone. Turning he looked at Nora who stared at him hopeful "We might have a lead. I definitely know where the plane went down so it's a start"  
"Are you going now?" Nora asked  
"I can't…." he said sucking in his breath. "I can't get up in the air yet. No one will fly in the storm."

"John, she could be hurt, dying for that matter!" Nora snapped in a whisper

"Dammit I know!" he shouted. Nora blinked at him surprised and he regretted yelling immediately. "Nora, I am just as scared as you are…I don't want to loose her"

Nora cut her eyes "You sure about that?"

John looked at her confused "What?"

"You sure haven't been big on saving her before" Nora said not disguising her lack of faith in him. John felt as if she punched him in his chest. He knew he'd failed at other times to show her his love but he never failed in trying to keep her safe. He gave her up to keep her safe. "I deserve that."

"Yes you do!" Nora said

"Nora, you've been gone from us for a long time things have changed."

"Really?" she asked amused "You dumped the redhead?"

John sighed "We aren't together…"

"So you're with Evangeline?"

"No, it's just…."

"Enough, I'm tired and weak and I don't care. I will use you and your guilt or whatever motivates you now to find my friend. She communicated with me somehow and I won't fail her, I may be all she has."

John went back to her bedside and reached for Nora's hand. She immediately tried to pull it away, but he held it tightly forcing her to look at him. "Nora, look at me…"  
She looked at him and tried to remain focused. The drugs making her lids heavy, made her vision somewhat blurred. She still saw the pain and fear on his face.

"I never told her, I rarely showed her, and I should be saying this to her. But I need you and this whole town to know. I love her. I will fight whatever is out there keeping her from us and bring her home safe, and I plan to spend a lifetime making up for every tear or moment of pain she felt from loving me."

Nora looked at him stunned by the confession. She saw the intense determination in his blue eyes and believed every word. Her friend deserved to hear this for herself. "I believe you John."

John kissed her hand. "Get some sleep"

She nodded and watched as he let go of her hand turning to leave. Before he walked out she called out to him "John!"

Turning he looked at her "Yes"

"You tell her exactly that, the moment you lay eyes on her!" she said hoarsely.

He smiled at her renewed faith him then winked "Will do…"

The next morning

Evangeline let out a painful sigh. Her head was again throbbing from the bruise on the side of her face her ankle hurt ten times worse. Wincing as she moved it she opened her eyes to the pain.

"You okay over there princess?"

She looked over to see Todd at the desk in the cabin with a cb radio. Her eyes brightened with excitement "Oh my god is that what I think it is?"

Todd smiled slyly "Depends…what do you think it is?" he said pulling up the antenna and turning with the dials.

"Does it work Todd, please say it works?" she asked pulling herself up on her good hand sliding her foot gently with her.

"I've been messing with it all morning, it's battery operated and the power light is yellow"  
"Yellow?" she frowned

"Yep, yellow means its low princess, just not sure how low."

She shook her head causing her limp hair to fall across her shoulders. "We have to get out of here, we can't stay here." she said weakly. Her body aches were partly from the cold. Though she was layered under four blankets the below zero weather had her shivering fighting to hold onto the warmth. With no food, drink or fire she didn't know how long they would last through the storm. She didn't want to die.

Todd looked over and saw she was coming undone. "It's okay, I will come up with something." Just then the static popped on the radio giving blurbs of a weak transmission trying to break through. Todd smiled and Evangeline looked at him excited "It's working she said excitedly."

Todd turned the dials trying to hone in on the signal getting nothing but static. He picked up the cb receiver and pressed the button on the side "Hello, this is a distress call…Hello any one out there" he said letting go of the button to hear nothing but in static.

"Mayday….mayday…this is a distress call….mayday!" Todd said again hoping for a response.

Evangeline watched holding her breath. He got nothing in return and she was really feeling hopeless from it all. She just couldn't imagine she'd end up here, with her ankle banged up the way it was she was incapable of saving herself and she was almost positive that no one was looking for them. They probably think they were dead.

Todd slammed the receiver down on the table "Damn!" he snapped

Evangeline looked over at him confused "I'm really surprised at you…"

His down due to his growing frustration, caused his long blonde bang to fall in his eyes. Lifting his head slowly he looked over at her "What? Why?"

"Well, if they find us you go to death row Todd. I just would think…"

"That I'd leave you here and try to save my own skin?"

"No I didn't mean…"

Rising from his seat he walked over toward her. "Its okay princess, there is a part of me capable of doing just that. But there's also another part of me…."

Evangeline watched him approach her "Another part?"

Sitting on the bed with her avoiding her foot he reached up and moved her hair from her face "There's another part of me, which protects the people I care about. That will fight to save them with my dying breath" he said in a low whisper.

She stared at him seeing something in his eyes that confused her. His hand stroked the side of her face and then moved down to her neck. She let a breath escape her as his fingers tenderly massaged the back of her neck alleviating some of the pressure from her headache. Evangeline reached and grabbed his wrist to stop the massage, feeling she was enjoying it too much "Todd…"

"You are a remarkable woman…" he said under his breath, his eyes sweeping downward at the voluptuous curves of her breasts defined by the wrap dress she wore.

"I don't…"

"Listen to me, I know you've been through a lot Evangeline. I may not have acknowledged it before due to my own life crises but I saw it all. Your love affair with a man that ran around town chasing that twit can barely recognize her colors without flash cards. I saw you selflessly try to defend her and then help him help her through one crisis after another." He said inching closer staring directly into her eyes that were beginning to pool with tears revealing her pain.

"Worst of all we all witnessed on they day that was supposed to be your day. The day the entire town wanted to say thank you, for all that you do selflessly for us, you get kidnapped. Only to suffer the humiliation of watching as your life slip away the man you love choose another woman all over again…"

"Stop it dammit!" she shouted at him bursting into tears turning her head.

"Evangeline"

"NO! Stop, I don't need you to tell me my life….I lived it!" she said crying, her fear of dying out here alone and the knowledge that he's probably out there not caring if she did took over her. The tears she kept inside gripped her, making the pain so raw she struggled to breathe. Turning her head from him she felt embarrassed at her loss of control and wanted desperately for him to just go away so she could deal the way she always has.

Todd pulled her face back to his forcing her to look at him. "I said all that to say that you have never had a man to stand at your side with the intent of protecting you and only you. At least you never had that in John McBain."

"Todd, I don't want…"  
"You don't want a savior….I know, but princess you so desperately need one." He said smiling at her sweetly.

Evangeline looked at him and her tears stopped. She was so tired of it all. She almost lost her life and now she was stranded with a man sentenced to the fate they avoided. She knew it was their desperation that created the electrical charge in the air drawing them into each other. She knew it and she wouldn't give into it. "I don't know what you want from me…"

"You know what I really want" Todd said moving closer to her.  
Staring in his eyes afraid of what was to come next and weakened by her need for comfort, she shook her head no nervously. He smiled sweetly at her "I want you to lean on me. I want you to believe that we'll survive this because for once there is someone determined to make sure you're okay. I need you to hold on and believe that I'll protect you…"

"Why Todd? Why are you doing this?"

"Because right now I need hope to Evangeline, I need to think of something more than the fact that we are stuck and if we're found, my life is still over. I feel it too…"

"Feel what?" she said weakly

"I feel lost. Together we are just a couple of lost souls. We've loved and committed ourselves to people that were just incapable of doing the same in return. It hurts, and I know that pain you carry. It's like a cancer and it eats away at you slow. At first you don't know the disease is in you and you try to just get on with living, or dying which in my case is why I fought the appeal. But then the cancer spreads and it takes away your hope, your faith that you'll be happy. By the time you know you have it, it's terminal and there's no cure. Am I right?"

Evangeline began to cry and nod. "I love him Todd, I've never stopped and he could never love me. No matter how much I tried to show him my love, he could never love me. Why is that" she asked her body heaving with tears and the pain of her wounds making her tremble.

Todd lifted her chin, bringing his face to hers he kissed her softly on her lips. Evangeline blinked through her tears at him surprised and before she could stop the kiss he lifted his head.

"I don't know why he let you go, just like I don't know why Blaire couldn't believe in us any longer. All I know is that you deserve _devotion_ Princess. It's the only way to be loved…."

John walked out of his bathroom wiping his face with his hand towel. Last night he dreamed of her crash and her screams were with him even now that he was awake. Todd Manning was murdering rapist and if her life depended on him she was in even greater peril than that blizzard could cause.

Images of them being held up in a Ranger Station came to him and his hands began to ball up into fists. If he laid a hand on her or hurt her in anyway, he'd kill him slow. Trying to settle the irrational fear and rage that had a grip on him he finally was able to hear the persistent knocking at his door.

Tossing the hand towel to his bed he grabbed his shirt that lay on the dresser and pulled it over his bare chest heading to answer it. Opening the door without asking who it was he was surprised to see Antonio and Christian. Christian shouldered past him coming inside and John stepped back frowning as Antonio followed.

"The news says that she's dead? The papers say she's dead! What the hell is going on!" Chris said turning around with a mixture of disbelief and grief.  
"She's not" John said dryly closing the door  
"Then you heard differently?" Antonio asked

"Yeah you can say that, she's held up out there and we have to get to her. I don't know how bad she's hurt, but I do know her life may depend on Todd Manning's help and if that's the case the storm isn't the only thing we should be worried about."

"Held where? Todd? Do you think he would hurt her?" Christian snapped frowning.

Before John could speak the phone rang, turning he went to answer it. "Hello"  
"John…." a soft voice came through on the line.  
"Yes, Layla? Is that you?"

"John they keep saying on the news she's dead….when are you going to go look for my sister?" she said crying. Her fears had a hold of her and she'd been unable to sleep all night. Talking to her mom who was now in worse shape than she was, she felt helpless and a sense of dread plagued her thoughts. She needed someone to confirm that her sister would be okay.

John's heart raced at the sound of her tears "Layla, you will have to be strong for me okay"  
"Have they found anything more yet?"  
"Not yet sweetie, but I think I know where she is. I'm going to be heading out soon. I promise you we will find her."

Antonio watched him pacing trying to calm Layla. Christian came up along side of him. "Hey can you call the pilot again bro, I mean we got to get out there, how long do you think she can survive this?"  
"Yeah okay" he said walking away pulling out his phone.

John hung up the phone with Layla and turned around to see Christian watching him. The lack of sleep and his growing anxiety at her being alone with Manning probably had him coming unhinged. Christian saw the dark circles forming under his eyes and the clammy pale look of his skin. "So do you said you knew where she was being held"

John nodded "I think they got out of the plane before it went over the cliff"  
"Wait…what cliff?"  
Shaking his head he headed to his kitchen to pour some coffee to calm his nerves. "I spoke to my contact at the FBI and they said the plane crash landed then went over a cliff. He thinks it's possible she got out before it did so."

"Okay so she's been in this storm?"

John poured the coffee into a cup and turned to look at Christian as he sipped it relishing the strength it gave him. "I don't think so, I think she's found shelter. I have to believe she has. And knowing Manning with the nine lives he has….he's at her side trying to figure out a way to benefit from this situation. He won't protect her in the end. He'll save his own neck so we have to get to her and fast."

Christian let go of a deep sigh. "Evangeline, savior of lost souls." He said sadly. Looking down he thought about how hard she fought for him. How hard she fought for Todd, to have her in your corner touches you deeply. There's no way a man that's had her belief in him would harm her. "Todd won't hurt her"

John slammed the cup on the counter "He's a baby killer!" he hissed  
"Maybe not, do you think she would defend a man that was a baby killer!" Christian snapped.

"She doesn't see it, she believes…."  
"She believes is people that no one believes in" Christian said glaring at him. "She helps those lost, and she gives them hope. Todd won't hurt her, I know it because I've been on the recipient end of that. You claim to love her, you should know this too"

John shook his head, he'd really messed everything up. He just had to find her first and then he could fix it. He would tell her he loved her and they would just move on with their lives. He knew it. Inside he knew she would come back to him. "Maybe, you're right, but on the slightest chance you're not do you want to risk her life?" he said matching Christian's glare.

Antonio who wrapped up his call walked over noticing the tension. John dropped the heated stare with Christian to look at his friend. "What's the word?"

"The pilot says air traffic control will not allow a flight out today. The storm won't break according to them until tonight some time."  
"What! We can't search for a cabin at night!" Christian said shocked  
John looked down at the sink and shook his head "Look man, I would never do this or ask this of you, but I'm desperate."

Antonio shook his head "I have tried John….money won't get us in that sky, nobody will risk their life flying in this, no one but us of course."

John stared at him "You sure about that? You telling me there is nothing you can do? No one else that you call in a favor from?"  
Antonio sucked in his breath "I'll call Jackie, but to deal with him John makes you indebted to people you really don't want to mess with."

"Make the call!" John said staring into Antonio eyes. Antonio saw something in that blue stare that let him know that at this moment he'd sell his soul to the devil for her.

The phone rang again and John went to it feeling a greater sense of relief now that Antonio was employing all tactics to get them in the air.

"McBain here.."  
"John its Bo"  
"Hey Bo, any word on the crash site?" he asked hoping that the rescue teams found something more.

"No they had to come out of the mountains the storm is getting worse. Listen we got another problem"  
"What?"  
"A homicide…"  
"Bo, I don't have time for this…I can't do anything right now but concentrate on Evangeline."  
"This affects her, the person murdered was Spencer Truman."  
John stopped pacing and frowned "Truman?"  
"He was shot to death and I have a witness that says it Margaret Cochran…you need to get to the station now!"

John hung up stunned. Christian walked over to him confused "What now?"  
"I have to go to the station."  
"Is it Evangeline?"  
"I don't know it's like we're in the twilight zone or something!" he said dazed  
Antonio hung up. "Jackie's saying he can get us in the air with a medical helicopter, but he'll need a couple of hours."

John and Christian looked at him relieved. They were finally going to get somewhere. "I'll call my boy back at the bureau, and find out where those stations are, on my way to the police station" he said going to his room to get his shoes and finish dressing.

"The station? Something else with Evangeline?" Antonio asked hopeful  
"Spencer Truman is dead and Bo says Margaret did it, apparently Todd may not have been lying after all." he said turning to get dressed.

Christian and Antonio looked at each other in shocked silence. John was right they were all in the twilight zone, and it was getting worse by the minute.

"Don't worry baby, mommy has a plan" Margaret said looking up into the rearview mirror at the back of the infant seat that was turned facing the backseat. She heard Todd Jr crying and she knew he was tired of the drive.

She had to get to shelter for them, to wait out the storm until its time to go find daddy. She fixed ole Spencer Truman's wagon. Shooting him was fun, if only she could pop a cap in that blonde haired Barbie doll all would be right in the world.

She looked up to see an exit approaching and decided to take it to get out of the storm. The snow was falling harder and she feared getting stuck in it. Turning off the road she drove up to the small Motel 6 that just 20 miles outside of Llanview. Grabbing a hat and a pair of shades she got out locking the baby inside, rushing into the lobby.

She'd taken Spencer's wallet which had roughly $350 inside. The room was $45 and she was grateful for that much. It wasn't long before she was carrying the baby and their things into their new home.

Todd was out there depending on them. They had to be ready to find him when the storm broke. She sat down on the bed and picked up the baby to smile down into his cherub face.

"Mommy, is going to figure this out. We are going to have daddy and the family we all want. I promise you."

Evangeline closed her eyes to the kisses he was applying to the inside of her neck. He pulled her gently down on the bed and moved on top of her carefully as to not hurt her ankle. She felt his hands massaging her breasts and his whispers of how much he wanted her. But it was a lie. He, like John wanted someone else and once again she was allowing a man inside that could never love her just for her.

"Stop…" she moaned as his hand traveled down her hips and his light kisses seared her skin with each gentle passionate kiss. His tongue made contact with her flesh, traveling down to the crease of her breasts and she felt his hand on the tie that held her wrap dress together.

"Todd, please stop!" she said crying

Todd lifted his head and looked into her face. She was so tired she couldn't push him away but her heart just couldn't take anymore. "Please…" she said crying more."

"Shhhh…princess don't cry, I don't want to cause you more pain, I'm sorry."

"I can't…I can't do this again" she whimpered, opening her eyes to look into his. The cut still on his forehead and the bruises fading now in his face didn't conceal his angelic like features and the desire he had in his eyes for her. "I understand…I want you Evangeline, but you need more than this. You need to believe again that someone wants to give you their heart."

She nodded stopping her tears. "You love Blaire, no matter what you two have gone through, you love her. I won't give myself to another man that can't say those words to me"

"I feel…" he said trying to explain

"No! Todd its not me you want, if I give into you where does that leave me? How does that make you any different from John?" she said looking in his eyes angrily.

He kissed her nose and wiped away her tears on her face "I guess it doesn't princess, though I will say that I love Blaire just as you love him, but I no longer want her. I no longer believe that we are soul mates."

Evangeline closed her eyes and shook her head "I'm so tired. I just can't keep doing this. Do you know when I was a little girl I won a spelling bee."

Todd chucked "No kidding?" he said confused by the statement.  
She looked up and smiled "You don't understand, I was 7 and I won the national spelling bee. Spelling words that scholars struggled with."

Todd stared at her not understanding what she was trying to tell him. "That's amazing, but not surprising. Everyone knows of your brilliance princess."

"My dad thought so too. You should have seen the way he celebrated. How he loved me, because I made him proud. The fights between him and my mom stopped. I was able to make them happy because of my accomplishment. I was able to make him love me even more. I can remember being so happy that I made a vow right then and there. I'd do everything above and beyond what was expected of me so he could always look at me that way always."

"That's a heavy burden for a child to carry…"

"Sometimes Todd, in life I feel like that seven year old girl trying to spell the final word that will make him proud. I feel like if I just do what's right and do my very best, I'll be loved. I tried to do my best, for John, Christian, and even you….but I still…" she said her voice cracking.

"Evangeline, you have to know that being a winning attorney and selfless to fault is not the way to win the love you seek. It's not even required, don't you know that?" He asked alarmed by the truth she was revealing but finally understanding her relentless commitment to others.

"Then how? Because my dad's dead, John's gone, Christian can't find a place in the world and you are facing death row. After all of that, I've failed you all…."

"Listen to me, I know a little bit about father's and we love our little girls regardless. Do I hope that Starr turns into the woman you are, of course I do. But will it make me love her more? Not possible. I'm sure that he's as proud of you as he was the day of the spelling bee, its just how daddies are." He said stroking her head.

She nodded listening feeling a sense of relief at his analogy, wanting to believe the words he was saying. Needing some peace from the scars she kept hidden from the world.

Todd looked at her seriously "John McBain, has no love for himself, take it from a man that knows that kind of darkness. He's incapable of the love you seek. So you can keep giving him space and time and he'll keep taking it but he'll never appreciate you princess. He doesn't see you. Not the way I do."

She didn't like his version of John, but she couldn't argue with it. She'd spent the last months watching the man in a relationship with a woman that he kept in between them during the course of their relationship. He took her to bed for Christ sake, while knowing her husband was in prison. She just couldn't deny the fact that she could win a million spelling bee's and John would never love her.

Todd saw her digesting his words and continued to share his wisdom. "Christian Vega is a free man to live and die on his terms because of you. Not only did you save him but you gave him hope."

"What about you?" she asked looking up into his face.

Todd smiled "Me? C'mon princess, you know that I always land on my feet. My guess is right now they are uncovering evidence that will exonerate me!" he said laughing causing her to laugh softly with him.

Leaning down he kissed her again, but it was more than intimacy. It was a kiss of gratitude for just being her, for believing and investing so much of herself in someone as lost as him. Evangeline raised her hand touching his face kissing him back, feeling safe in his arms. She'd shared with him a part of herself she never revealed to anyone and she felt unburdened because of it.

Stopping the kiss he looked at her and smiled "Now, how about I just hold you. We can try the radio again later."

"Okay"  
Todd climbed back in bed under the covers behind her. Kissing the back of her forehead he pulled her back under him. "You're wrong, about not being loved Evangeline….I couldn't love you more than I do now"

She smiled and closed her eyes. His friendship was more than enough. She felt the power of his devotion and finally believed in its sincerity. "Thank you Todd" she whispered relaxing into his arms.

written by tarskeewee08

Back to Index

Chapter 6: Lost Souls 

Bo walked back and forth behind his desk staring at the sketch artists rendering of the woman that called about hearing gun shots. He looked up and smiled at the older woman in her late fifties. The soft gray and brown hair framed the woman's face her glasses sat on the tip of her nose and she was anxiously bouncing her knee and rubbing her hands together, "Who are we waiting for commissioner?" She asked politely looking up at him.

Bo smiled sweetly and took a seat behind his desk, "One of the lieutenants that worked on the murder case of this woman."  
"Murder!" she said shocked.  
"Yes, I'm sure you've heard about the Margaret Cochran murder trial Ms. Tinsley?"  
"Oh yes…" she said nodding her head as the name became more familiar and the specifics of the case became more evident to her.

They both looked up at the knock at the door, "Come in!" Bo called rising from his seat.  
Hugh Hughes walked in his dark pinstriped suit freshly cleaned and his hair slicked back from his face. He looked down at the older woman and then back over at Bo, "What is this about Commissioner. My office got a call from you this morning about a homicide."  
"Yes, excuse us Ms. Tinsley." Bo said as he walked over to the woman and showed her to a small chair where she could wait.

Walking back into his office Bo closed the door and walked around his desk. He picked up the sketch and held it out to Hugh, "Who does this look like to you?" He said staring at him.  
Hugh snatched the sketch and narrowed his eyes onto it. His brow furrowed as he held his breath at the sight before him, "This isn't possible!" Hugh snapped shoving the picture back into Bo's chest. "This is some kind of trick Bo."

Bo shook his head and sat on the edge of his desk. This would never happen with Nora at the helm. He stared at the young acting district attorney looking him up and down, the man was all about justice at no cost and it might have just cost Todd and Evangeline their lives. "It is, and no it isn't some joke. It's Margaret."  
Hugh shook his head and pulled off his glasses. Pinching the bridge of his nose he sat down in the chair and dropped his briefcase onto the floor, "She's dead! We had a damn autopsy and DNA test run dammit!" Hugh snapped.

Bo looked at him and smiled, "Apparently DNA lies, Margaret Cochran is still alive. And your office convicted an innocent man."  
"It may have not been Margaret and her baby he killed but it was some one Bo! Todd maybe innocent of killing Margaret but someone killed that woman and her baby, and my money is still on Todd."  
"You're money and conviction may have sent Todd and Evangeline to their graves."  
"I heard about that on the news this morning I don't understand what happened. How the hell did she get on that plane in the first place?"  
"Court order. You know Evangeline she'll fight for anyone that wants to fight for themselves, and she was determined to get Todd off."

"Was it that lady that gave you that sketch Bo?" He said looking over his shoulder to where Ms. Tinsley sat.  
"Yeah why?"  
Hugh chuckled and slipped his glasses back on, "I can poke all kinds of holes into her testimony Bo and you know that. There is no way Todd can get released based on her id!"

John walked into the police station with Cris and Antonio hot on his heels. He held up his hand as he turned around to stop Cris and Antonio from following him any further, "Let me handle this."  
"What!" They both snapped.  
"You heard me let me handle this. This isn't about Evangeline, it's about Margaret."  
"Margaret! What! She's dead." Cris said staring at John confused.

John shook his head as he placed his hand on Bo's office door, "Apparently she isn't…" he said not convinced of the latest news.

Knocking on the door he heard Bo yell come in and saw Hugh sitting in the chair facing Bo. "Finally John, we've got a problem."  
"You said that. What is this about Margaret being alive?"  
Bo reached behind him and handed John the sketch, he stared at it and started laughing, "What is this!"  
"Someone called in about hearing shots late last night. Because of the crash we were just able to get someone out there early this morning."  
"Okay, so shots fired and what? What am I missing here how did Margaret get involved." John said shaking the picture.

"The officers pounded on the door where the neighbor heard the shots and they didn't get an answer. When they went around to the back of the house and still got no answer the officers were on their way out when one stepped in blood."  
"Spencer's?" John questioned sitting on the edge of the file cabinet.  
"You got that right they broke down the door and found his body sprawled out on the floor, dead. So of course we brought the neighbor in and she gave us that id. She looked out her back window when she heard the shots and saw Margaret leaving."  
"What time was this?"  
"She says around midnight or so why?"  
"Who is this witness Bo?" John questioned walking closer to him.

Hugh looked up at John and smiled, "He's having the same thought as me Bo. There is no way that it's Margaret, no way!"  
Bo walked to the window and pointed to Ms. Tinsley, "Sally Tinsley." He said pointing to the older woman.  
"Hugh could poke all kinds of holes in that Id. She probably couldn't spot an elephant ten feet away Bo!"  
"Are you two serious! Spencer Truman is dead and in some basement where there was baby furniture!" Bo snapped.

John paced the office back and forth. He couldn't handle this right now, his mind was with Evangeline. He needed to find her, not worry about Spencer Truman and Margaret Cochran.

"John look at me! The CSU team found hairs on him, read hairs! They are running DNA right now. If it is indeed Margaret that killed Truman then we sent Manning away to jail for no reason! That means he went to death row for no reason, that means Evangeline was on that flight fighting for Todd when she didn't have to!"

The reality of the situation finally sank in, Bo was right. If Margaret was indeed alive that meant that Todd didn't kill her and his child and Evangeline was right. His stomach tightened at the reality that yet again she was right and because of the job he wouldn't believe her. She never fought a loosing battle unless it was with him. Running a hand over his face John blew out a deep breath and set the sketch on the desk next to him. He grabbed the door and opened it pushing past Antonio and Cristian.

"Excuse me ma'am." He said squatting in front of Ms. Tinsley.  
"Yes sir?" She said looking down at him.  
"Lieutenant John McBain, Ms. Tinsley?"  
"Yes, Sally Tinsley. What can I help you with Lieutenant?"  
John looked back over his shoulder at Cris, Bo, Hugh, and Antonio and back at the woman in front of him, "The description you gave of the woman to the sketch artist how sure of it are you?"  
"Oh one hundred percent Lieutenant, and she had a baby with her. The baby was crying so that was another reason I paid so close attention."  
"But Ms. Tinsley it was dark, it was midnight correct?"  
"Oh yes, but we've had prowlers in the neighborhood so I have flood lights on the back of my house. I saw her clearly when she stepped into that car and put the baby in the backseat."  
"Are you sure, this is crucially ma'am."  
"Yes I'm sure Lieutenant. I have no doubt in my mind, that the description I gave is who I saw." She said annoyed by his persistent questioning of something she knew to be fact.

John stood up and extended his hand, "Thank you ma'am. You have done this city a great service. "he said shaking her hand softly.  
"You're quiet welcome, is that all, am I free to go?" she asked softly through a yawn.

Bo walked up and touched her hand lightly, "Yes you've been a big help thank you Ms. Tinsley."  
"You're quiet welcome." She responded smiling politely.  
"I'll get someone to take you home okay?"  
"That would be nice…"

Bo turned back to John who had his hands on his hips as he paced back and forth in the bull pen. He nodded at one of the officers to take Ms. Tinsley back home and then nodded at John and Hugh to follow him back into his office, "Are you two satisfied now?" Bo said closing the door.  
Hugh and John looked at each other then back at Bo, "I want the DNA results before I even consider asking the court to overturn his conviction."  
"Understandable Hughes, but with this new evidence it's going to be a done deal." Bo said staring at Hugh.  
"It won't do him any good if he's dead."

John turned and glared at Hugh, "She's not dead!" he snapped.  
"I said he, not she… Chill out McBain."  
"John…" Bo said softly as he touched John's back, "Calm down. They will find her."  
"I'll find her!" he yelled walking out the office and slamming the door.

Hugh looked at Bo and then back at the door that was still rattling, "What was that all about? I thought they were over."  
"Not to him they aren't. He's on the edge of the cliff with this whole plane crash thing and what you said and the idea that Todd is dead meaning that so is Evangeline might push him right over."  
"He still cares?"  
"More than I think anyone knows." Bo said shaking his head back and forth.

Starr walked down the hall still in her pajamas last night was one of the worst of her life, hearing about the possibility that her father could be dead rocked her to the core. She cried herself to sleep last night as she replayed over and over again the last time she saw Todd in the jail right before the verdict was announced. She needed her father as much as he needed her and now her mother didn't believe that Todd was still alive.

Stopping at the door to her parent's bed room she rested against the door jam and looked at her mom's shaking body, shaking from her sobs and the devastation that her father could be gone. Shaking her head Starr pulled at her hair as she walked into the room, "He'll come back to us mom." She said crawling into the bed next to her.

Blair turned over and wiped at her eyes, smiling softly at her daughter she saw so much of Todd in her, she really was his daughter thru and thru. Blair threw her arms around Starr holding her close as both girls cried against each other, "He'll come back to us…" Starr said through her sobs.

Blair tried to believe in her words, to believe that Todd wouldn't leave like that, not without knowing that she did in fact love him and could and would never want to stop. She wanted desperately for him to walk through that door, to get a phone call that they found Todd alive and well and he was going to fight the conviction in appeal.

Todd looked down at a sleeping Evangeline and kissed the side of her face as he ran his hand along the soft curve of her hips. Sliding out of the bed from behind her he moved slowly through the small ranger station and to the desk where the radio sat. He had to figure out a way to get in contact with someone. They weren't going to last much longer out here alone, cold, wet, and hungry.

Sitting down he pushed his hair out of his face and winced at the pain in his head and from the dimming bruises on his face and body. He was sore all over and just wanted a hot bath to soothe away all the aches, pains and images from the past few days.

He looked over at his sleeping princess, and vowed again that he would get them out of their safe and sound and protect her from anyone that wanted to hurt her, including McBain. She would fight for the both of them to get out of prison and back home to his children. They were the only ones that mattered right now, Spencer could have Blair she didn't believe in him and he couldn't be with anyone that didn't believe in him.

Turning he smiled softly at Evangeline careful of his cuts, now she was someone he could fall for. Beautiful, intelligent, kind, caring and forceful, a force to be reckoned with, but all at the same time so innocent and vulnerable. She tried to hide that side of herself from the rest of the world but from him, she let it out. McBain had messed up and there was no way he would let John back in, to just break her heart again. That damn "niece" of his, more like a child actually. Shaking his head Todd turned back to the radio and began messing with it.

"If MacGyver can do this, then I sure as hell can!" Todd snapped trying to concentrate on the radio.

Evangeline moaned and groaned in her sleep. The rocking of the plane became more forceful and all she could do was scream Todd's name over and over again in her sleep. Her body shook with the same fear she had the night of the crash and she cried out in her sleep. Todd dropped the radio and rushed to her side, "It's okay princes… I'm right here." He said stroking the side of her face.

Evangeline blinked and opened her teary eyes, "Oh god…" she moaned coming out of the dream.  
"You okay?" he asked smiling.  
Looking down at his smiling face Evangeline nodded, "I'm good, you're here so I'm good." She said closing her eyes again. "Stay with me…"  
"Always." He said crawling back behind her. The radio could wait, not for much longer but it could wait. Right now she needed him and he promised to always be there when she needed him, because she was always there when he needed her.

Todd wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her close as Evangeline turned around in his hold and moved down to rest her head on his chest. Todd maneuvered so that she was on top careful of her wrist and ankle and pulled the covers tighter around them. Her body shook trying to stay warm and he held her tighter as he inhaled the soft scent of her hair. Amazingly so it still smelled of the lavender shampoo she used. Todd's eyes fluttered close as he felt her relax in his embrace. Someone had to find them and soon.

Antonio and Cris followed John to the diner afraid to say anything. John lost in thought pulled out his cell phone when it started to ring, "McBain." He said sitting in a booth solemn.  
"Hey man it's Wess."  
John perked up at hearing his voice, "Tell me you know something man!"  
"I know something. Listen I got a list and map of the ranger stations. The closest one that is still manned right now is about fifteen miles from the crash site. There are about twenty other stations that they could have disappeared into."  
"Twenty what! You've got to be kidding me man…" John slouched into the booth and shook his head at both Antonio and Cris.

"If you guys get up there now you should be able to find them by night fall. Most of the stations are pretty close to each other, it's a matter of miles in between them."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yeah, if you have access to a computer I can send you the map of them and you can get started. But you have to keep this under wraps man, if my superiors find out that I'm helping you and interfering in their investigation they will have my hide." Wess said frowning into the phone.  
John nodded and looked at Antonio, "You got it man. Send it to my email I'll pull it up and print them out. I owe you man. I owe you her life…" he said in all honesty.  
"Hey you were desperate man."  
"More than you know Wess, more than you know…" snapping the phone shut he set it on the table.

"Well, what's going on bro!" Antonio said anxiously.  
"We need access to a computer. That was my contact he sent us the list and location of the ranger stations near where the plane crashed. It's our only hope in finding them."

The boys jumped out of their seats and raced back over to Antonio's place. As they pushed open the door John jumped right on to the computer. Cris and Antonio paced back and forth waiting for John to log on and check his email. Sitting right there was the way to bring Evangeline back to him.

"So Evangeline might be in one of those stations huh?" Cris said looking over John's shoulder.  
"That's what my contact says."  
"He better be right or I'll hunt him down and teach him a little lesson." Cris said with a clenched jaw.  
"You'll have to get through me first." John said looking up at Cris.  
Cris smiled and shook his head, "You really do care about her don't you?"  
"I do…"  
"What took you so long to realize this McBain, I mean no offense but you dumped her for Natalie."  
"She dumped me, trust me I would never have dumped her but she was sick and tired of me not telling her how I felt."  
"Why is that man?"  
John shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, "I don't know. It's not like I didn't love her, I just hate being shoved into a corner."  
"Evangeline doesn't seem like the type to shove McBain."  
"That's how I felt man… I can't explain it, but now that I can say it, I plan on telling her that over and over again."

Cris took a step back and leaned against the couch, "So let me get this straight, you actually think that telling her that you love her is going to wipe the slate clean?"  
"Yeah, why not?"  
Cris shook his head and lowered it laughing to himself, "Okay man… whatever."  
John looked up at him confused. Of course she would take him back like that, all she wanted was the words and now he could say them and more.

"Really!" Antonio said with the cell pressed to his ear.  
Cris looked up at him confused. "We can get in the air. "Antonio said in a whisper pulling the phone from his ear.  
"What!"  
"You heard me…" he said rolling his eyes and putting the phone back to his ear.  
"Yeah, thanks man. We'll be right there." Snapping his phone shut Antonio's face lit up and he hugged Cristian, "We're going to bring her home man." He said hugging Cristian.

John came walking out staring at the maps trying to figure out the best place to start looking for her when they could get up in the air, "I think we should start going west from the plane crash. I don't know why, I just have this feeling that Manning took her west." John said shaking his head.

"Bro!" Antonio said excitedly.  
"Yeah man…" he said staring down at the maps.  
"We can get in the air."  
"What!"  
"We can get in the air man. We can bring her home." Cris said smiling.

He felt his heart start to beat again. Just the idea that they could get in the air now and officially start looking for her was overwhelming. John's heart raced as he grabbed his jacket and followed Antonio and Cristian out of the apartment hopeful that they would find them safe and sound.

Lantana Mountain

The helicopter that Jackie had gotten for Antonio, Cris and John landed swiftly in the clearing next to one of the main ranger stations. They all looked out the window seeing a Forest ranger standing outside in his deep green down coat holding his hand onto his head. John was the first one out of the helicopter as he walked up to the Ranger extending his hand, "John McBain…" he said shaking his hand.

The ranger looked at his extended hand and placed his hand into Johns, "Ranger Douglas…" he said eyeing Antonio and Cris as they came off the helicopter. "And who are you two." He said narrowing his eyes.  
"Antonio Vega, my brother Cristian." Antonio said eyeing the ranger.

"You guys don't look like no cops." He said looking back over at John  
"I'm a cop…"  
"Where's your badge!" he snapped. No one came into his forest with a helicopter searching his woods for some convicted criminal and a pretty lady lawyer. If they were really cops they would have come in a police helicopter not a medical one. Taking John's badge he looked at it and back at John. Ranger Douglas shoved the badge back at John and then looked at Antonio and Cristian from under the brim of his cap, "You two, who are you?"

"They're with me Ranger Douglas. Listen I'm not here to play games with you. There are two people someone on this mountain and I have no idea what kind of condition they are in! Either help us or move out of the way." John snapped.

His face beet red from embarrassment Ranger Douglas turned back and headed into the main station. "We have a map of stations that are abandoned this time of year, can you point us toward this one." John said looking down at the maps.

Ranger Douglas slipped off his coat and set his hat on his desk, "You don't wanna go there." He said looking at the place John was pointing to on the map.  
"Why the hell not!" Cris snapped. " I think this guy is playing some game McBain. Let's just go sure ourselves."  
John looked up at Cris and back at Ranger Douglas who had a smug look on his face, "Antonio what do you think?"  
"Ranger what can you tell us. We need to find them."  
"Well I can tell ya they aint there." He said leaning back in his chair and rocking back and forth.  
"Then where the hell are they!" John snapped getting short with him.

Ranger Douglas took John's map and looked them over, "We got some transmission or something from some where in this area." He said running his fingers around a few of the stations.  
"You what!" John snapped.  
"Yeah, didn't think much of it, we didn't hear anything just some static and pinpointed the signal to this area."

John grabbed the maps and glared at the Ranger. He pushed past Antonio and Cris and out into the world. He nodded at the pilot and pulled his coat tight as they headed out in the direction that the ranger pointed out on the map.  
"Can you believe that guy!" Antonio said as they hiked threw the forest.  
"I know, what the hell was his problem?" Cris asked as they came up on the first station.

John prayed silently and pushed the door open only to be completely devastated from her or Todd not being there. They went through each of the stations on the map in the area that Ranger Douglas.

Out of breath and exhausted from their hike they all slid down a few of the trees pushing his hair out of his face. Sitting with his knees bent against his chest John panted as he stared at Antonio and Cris doing the same thing. He couldn't bare this any more they were out there for what felt like hours on end and they were still no closer to finding her.

Time was running short and John could see the sun setting behind the trees. He hit his head on the tree and stared at the ceiling of trees hovering above him. All he wanted was to find her, bring her home and show her how much he loved her. He needed that now, he needed her now. Lowering his head he saw the outline of another station a few hundred feet away.

Pushing up with all of everything left in him John trudged through the brush toward it with Antonio and Cris panting heavily behind him. Falling against the door with a thud he took a deep breath and prayed that she was in there safe and sound.

As John pushed the door open his heart sank, it shattered into a million pieces. "Shit…" Cris mumbled coming up behind him.  
Antonio stood on the other side of John staring at the scene in front of him. He looked at John's face bright red and just missed him as he ran into the station yanking Todd off the bed.

The site of him holding onto Evangeline like he was her lover tore him up inside. No one put their hands on her like that. Todd yelled as he felt his body being pulled from the cot. "What the hell!" He screamed as he felt his head hit the concrete ground beneath him.  
Evangeline sat up staring at Antonio and Cris standing at the door as John pounced on Todd losing control over his rage at seeing Todd's hands all over her.

"JOHN!" She screamed. He didn't respond as Antonio and Cris finally jumped into action and pulled John off of Todd. His face tight with rage and red with anger John grunted loudly fighting to get out of Antonio's and Cris's hold.

Evangeline fell to the ground touching Todd's face as he looked up at John, heated. "What the hell is your problem!" she snapped as she cradled Todd in her lap weary of her wrist and ankle that still seared with pain.

"He had his hands were all over you." John said fighting to get free of Antonio and Cris.  
"Chill man!" Cris snapped.  
"Yeah come on we found them…"  
"He had his hands were all over you…" John seethed as he finally calmed down some.

Antonio and Cris let John go as he bent over panting and glaring at Todd, "I was keeping her warm man, not that I need to explain myself to you." Todd said heated.  
"Todd Manning you're under arrest." John said breathing heavily.  
"For what!" Evangeline snapped glaring at John. She tried to stand put fell back from the pain that shot through her leg. Howling in pain Evangeline collapsed to the ground and John rushed to her side, "What's wrong…" he said staring down at her.

"My leg dammit…" she cried holding in her tears. She wasn't going to let him see her cry again. Todd looked over at Evangeline and crawled over to her, "You okay princess?"  
"I need a doctor…" she said looking up at him with a small smile on her lips.  
"You heard the woman McBain, quit your pussy footing and get the woman to a doctor." He hissed.  
John stared at Todd and then back at Evangeline. He watched as Manning rose and then reached down to help Evangeline from the floor. She pushed from John's hands and held onto Todd's hand as he scooped her up into his arms. John looked at them shocked and unable to speak.

"Hey boys, thanks for coming to find us." Todd said passing Antonio and Cris.  
They stood motionless as Todd stepped out into the cold weather, "Are we just going to stand around or get us home."  
"She's going home, you're going back to prison."  
"He didn't do it!" Evangeline hissed glaring at John.  
He shook his head and rose from the floor and followed Antonio and Cris out of the station. They stepped in front of Todd and led them out of the forest.

John looked at the small cot that they had slept on and felt his heart break and his mind race, "She wouldn't…" he said shaking his head. "She loves me…"

The media circled the bottom of the hospital as the helicopter landed and Michael came out with a gurney for Evangeline. She rolled her eyes as they placed her own it and raced her back down stairs into the hospital. Todd followed in a pair of John's hand cuffs with John holding him by the arm. She hadn't spoken to him the whole ride back to Llanview but she talked with Cris, Antonio and Todd as they flew through the sky. Even after a plane crash she was magnificent. He wanted to reach out and touch her, feel her skin on his, her hair flow through his fingers but he kept his hands to himself.

It ate away at him with the idea that she might have slept with Manning. After all this time, she gives up just like that. John gripped his chest as they rode down in the elevator together with Evangeline and she held on to Todd's hand. He swallowed the lump in his throat as Todd leaned over and kissed her lightly on the forehead pushing her hair from her face as they came to the prison ward floor.

Michael watched the scene unfold and saw how tight his brothers hands were in fists and how tightly clenched his jaw was, "I'll be back to see about you okay. We need to talk." He said finally touching her hand.  
"Sure…" Evangeline said softly looking away.

Michael took her down a few more floors and pushed her out of the elevator to awaiting nurses and they got her hooked up and checked over. A few X-rays on her ankle and wrist showed a sprained ankle and a fractured wrist. It had to have a cast put on and they wanted to keep her for observation for a few nights to keep an eye on her mild concussion and mild hypothermia.

Finally warming up from the feeling of being cold for the past night Evangeline settled into the bed as waiting for someone to come and set her wrist. The pain medicine was a godsend and she stared out the window wondering what they were doing to Todd. The door opened and Michael smiled coming in, "You gave us quite a scare there E." He said smiling.  
She smiled and shifted uncomfortable in the bed, "Is Todd okay?"  
"He's fine, a few minor cuts and bruises as well as a mild case of hypothermia, but all in all he's okay."  
"Good." She said blowing a sigh of relief.  
"How are you handling things?"  
"Nervous, scared, relieved to be home, thankful that I didn't give up. Grateful that Todd was around to keep me sane."  
"You two seem to have gotten closer, he asked about you while I was checking up on him."  
"Yeah I guess…"  
"Okay, well there are some people here to see you, you up for it?"  
Nodding she smiled and pulled the coves up with her free hand. Michael turned and opened the door to Layla, Bo, Antonio, and Cris. She smiled at her sister as she came rushing into her side and hugged her tightly tears pouring down both of their faces.

John stood outside of her room waiting for his turn to talk to her. He wanted his time alone to tell her how he'd felt for so long and hoping that they could get back together and work through their problems. When he had left Todd's room Todd said to tell his princess that he was okay, and he was ready to fight. Little did Todd or Evangeline know that they wouldn't have to fight very hard, if the DNA test came back the way that he guessed Todd would be a free man in no time.

As the people filed out of the room John looked up anxious to go inside. He walked over to Layla slowly and she smiled at him, "Thank you for bringing my sister home." She said smiling at John as she hugged her body.  
He shook his head and smiled at her, "I promised you Layla that I would bring her home."  
"Thank you so much…. We both owe you so much."  
"You owe me nothing." He said shaking her head. "Can I see her?"  
"She said she was tired and just wanted some sleep."  
"Oh okay…" he mumbled.  
"I'm sure she'll want to thank you, just give her some time to rest and recuperate,"  
"I can do that…" he said smiling at her. John watched her go and stood outside of Evangeline's door debating whether to go in or not. He looked at her sleeping peacefully and went in to keep her company incase she needed him.

Blair had gotten the news that Todd was alive as soon as they helicopter hit the hospital. She told Starr to stay home and she for once agreed with out much debate. Standing outside his door Blair's hand shook as it hovered over his hospital door.

She pushed it open to see Todd hooked up to monitors and asleep. Looking down at the man she would always love she smiled as she crossed the room to him. Touching his face softly Blair pushed his hair out of his face and heard him moan, "Princess…"

Blair looked at him curiously he had never called her princess before. She sat on the edge of the bed and lightly kissed his lips. He was home and they would fight together to clear his name, and get them back to being a family.

Todd turned over and let his eyes flutter open, "Blair…" he choked out.  
"Hey you…" she said softly holding his hand that was handcuffed to the bed.  
"What are you doing here?"  
"I came to see about you. I knew it." She said leaning in to kiss him again.  
Todd turned his head and stared out the window, "Get out." He snapped.

John watched as she turned in the bed almost thrashing. He heard her whimper and rushed to her side, "Hey… It's okay I've got you." He said softly holding her.  
"Todd…" She cried burying her head into his chest.  
The pain ripped through him and his stomach tightened at the mention of his name. Evangeline pulled back and brushed her hair out of her face, "John…." She said looking up at him.  
"Hey you…"  
"What are you doing here!" she said nervously and pushing away from him.

John watched her retreat and it hurt just as much as her saying another man's name in her sleep. "I need to tell you something." He said softly touching her face.  
Evangeline turned her head and John turned it back to him, "First are you okay?"  
"What?"  
"I asked if you were okay… I need to know that you are okay first."  
"I'm fine John thanks to Todd. He saved my life."  
"Good…." He said ignoring the Todd comment, "There has been something I've need to say for the longest time Evangeline." He said reaching for her hand.

She tried to pull away but he held it tightly, "Don't push me away, we've both done that enough for a life time. I need you in my life, I want you in my life."  
"Excuse me." She said shocked still trying to pry her hand from his.  
He smiled softly, "I know this is weird right, but…." He looked around the room and took a deep breath, "You said you needed the words."  
"What words?" she asked confused, even though she knew where this was leading but she didn't want it this way.  
"I love you, I know I never said it when we were together when you need the words, you need me to say the words. I tried to show you in so many ways but… god this is so hard." He said pulling away and walking the room. John turned to look at her, "I love you and I want you back, I want to make things right between us. Can you give me another chance?" he said begging now.

Evangeline stared at him in shock. The words, the ones she had dreamed to hear for years had just came out of his mouth and he was begging for another chance for them. She shook her head sadly and held her left hand to her chest as the tears began to fall. John watched her reaction for a glimmer of hope but all he saw in her eyes was….

By: oltlfantimes10

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Chapter 7: Lost Souls 

Evangeline stared at him in shock. The words, the ones she had dreamed to hear for years had just came out of his mouth and he was begging for another chance for them. She shook her head sadly and held her left hand to her chest as the tears began to fall. John watched her reaction for a glimmer of hope but all he saw in her eyes was…disbelief.

"I don't believe you." she said shaking her head slowly battling the heartache that was beginning to resurface.

"Baby, listen.." he said reaching for her hand.

"No!" she said snatching away. "You have done so many things over the past eight months. Enough to make it painfully clear that you aren't the man I thought I fell in love with. I won't let you hurt me again!"

John sat back stunned. He always had her faith in him. She believed in him when he didn't believe in himself. Something about her had changed. "What happened with you and Todd in that cabin?" he asked in an angrily.

Evangeline looked back into his eyes confused "What?"

"You heard me, I saw you two. He took advantage of you, didn't he? What did he do?"

"That's what this is about isn't it? You're jealous of a man comforting me, so you figure you'd say what you think I need to hear and I'll just fall in line!" she said her eyes brimming with tears.

John shook his head "Let me tell you something about feelings…." He said rising and coming to the bed sitting on the edge so he could be close to her. She moved over painfully and he leaned in putting his hands on either side of her.

"The day I knew I loved Evangeline Marie Williamson, started as a normal uneventful day. You see, I'd been waiting on a phone call from you all day long. You were off on a case and I was milling around my ratty hotel room trying to find something to occupy my time. So I went to get a movie and ran into Natalie. That's right I ran into her and offered for her to come upstairs and watch the movie with me…."

"I don't want to hear this" Evangeline said sucking her teeth.

"Too bad sweetness because you're going to hear it." He snapped. "That day Natalie and I played a little truth and dare game. She was to tell me something I didn't know. You want to know what she told me?"

Evangeline smirked "Let me guess, she told you she was still in love with you?"

John smiled at her sarcasm. "Close, actually I forget her words exactly, but it was about that. You see we weren't official Van, there was no strings or commitments between us. I was free to act and do whatever I pleased. This was before I knew that Christian was alive. This was before I knew that you were on your way upstairs with a bottle of champagne for us. When you arrived and saw her in my room and fled from me, I felt a sense of desperation and fear that I'd never felt before. You left my side and I couldn't take it, not for a moment."

Evangeline couldn't look at him. His words cut into her chest and weakened her resolve. Todd said he was incapable of the love she needed. She believed that, but she also believed he was incapable of intentionally hurting her, if he was saying all of this it had to mean something.

"When I got back to my room and heard that message from you stating you needed more, than a causal affair I knew it then. I had fallen and fallen hard. Strings wasn't about making it exclusive, Strings was just my attempt to tie you to my heart."

John reached and touched her face bringing it back to his. "When I say I love you I mean it. And here's another thing for you to mill over, it's far from over between us. I'll never let you go…"

She pushed his hand away. "Do you know what it's like to see your life flash before your eyes?"" she asked glaring at him.

"No, baby I've been in peril but nothing as traumatic as what you experienced." He said softly searching her face wanting to touch her again. She was alive and right before him and he needed to feel her.

"The first time I thought I was going to die, there was a blazing fire at my feet and the man that I loved risked my life to save another. To save the life of a woman he flaunted around town in my face with no care for how much it hurt me."

John swallowed at her bringing up the KC case. She said she forgave him for that, forgiven him for it all. "You said you understood."

"I thought I did John, truth be told all this time I thought you loved me, but chose Natalie because you were afraid and in denial of that love."

He nodded "That's right Van, I was…."

"Not true, see I was once again thrown in peril and another man showed me what devotion is. Todd could have left me to die. He could have escaped and saved himself. Instead he freed me and walked for miles in a blinding snow storm just to keep me safe."

It was impossible for him to listen to her speak of another man doing what he wanted to do. He heard something in her voice that indicated that she'd let Todd in, she'd given him access to her heart and that was his dammit! "I'm grateful to Todd Van, I really am…"

"Let me finish!" she snapped "It wasn't the rescue that showed me devotion. It was his genuine efforts to listen to me, to see me, to comfort me, to hold me, to talk to me, to just be there for me. I'd forgotten that a man could or would do those things. I forgot what it was like to have a man concerned with only me…"

"You're kidding right?" John stood angry at what she was saying. Heartbroken to hear her say it. "You're talking about Todd Manning! Even if he did sacrifice to save you, he'd never be devoted to you. He's maniacal when it comes to Blaire. You could never be first with him!" he snapped at her. She was killing him saying that Todd Manning of all people was a better man than him.

Evangeline wiped at her tears with her good hand "Then that's really sad, because even though he loves another, he treated me in 24 hours better than you did in a year! Now get the hell out!"

"What?" he asked hurt turning around to look at her shocked.

"You heard me. It's not enough. I believe that in your own way you love me, but it's the love that you offer on your terms. The love that I can have for a moment until that bimbo stumps her toe and you have to run to her rescue. I won't let you back in on those three words and you are an arrogant asshole to think that, that's all it takes!" she said rolling over putting her back to him.

"Evangeline, baby please….listen to me! No matter what happened between you and Todd, nothing can compare to what we share. I know you feel it and you want it. I will prove to you that you need it. Because we're under each other skin, we're apart of each other. We're soul mates." He said softly to her back

Evangeline looking at the window to the side of her bed cried saying nothing. She so desperately wanted him back. But she no longer believed in them. This was just him being jealous and marking his territory. He was breaking her heart by just being here.

John turned to leave. Before reaching the door he looked back at her "I do love you, and I know you know that. I mean it when I say I'm not going anywhere."

Stepping out in the lobby he saw Natalie standing next to the nurses station. Frowning he walked over to her immediately. "What the hell are you doing here?" he said grabbing her arm and dragging her to the elevator.

"Evangeline was found, I was worried." she said weakly her blue eyes watering.  
John let her go. "She's fine Natalie, just go."  
"Are you okay?" she asked touching his face.  
He pushed her hand away. "No, don't do that. You have no place here and I want you to leave now."

"John my place is with you. I see that now. I was wrong to push you away." She said reaching up and running her finger across the necklace she gave him for Christmas. He'd forgotten that he still wore it. Evangeline must have seen it on his neck earlier, making him the biggest hypocrite in her eyes.

Reaching behind his neck he undid the clasp and pulled the silver chain, holding the dime shaped medal, away. Taking her hand he turned it over and lowered the necklace inside her palm. "I was wrong to hide the information about your husband. I was wrong to sleep with you, and I was wrong to make you think that what we have was love. Because it never was, not even close."

Natalie sucked a breath and shook her head back and forth sadly "We've loved each other for over three years. From the moment you put a pool stick in my hand. We've been in the most dangerous of predicaments and survived it all. It was always about love John."

John sighed "'Natalie it wasn't. I'm going to find out what it was though. I'm going to find out why I purposefully hurt the people that care for me. And when I find out I'm going to go back to her and throw myself at her feet. Because she is my yesterday, today and tomorrow." He said kissing Natalie on the forehead, then turning to walk away.

Natalie burst into tears. "John! Do you love her!" she asked her voice cracking under the weight of his words.

John stopped at Natalie's question. Looking back over his shoulder, he saw a woman he genuinely did care for crying as they ended whatever codependent bond they shared. "I love her with everything in me Natalie." He said and smiled apologetically, before walking away.

Natalie covered her mouth shaking her head. "No…."

"Goodbye…." He said leaving

"John no! You don't mean it! No!" she shouted loudly.

Todd turned over and let his eyes flutter open, "Blair…" he choked out.  
"Hey you…" she said softly holding his hand that was handcuffed to the bed.  
"What are you doing here?"  
"I came to see about you. I knew it." She said leaning in to kiss him again.  
Todd turned his head and stared out the window, "Get out." He snapped.

Blaire sat up straight. "What?"

Todd looked at her "I don't want you here, and since you're famous for walking away. Do me a favor and fast forward to that part now!"

"Todd, I believe in you…."  
"Do you really? What do you believe Blaire?" Todd asked looking into her face.  
Blaire's bottom lip began to quiver. "I believe that you're innocent and I want to help you prove it…."

"What does Spencer think about this? You know this epiphany you had?" he said sitting up some his arm clanking in the handcuffs that kept him locked to the sides of the bed.

"Todd don't"  
"Did you sleep with him?" Todd asked not able to disguise his hurt behind the question.  
Blaire moved away from the bed nervously "No, of course not…" she said in a weak voice avoiding his eyes.

"You did sleep with him didn't you? I was facing death row and you were screwing the man that put me there!" he hissed

She turned around shocked "That's a lie! Spencer has been nothing but a friend to me. He testified for you for Christ sake."

Todd snickered "And I bet your panties got wet after that!"

"Todd please….."

"Get out! Go back to being the whore that you've mastered so well. I no longer believe in the lie we share!" he said looking away.

"Lie? What is wrong with you? You love me! You love me dammit!"

John pushed open the door to hear Blaire screaming at Todd. Todd looked at him then turned on Blaire "I am no longer in love with you. Loving you is too damn hard. You don't give the type of devotion and commitment you expect in return. Not like…."

"Like Evangeline would" John asked heatedly moving to the bed. "Funny you chose the words, devotion and commitment, she used them too."

Blaire looked at John through her tears, confused "Evangeline?"

"Tell her Todd, tell her how devoted you were to her when you and Evangeline were trapped together! How committed you now claim to be to my lady." John said his hands in his pockets balled into fists as he tried to steady his breathing.

Todd smiled "How is my princess, she asking for me?"  
John stopped at the way he taunted him and resisted the urge to snap his neck.

Blaire looked down at Todd confused. He said the word princess in his sleep, she thought it was in reference to her or Starr. Not Evangeline. "What's going on with you and Evangeline?" she asked her heart beating frantically in her chest.

"What the hell do you care!" he shouted at Blaire.  
"Todd I love you!" Blaire said going to the side of the bed reaching for his hand.

Todd shot up in the bed screaming through his tears, yanking with both hands locked in handcuffs, almost ripping the side bars off the edges of his bed "GET OUT! GET THE HELL OUT NOW!"

Blaire saw rage and disgust on his face. She also an extreme amount of pain, and she couldn't take it any longer. Grabbing her purse and coat she fled the room.

John remained rooted in the same spot struggling to breathe through this own anger, trying to get his emotions under control. Todd Manning was a disgusting animal and he took advantage of her when she was most vulnerable. Part of him wanted to draw his gun and pump him full of holes.

Todd saw the angry jealous look on John's face and laughed even though tears rolled down his face, from the pain of Blaire's betrayal. Her sleeping with Spencer was the last straw. He could smell him on her. "Let me guess, you ran to her side and she told you to get lost!"

"What did you do to her!" he said through his teeth taking his hands out of his pockets. Each step he took toward him fueled his need to finish what he started, when they were in the cabin.

"What happened between me and Evangeline, is between me and Evangeline. I will tell you this. I plan to protect her from you. Gone are the days of you sandwiched between a child and a woman. You couldn't make a choice McBain? That's cool, I made it for you."

That was it John rushed his bed and forced Todd back down holding him by the throat. "I thought she may have slept with you, but I see now she'd never let you touch her like that. I also see your pathetic attempts to manipulate and control her, like you do Blaire. Look in my eyes Todd, look closely….."

Todd looked up into his blue eyes that began to darken to a deep sapphire blue and sparkle with malice and fierce fiery determination. He struggled to breathe under the choke hold, yanking at his constraints.

The side of John's mouth curled up into a crooked sly smile "You paying attention Manning, because I'm going to say this once. I'll never let you hurt her, and you'll never replace me in her heart. So while you're bunk mates with some man named Bubba, you reflect on this moment and understand your place. Because I'll kill you with my bare hands before you take her away from me!"

"John!" Bo said coming in the room.

John let go of Todd's throat and looked back. Bo and Hugh came into the room shocked at the scene they stumbled on.

"Police harassment!" Todd coughed out. "Arrest him, you saw it! I feel like Rodney King!"

John stood up not sure of what came over him. "Bo, Hugh what are you two doing here?"

Hugh walked over to John "I saw that McBain and you were way out of line!"

John smirked raising his eyebrow. "Me and Manning were just catching up"

"That's not what it looked like to me." Hugh snapped.

"Since when did you care? Didn't you send him to death row?"

Bo came in and stepped up between the men. "Cool it now!"

Todd looked at Bo and Hugh confused "What the hell do all of you want? Get out!"  
Hugh chuckled "I think you'd like to hear what we have to say."  
"I don't think so…besides anything you need to say you can say to my attorney."  
"Evangeline won't be representing him anymore!" John snapped  
Todd looked at John as if he was on fire "Are you nuts!"

"Everybody cool it!" Bo shouted.

Hugh walked over closer to the bed. "Some things have come to the attention of my office since your accident."

"What things?"  
"Margaret Cochran for starters."  
Todd smirk faded and he looked at the ADA with pure hatred in his eyes. "I didn't kill her dammit! I wish you back off! You got your damn conviction what the hell else do you want!"

"We know, Margaret is alive."

John looked at Hugh shocked and Todd was stunned into silence. Bo walked over to Todd. "She's not only alive, she killed Spencer Truman."

"Truman's dead?" Todd asked surprised. "Margaret's alive and she killed Truman?" the gravity of his words rocked Todd to the core. In his wildest nightmares he never imagined that Margaret was alive.

"Yeah…" Hugh said. "Apparently he had her held up somewhere and my guess is when she thought you died in that plane crash she went nuts and killed him."

John shook his head in disbelief "What evidence do you have to support this?"  
Hugh laughed "I understand your distrust John, trust me I'm in shock myself. I mean I almost sent a innocent man to the electric chair."

"WHAT EVIDENCE DAMMIT!" John shouted, angry that Todd could actually walk away again.

"DNA, hair samples, blood, even fingerprints all over that basement apartment. But more conclusively she's been spotted again at a Motel 6 twenty miles outside of town, our boys got there too late so she's out there alright."

Todd shook his head. He knew Spencer set him up but he always thought that Margaret was dead. "What about the baby?" Todd asked

"She has the baby with her…." Hugh said

Todd closed his eyes as the weight of the news sunk in.  
John ran his hand through his hair nervously. "This is unbelievable…."

Bo nodded "Yeah, it may be, but its true. Todd Manning a motion has been filed for a reversal of your conviction. Soon you will be a free man. However, you and everyone you love is at risk now. It's in your best interest to work with the LPD to capture her. Are we clear?"

Todd smiled and looked over at John. John saw him wink and wanted to punch him in his face. Todd then turned and looked at Bo his smile even wider "Yes sir!"

Evangeline heard her door push open. Still crying she shook her head "John please go!"

"It's not John sweetie"

Turning around she saw Nora in a wheel chair. Her heart exploded with joy. "NORA!" she screamed in amazement.

Nora smiled at her "Hey you…"  
"What? When?"

"Long story, how are you feeling?" she asked wheeling herself over closer to the bed.

Evangeline sat up. The new cast on her wrist helped her be more agile and the medication all but killed the pain in her ankle. She had a bandage on the side of her face where the bruise was but she was lucky to be alive

Tears came down her face "Nora, I've missed you so much" she said unable to stop her tears. Nora reached for her hand and squeezed it. "I felt it Van, you and Matthew constantly pulling at me. It was you that brought me back."

Evangeline shook her head through her tears "I don't understand."  
"The crash…I saw it while in my coma. I saw you sweetie and I felt your fear."  
"How is that possible Nora?"  
"I don't know, but it's possible and I'm glad for it, because I was able to help in bringing you back to us"

"It was awful, I thought we were going to die"  
"We?" Nora asked confused  
"Me and Todd, he saved my life."

Nora let go of her hand and sat back in her wheel chair frowning at the way Evangeline smiled at the mention of Todd Manning's name. Nora despised Todd and thought him to be a very dangerous man. She didn't know she was trapped with him. "Did he hurt you?"

Evangeline shook her head "God no…He saved me Nora, he pulled me from that wreckage and carried me to shelter. He nursed my wounds and held me through the night."

"Held you?" she said disgusted  
Evangeline smiled "Not like that, but yes it was intimate. It was loving, and it was caring. It was all the things I've missed for so long. I was able to finally feel safe and protected again."

Nora listened to the whimsical, romantic way her friend spoke of the lying rapist she knew Todd Manning to be. "Sweetie…"

"Nora, I know you don't like the man. But he's innocent…"  
"He raped Marty…."  
"No innocent of killing Margaret."

Nora blinked at her shocked "Killing Margaret?"  
Evangeline realized that Nora didn't know why she and Todd were on that plane. She explained that Todd was sentenced to death row and Nora shook her head in disgust.

"Evangeline, near death experiences bring people close, but Todd Manning is no ones hero sweetie. You have to be careful."

"I don't want to talk about it anymore. Tell me how you feel? Have you seen Mathew yet? He missed you so much Nora." she asked not wanting to fight with her friend who she missed for so long.

"I haven't seen my baby and I can't wait! I feel confused most of the time, I mean the last time I saw you speak of someone with that kind of sparkle in your eye his name was John McBain."

Evangeline's smile faded and she looked away.  
"What was that comment when I came in here about?"  
Evangeline refused to answer and Nora shook her head "Have you spoken to him?"  
"Yes…" she said softly  
"Then you know?"

"What, that he can say those three words? Yeah I caught the show."

"Show?"

"Nora, please….a lot has happened. You don't understand."

"I can imagine, but he's still John."

"Exactly, he's still John and John wants what he wants when he wants it. It's always on his terms and it's always about his needs!" she said shaking her head.

"No sweetie, you didn't see him when you went missing. He was grounded you know. The FAA had declared you dead, but John didn't believe it. He launched his own search and rescue mission for you."

Evangeline looked at her shocked "He did?"

"Yes, he did…."

"He did arrive with Christian and Antonio."

"In the middle of a blizzard right?"

Evangeline smiled and nodded slowly "Yea, in the middle of a blizzard."

Nora rolled her wheel chair closer and touched her arm. "He loves you so much, and I saw it first hand. You can believe in it."

"No, I can't Nora. Not now, not from him just saying so. His actions spoke differently for a long time. I lost myself in him once and I won't do that again. No matter how much I love and want him back. I don't trust him anymore, not sure if I ever really did."

"I understand…"

Evangeline smiled "Thank you, thank you for not forcing me to believe again. I'm tired of relying on faith when it comes to loving that man."

"So take these handcuffs off me now!" Todd barked at John.

Bo looked at John "Take them off John, he doesn't really need them now."

"He's not free yet! There's still due process."

Hugh nodded "It's all a formality. He's not a flight risk and by the time he's released I'll have him out of the system." Hugh looked back at Todd "My department wants to extend its apologies for falsely accusing you."

Todd chucked "I plan to sue your ass to the hilt! You're an idiot and so is that ragtag police force you run. Shove your damn apology!" Todd said nastily.

John shook his head "Are you two sure of this!"

"Take these damn handcuffs off me now McBain!" Todd shouted at him.

John glared at him. Reaching in his pocket he grabbed the keys and pushed them into Bo's chest. "You do it!" he said before storming out.

"Hey John!" Todd called out after him.

John holding the door open looked back

"Ever win a spelling bee?" Todd asked smiling slyly his eyes sparkling with something John didn't understand.

John stared at him confused "What?"

"I'll tell you more about it sometime….see you around." Todd chuckled rolling his eyes. John glared a few more seconds before stepping out. Todd smiled to himself. He'd never let him near her again.

That Morning

Margaret sat inside the La Quinta Inn back in Llanview. She'd dyed her hair jet black and switched license plates on the back of Spencer's car. She was desperate to come up with a plan. Thank god she left the Motel 6 when she did. Her face was all over the news now.

Even more remarkable was the news of Todd's rescue, they were going to release him from death row, because they knew she was alive. Though it made her plans more difficult in the execution, she still had a greater chance at having everything she wanted.

Picking up TJ she kissed his tiny face "Mommy's doing all she can pumpkin to bring daddy to us." she said cradling him.

Her eyes wide with her delusions she looked around the room. "Maybe we can dress up and visit him in the hospital? Nah, that's too risky" she said rocking him and staring at the TV.

"I know maybe we can go and kill Blaire, then we get daddy all riled up and he'll come after us again!" she said grinning

TJ began to cry and Margaret frowned "Okay, okay….but killing Blaire would be fun, you have to admit that."

Opening her shirt she removed her breast, helping TJ latch on she silenced his cries. As he suckled she looked at the TV screen to see Todd's face in a side portrait next to Evangeline's.

"You know TJ, maybe we can use daddy's attorney to bring him to us. The news said they survived it together, so he trusts her I see. I think its time we learned more about this Evangeline Williamson"

"How's my Patient?" Michael asked smiling at seeing Evangeline in fresh clothes sitting on the bed with Layla sitting across from her. Layla was there first thing in the morning to help her with her release and bring her home.

"I'm great"  
"Yes you are, and you're also free to go home."

"That's wonderful news…." John said coming in the door. Evangeline looked up at him shocked and he winked at her. He had spoken to Layla and set this up.

Layla stood getting her purse. "Van, sweetie, Duke called and I have to go into the office. John said he'd give you a ride home."

Evangeline shook her head "Can't you just drop me off on your way to the office, I am free to go now right Mike?"

Michael nodded "All clear…" he said handing her the crutches he brought in.

Layla shook her head "I'm sorry sweetie, but I'm late. Plus John's more than capable." She said walking over to him and kissing him on the cheek. She saw how he fought to get her sister back and she finally believed that he loved her the way she should be loved.

Evangeline saw the exchange between them and knew it was a setup. She was confused that they were so close all of a sudden. "What's going on with you two?"

"Love you! I'll call you this afternoon" Layla said dodging the question and stepping out.  
Evangeline looked up to see John staring at her longingly and looked away.

"Well, stay off your feet. I want to see you in three weeks unless you experience swelling or any other pains."

"Thanks Michael"  
"No problem, glad you are alive sweetie." He said walking over and kissing her cheek.  
Evangeline smiled watching him leave out of the door as Todd came walking in. John looked at Todd and frowned.

Todd ignored John and headed straight for Evangeline "How are you today Princess?"  
"Todd!" she said smiling. "I'm good, they're releasing me…"  
"I heard…"  
"What are you doing up and around?" she asked frowning noticing that he wasn't wearing handcuffs.

Todd looked back over at John who didn't mask the glare of hatred he fixed on him. "John didn't tell you?"

She looked over at John who seemed like he was going to explode "Tell me what?"

"Margaret Cochran's alive! She killed Spencer Truman" he said

Evangeline exclaimed and reached for Todd excitedly. They embraced and John looked away, the pain of seeing her in his arms overwhelming him.

"Oh my god! What happened, how is this possible, what does Spencer Truman have to do with this?" she asked in disbelief.

Todd let go of her and kissed her forehead. Before he could speak he heard the door open and Starr exclaim his name "Daddy!"

Turning around in time for her to rush into his arms he hugged her and then reached for Jack who came running inside. Blaire came in and shot Evangeline an ugly look of jealously. "I figured when you weren't in your room, you'd be up here in hers!"

Todd looked up from hugging his children locking eyes with her.  
"Daddy I knew you were alive, I told mom! I never thought for a minute you'd leave us!" she said hugging him tightly.

Todd kissed her cheek and stroked her silky hair "That's right baby, I wouldn't leave you or Jack."

"Or mom right?" she said smiling looking back at Blaire then to her father.

Todd said nothing standing.

John looked at Evangeline who seemed to be uncomfortable by the hateful looks Blaire kept shooting at her. "Van, you ready?"

She looked at John and smiled weakly "I guess.."

Todd turned around "Where are you going?"

Evangeline tried to stand and John went to her to help her up then passed her, her crutches. "Home, you go ahead with your family."

Todd glared at John "Maybe you should get Layla to bring you home"

Blaire walked in closer "I think John can take care of her. Besides we need to talk….the news says a lot of things this morning….."

Todd turned and looked at her and saw her fear and guilt over Spencer Truman being connected to Margaret. He figured that's why she rushed over here with the kids. Her hands shook as she tried to remain calm in front of everyone.

Blaire knew what they were all thinking. Everyone saw her with Spencer and the whole town now knew how big a fool she really was. Worse of all, she'd slept with the man that almost killed her one true love. How on earth she could ever forgive herself after this was beyond her. First order of business was to get his forgiveness.

Evangeline understanding what Blaire was going through didn't want to cause more tension. The kids clung to Todd and she looked at Jacks face full of joy over the return of his father. She was happy he had his family back.

John watched her intensely and she looked up into his blue questioning eyes. "Let's go"  
Todd reached and touched her hand "I'll call you as soon as I'm free to work all this stuff out. You know there are some legal matters to attend too."

"Give it a day or two Manning, she needs to recover!" John interrupted and moved Evangeline away from him. Evangeline eyes locked with Todd's and she smiled "Call me…"

She walked out with John at her side. Leaning on her crutch she kept her head bowed. He said very little as he led her to the elevator. And the tension between them grew even thicker on the drive to her place. When they arrived in her apartment he closed the door unable to stand it anymore.

"What is going on with you and Todd?"  
Evangeline let go of one crutch and turned around with her foot raised to sit on the sofa. "Thanks for the ride home but you can go….."

"No Van it doesn't work that way." He said coming over to her and removing the crutches, preventing her from making an quick escape. Sitting down next to her he looked her over. "We have always been able to talk to each other"

"Really? If memory serves me correctly you weren't one big on talking." she said cutting her eyes.

John laughed "Okay I deserve that…."

"Yeah you do…"

"Van do you understand Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?"

"Don't go there John"

John reached for her hand and she allowed his touch. Turning over her palm, he kissed the inside of her wrist. "You've been through a lot…."

Pulling her hand away she looked at him shaking her head "So therefore my friendship with Todd is due to PTSD?"

"That's not what I'm saying, I'm not a doctor"

"That's right, you aren't and the last time some one tried to psychoanalyze you, you freaked!"

John sighed "I noticed the way you two are with each other and its natural Van, you both went through a lot. But you have to be careful, I don't want you to be hurt…."

"You don't want me to be friends with Todd…"

"Damn right! Why would I want the woman I love to cling to another man! I'm the man you should be reaching for!"

"Aren't your arms already filled with keeping Natalie close to your bosom?" she asked bitterly.

"It's over between me and Natalie Van…"

"It should have never started you selfish bastard!" she shouted at him.

John saw how much he hurt her. "Please…listen to me!"

"No! You want to know why I cling to Todd?"

"You told me, because he listens…" he said sarcastically leaning back into the sofa and looking up the ceiling.

"That's right he listens, but he did something you never did!" she snapped. He looked over at her confused "What? What did Todd Manning do for you that I never could?"

"I never said you couldn't do it, only that you didn't do it!" she shot back. "He asked me about my pain….he wanted me to lean on him…."

"You never wanted me to rescue you!" John said sitting up not understanding what she meant

Evangeline eyes watered. "Because John for you, it's a matter of rescue not support? I wanted your support. I wanted you to see that you aren't the only person with deep pain and fears. I wanted you to be invested in knowing more about me, not the lawyer and bedmate you made me, but me!"

"Sweetie, no…." he said reaching for her.

"Stop! I'm not confused, I know you care, I even believe that you love me…..but you still don't know me. You haven't made any attempt to really know me!"

Her words hit hard and he felt a greater sense of failure at hearing them. She was right, he loved her strength but he never inquired about what made her strong. He loved her heart, but he never inquired about what paths she took to have such a caring one. He loved all the things about her, but could only give you surface reasons as to who she really was.

"I never knew how to….I've been so messed up for so long…I just never knew…" he said his voice straining. She looked at him to see his eyes water with tears. Reaching for his face with a shaky hand she stopped herself. She couldn't comfort him, not when he didn't know how to comfort her in return.

"I think you should go" she said sadly

John looked over at her desperately. Without warning he grabbed her face and kissed her. She pushed at him with her strong hand but his tongue on her lips weakened her resistance. She kissed him back as he pulled her close, causing her to melt into him.

He felt her love for him still within that kiss and enjoyed it immensely. Letting her go he put his forehead to hers. "I will prove it to you, I'll do everything in my power to prove myself to you. Because your love is all I ever wanted. Because I want to know what makes you the woman that you are, so I can be the man that you need."

She touched his face sliding her hands through his silky hair "I love you with all my heart John, but I no longer believe in that love. I need you to let me go, because what we had is over. I no longer trust you and being next to you still hurts. Please just let me go."

"No deal baby, I won't let you run from me like I ran from you. I'm here and I'm staying." he said releasing her. Evangeline looked up at him surprised by his resolve. She didn't know how to respond to it. John rose from the couch and looked down at her. "I have a session with Dr. C, today. I will call you afterwards."

Evangeline touched her lips where his kiss still lingered unable to speak. He smiled at her. "Neither Todd or you will stop us from finding each other again. We'll have our happy ending."

With that said he walked away and out of the door. Evangeline shook her head trying to make sense of all that happened. She remembered Nora saying that he was committed to bringing her home, she also remembered Todd saying he's incapable of love. Lying down on her sofa she closed her eyes. One thing she knew for certain, was she loved him still. This time it just wasn't enough.

Christian stood at his easel mixing red and blue paints to come up with the royal color of purple. Purple reminded him of her. He decided to do another portrait for Evangeline as a welcome back gift. Hearing a soft knock at the door he turned to look at it confused. It was pretty early for a visitor.

Going over he slid the door open to see Natalie. She rushed into his arms throwing hers around his neck "Chris help me….god help me please!" she said crying.

Hugging her back he frowned by her unexpected need for him. Holding her in the doorway it all became clear to him. "So you found out that your hero cop has retired his cape when it comes to you?" he said pushing her out of his arms. "And then you have the nerve to run to me for comfort!" he shouted in her face.

Natalie blinked at him surprised by his anger and confused as to how to respond to it. Especially since his accusations were true.

Todd came into the apartment listening to Starr talk a mile a minute, Jack held his hand smiling up at him asking him to come to his room. All he could think about was Evangeline and if she was okay. Blaire closed the door asking Starr to take Jack upstairs so she and Todd could talk.

Starr happy to have her parents back gladly did so. Todd turned and looked at Blaire who stared back with tears in her eyes. "You want anything? Something to drink maybe?" she asked cautiously.

"Did you screw him in our bed?" Todd asked immediately.

Blaire shook her head sadly letting tears come down "No of course not!"

Todd smirked at her. "So tell me Blaire, how does it feel to know that you were sleeping with the man conspiring to kill your husband with Margaret Cochran of all people. I'm dying to know!" he said narrowing his eyes on her.

Blaire ran her hand through her long blonde curls and shook her head sadly. She didn't know where to begin.

Dr. Crosby sat at his desk signing off on some current psyche reviews he'd completed. He heard the door open and close thinking it was Peter Davis, the officer whose gunfire with a drug addict resulted in the death of a six year old.

"Have a seat Peter.."

"Its not Peter" John said coming in and taking off his coat.

Dr. Crosby looked up at him shocked. "John?"

"Here's the thing. I need you to help me get my life back before I loose the one thing that keeps me living."

Dr. Crosby nodded "Of course your job"

"No! Evangeline Williamson…."

written by tarskeewee08

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	2. Chapter 2

Lost Souls by LUVINGJOVAN

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Chapter 8: Lost Souls 

Dr. Crosby stared at him in disbelief he didn't understand where all this was coming from, "I heard about her rescue, is she okay?" He said setting his pen down and leaning back in his chair.  
"Broken wrist, sprained ankle, and pretty banged up but other than that she's fine." John said narrowing his eyes at Dr. Crosby.

He nodded his head and slowly moved around his desk to sit in the chair opposite John, "So you say she keeps you living huh?"  
"NO! I didn't say it, I know she does." He said glaring at him.  
"Okay let's take a few steps back here, because to me this is completely out of the blue."  
"Fine."  
"First, what about Ms. Vega I thought you two were together or kind of together." He said pulling a note pad from his desk.

John ran a hand over his face and leaned back in the chair. He stared down Dr. Crosby before letting out a soft sigh, "That's over, she can't be and I don't want her to be in my life."  
"I don't get it."  
John shook his head, "It's hard to explain most of the time I don't know why I do the things I do, but I do know one thing that is for sure, I want and need Evangeline in my life so that I can feel whole, complete, worthy and you are going to help me get her back."

Dr. Crosby held up his hand and shook it, "I'm not in the business of putting couples back together. If that is what you want I can refer you to another psychologist, a couples therapist. But if you want to work out whatever problems you have then I can do that."  
John pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes, "What do I need to do?" he said softly looking down at the floor.

Dr. Crosby smiled and stood up, sitting on the edge of his desk he smiled at John, "What you need to do is be honest with me, with yourself, and be ready to let go of some of the things that are holding you back from whatever it is you want out of life."  
"I want her…"  
"I get that, I understand that you see something in Evangeline that you want, that you feel you need."  
"I love her."  
"I don't see how?" Dr. Crosby said shaking his head back and forth.  
John glared at him shooting him daggers, "Excuse me!" he hissed.

"You heard me I didn't stutter and I sure as hell didn't mumble."  
"I love her." John said staring at him.  
"You don't, you can't! You can't even love yourself, how can you love someone else."  
"I know I love her, I don't care what you say."  
"Did you tell her this?"  
"Yes…"  
"And what did she say back?"

John stood from his seat and paced back and forth around Dr. Crosby's office, "I asked you a question John. If this is going to work, you have to be willing to give back and answer questions. I'm not going to do this on my own."  
"I know, I know damnit!" He snapped.   
"So what did she say?"  
"She didn't believe me." He said sadly, his face tight with pain and disappointment that he had waited so long to tell her these things. To finally open his mouth and actually speak.  
"When did you tell her these things? I mean she was just rescued from a plane crash and you what, I'm guessing you just spit it out that you love her?"  
"Yeah, something like that…"

Dr. Crosby laughed in his face his eyes brimming with tears, "McBain man you are totally screwed up. You honestly expected her to just say okay, I love you too!"  
"Yes…" he said staring at him confused, "I know she still loves me, she has too. We are…"  
"What soul mates? Yeah I'm sure you are, you dump her…"  
"She dumped me." He snapped, "I'm sick of everyone saying that I dumped her. If I had my way we would still be together." He said exasperated. John was sick of everyone saying these things, and no one believing him that he was in love with her and had been for some time now.  
"Okay, so she dumped you. I get that and I won't make that mistake again, but McBain you took up with another woman in front of her. You flaunted Natalie around knowing that she was married by the way and acted like her feelings didn't matter. You spent how long with Evangeline?"  
"A year." He said softly.  
"A year and what you are just now getting around to telling the woman that you loved her!"

John sat in his chair putting his head in his hands, "I know I screwed up and that's why I need your help. I need someone's help. She won't take me back, she won't see that I believe in her, that I love her without your help."  
"What do you want to get out of this John?" Dr. Crosby said sitting down in his chair behind his desk.  
"I want to let go and move forward with Evangeline. I want her to see that I love her and only her and that she's always been first in my heart and my head."  
"Tell her that."  
"I did! Dammit I did." He seethed, "This is pointless." John stood from his seat and walked to the door.

"You walk out that door and consider getting your so called life back nil and void John. I know this is going to be hard, but you have to face what so called haunts you man."  
John let his hand hover over the door and looked back at Dr. Crosby. He took a deep breath and placed his hand on the door knob.

"What are you doing here Cris?" Evangeline asked moving back from the door.  
"Just coming by to see how you are. I mean you were in a plane crash for goodness sakes." He said shaking his head as he sat across from Evangeline in her living room. "So how are you?"  
"Good, sore but good. Thanks for coming by."  
"Anything for you Evangeline, anything…" Cris said smiling.

Evangeline lowered her head as she cradled her right hand, "Can I ask you something?"  
"Sure anything!" he said grinning.  
"John…"  
"That man was out of control Evangeline, I don't think I've ever seen him so I don't know, so overwhelmed by it all."  
"Really?" she asked tucking her hair behind her ears.  
"Really, people were telling him left and right that you were dead, but he wouldn't listen to them. He kept saying that he would know that if you were dead."

"Oh okay…"  
"So did he tell you?" Cris asked tilting his head to the side.  
"Tell me what?" She asked shaking her head back and forth.  
"Don't play stupid with me Evangeline. After everything we've been through, even now… He told you didn't he?"  
"Yeah…."  
"And?"  
"What did we say before, no talking about my love life or in this case lack there of one."  
"How's Natalie?"  
"Why do you care?" he said laughing, "Remember no talk of love lives or lack there of."  
"Okay deal." She said smiling, "So now what?"

"Heck if I know, I just wanted to make sure you were alright. It was quite interesting to say the least to find you in the arms of Manning."  
"It's not what you think, it's not what any of you think." Evangeline said shaking her head, "Todd saved my life."  
"Like you did mine."  
"Sure, like I did yours. But he rescued me from that plane, I seriously owe everything that I will experience from here on out to Todd Manning."  
"Well I'm here too, I'm right here whenever you need me, anything you know that right?"  
"Thank you so much Cris, that means a lot to me." She said reaching and touching his hand.

Todd watched as Blair moved through the living room pacing back and forth in front of him, "Let me guess you don't know where to start huh? So let me help you out, we were supposed to be in this together Blair." He snapped glaring at her.

Blair sat down and put her heads in her hands, "Let me explain Todd. I mean all the evidence was piled against you!"  
"So what! You were supposed to stick by me. Why is that Evangeline could do that and you couldn't?"  
"She's paid to believe you." Blair snapped glaring at Todd.  
"She may be paid to believe in me, but she sure as hell didn't give up fighting with me when the jury came back with verdict."  
"What!" Blair snapped rising to her feet. She stood in front of Todd glaring at him, "If I recall you gave up yourself. You were so resigned to dying you practically had your will planned out." She hissed narrowing her eyes on him.

"Yeah maybe I did, but when you lose the one person that you always thought would trust you, believe in you, love you till the very end of everything you kinda loose your focus. That make sense!" he snapped.  
"I'm sorry, how many times do I have to tell you that. I made a mistake."  
"Oh please, you call screwing Truman a mistake. The man was out to get you and me both from the beginning. I seriously don't know how many times I tired to tell you that! He always had his hands on you and I see you finally gave in and spread them damn legs of yours." He huffed.

Blair reached up to slap him and Todd grabbed her hand, "Don't even think about it." He said glaring at her, "I'm not going to let you take out your bad decisions on me. I never gave up on us but from your need to get in Spencer's bed most likely before I was even back at Statesville proves that you did."  
Dropping her hand Todd took a step back and shook his head, "And to think I fought to get back to you, I was going to fight with Evangeline to clear my name." he said laughing and shaking his head.

Blair ran her hand over her wrist where Todd had held it tightly, "What is about you and her, I don't get it."  
"Who?"  
"Evangeline, I mean seriously what is about that woman!"  
"Jealous?" he asked with a sly grin.  
"Excuse me." Blair snapped, "Do I have reason to be?"  
Todd shrugged his shoulders as he walked past her heading upstairs to their bedroom.  
"Todd!" she yelled at him, "Todd damnit I'm talking to you!"

Taking the stairs two at a time Todd left Blair standing in the middle of the living room glaring at him and shooting daggers at the back of his head. There was no way she would let anyone come in between them. She dealt with Tea, Skye, Margaret and any other woman that thought they had any claim to Todd. He was her man and no one would take him from her, especially not Evangeline.

"Hey shorty…" Todd said peering into Starr's room.  
She looked up at him and smiled, "Hey dad, you and mom okay? I heard you two fighting down stairs."  
"Yeah you know us. That's what we do." He said patting her on the head as he climbed into bed next to her. Starr snuggled up under her fathers arm placing it around her shoulder and let out a deep sigh, "You know I never gave up that you were alive."  
"I know, I fought to come back to you and Jack."  
"Mom too…"  
Todd smiled softly, "Yeah you're mom too. There are some things we need to talk about?"  
"What's that?"  
"I can't stay her shorty. I need to get some things straightened out hun."

Starr shot up and glared at her father, "Leaving this house is not the way to do it."  
"Listen Starr…"  
"NO! You listen. I'm sick you and mom making all kinds of decisions for this family without thinking about how it affects Jack and I! You are going to stay in this house and work it out! I've been through way to much for you to just walk out on the both of us again."  
Todd smiled at her, her spunk, gumption to give him hell was one of the things he loved most about her. She was like him in that right. Sitting up on the bed and watched her glare at him with her hands on her hips. She was becoming her mother right in front of him, powerful, demanding, and wanting what she wanted and now! "I'm sorry shorty. I know what I have to do hun. Right now being here isn't where I need to be."  
"So what you're just going to run! Run from me!"

Todd walked over to her and pulled her into a hug holding her tight as Starr tried push him away, "Stop it! You can't leave me, us…" she said sadly chocking her tears back.  
"I'm not leaving, I just need to work some stuff out Starr. I'll be around you know that. I love you too much shorty to let you go." He said kissing the top of her head.

Starr pulled back from Todd wiping at the corners of her eyes. "I don't want you to leave me."  
"I'm not leaving you…" he said softly.  
"Then stay."  
"I can't not right now. Maybe at another time shorty, but now I can't…"  
"Fine, run! Be a damn coward." She hissed.  
Todd shook his head smiling at her, that was his daughter for ya.

"Hold on I'm coming!" Evangeline yelled grabbing her crutch and hobbling to the door. Her body hurt all over but she was glad for the pain medicine that Michael had gotten her. "Who is it?" she asked placing her hand on the door.

"Open up please…"  
Evangeline gasped at the voice, her hand shaking over the door knob. "Please I need to talk to you." John said softly placing both his hands on the door resting his head in between them.  
"John just go, I don't want to talk to you. It's over, please stop this…"  
"I'm not leaving, I'm not running from you, from us. Please just let me in. I'm only asking for five minutes."  
"Five minutes?" she questioned clicking the lock on the door. John heard the door unlock and let out a soft sigh of relief. He needed her right now, just to see her, hear her voice smell that soft scent that still lingered on his pillow months after she left him.

Pulling the door back she eyed the man in front of her. He was some how different yet the same, his eyes downcast to his shoes his hair falling around his face when he looked up at her his heart broke.

Evangeline's face covered in bruises her hand in a cast as she leaned against a crutch, "Can I?" John asked taking a step forward. Hobbling backwards on the lone crutch she moved out of his space as he tried to move closer to her. John slipped his hands in his pockets to prevent from touching her face, hair, her skin anything to get the contact he so desperately desired being next to her.  
"Sure…" she mumbled turning around and moving back to the couch.

John watched her slow movements and it broke his heart. If he had just listened to her about Manning she wouldn't have been on that damn crash and broken and bruised the way she was. Closing the door he walked over and stood in front of her hovering over her desperately wanting to wrap his arms around her and just spill everything, everything that kept him from truly loving her and giving himself over to her from the very beginning.

"What is it you want John." She said raising her foot up on a stack of pillows.  
John sat down careful to avoid her foot. Looking at her leg in an air cast he reached out to touch her foot softly, "Does it hurt?"  
"Not any more." She said shaking her head sadly. "That gave me a lot of drugs. You're five minutes is ticking away John, what brings you here and why?"  
"I started seeing Dr. Crosby today." He said letting his eyes wonder over her body.

Evangeline felt expose from his stare, exposed from the way his lips parted as he breathed the same air as her. Covering her chest she scooted back against the couch, "You know I love you right." He said scooting closer.  
"I told you it isn't enough John, nothing will be. It's over between us you need to move on."  
"Not going to work… You can push me away as much as you want but we both know it won't ever work." He said scooting closer to her.

Evangeline held up her hand as he narrowed in on her, "Please just go. I'm not ready to have this conversation with you now or ever." She said sadly shaking her head as a tear streamed down her cheek.  
"God I hate making you cry." He said touching her face softly, wiping the tear away.  
Evangeline pushed his hand away and it broke his heart a little more, "What do I have to do to get you to believe in us again?" he said softly leaning his forehead against hers, "I need you Evangeline."  
"Please John, go." She said in a shaky voice as her eyes fluttered closed.  
"You don't want me to go, I know you don't. You need me too, not as much as I need you, not as much as I love you but it's there and it won't ever go away." He said letting his lips graze over hers.

Evangeline sucked in her breath felling his hand move slowly into her hair pulling her head closer as he gently parted her lips with his tongue. He could feel her giving into the kiss, giving in to them to everything that they shared and more. John uncurled his tongue into her mouth inhaling the taste of her again, nothing compared to the way she tasted, the way she felt.

He put his hand up under her legs pulling her from the couch into his arms. Her arms went around his neck as he carried her from the couch to the bedroom. The kiss never broke as he moved slowly with her in his arms and gently lowered her onto the bed. John hovered over her as he kissed down her neck, as it arched exposing the soft tender, bruised flesh to him.  
"I promise to never hurt you again."  
"I can't, we can't…" she moaned.  
"We can… It's so right." He moaned against her ear as he parted her knees and slowly moved his pelvis against hers, "I love you and nothing will change that. I need you to say you love me, please…" he cried as his hand gently massaged her left breast.

Evangeline put her hand against his chest to push him away and John grabbed her left hand as he looked down at her, "I'm right here…. Right here waiting for you, I know I've made a lot of mistakes Evangeline but I want you to see me, to see that I'm trying to change."

She reached up and touched his face, that is what was different he was changing and for her, it was all of her. Feeling her palm on his face John lost all of his sense and kissed her hard against the lips, deeply passionately Grabbing at her pants John pulled them down and over her air cast. "I need you to tell me…" he whispered pushing her knees apart, "Tell me you love me, tell me you never stopped." He said holding back tears as he moved against her, not wanting to take her until she said it.

"I never stopped." She said crying as he clung to him with her good arm. "I never stopped."  
John pulled at his pants pushing them down as he worked his way out of his boxers and slid slowly into her. Evangeline gasped at the intrusion getting used to the feel of him again. Her tears ran down her cheeks as his did the same pushing his way in and out of her he grunted, feeling at home, feeling in heaven as he held onto her, and her love, their love something that no one could take from either of them.

"I'm right here waiting…" he moaned pushing in and out of her slowly, not wanting to release ever. John clung to her holding her against his chest careful of her injuries. "I need you, I always will…" he said desperately.

Evangeline stared at the ceiling as his words trickled into her ear and found her heart, the one place she never wanted him in again. "I love you too John." She said softly as she felt the fierce orgasm taking control of her. "I never stopped." She cried softly.

"MCBAIN!" Dr. Crosby snapped glaring at him.  
John shook his head and ran a hand over his face, "Yeah…"  
"Where were you?"  
"Did you say something?" John asked staring at him.  
"Yeah I asked why now, what has changed?"

"I almost lost her, lost my life." He said softly. "When I lost her, I lost everything that matter most and never knew it until she was almost gone from this world."  
Dr. Crosby shook his head understanding his finally decision to come back to therapy. He knew another loss could cause him to break, and from the look on John's face he was about to fall apart without Evangeline in his life. "You rescued her right?"  
"Yes…."  
"Even after Commissioner Buchanan told you to stay out of it."  
John looked up at him and rolled his eyes, "Yeah, even after."  
"Why can't you take orders John?"  
"He was trying to keep me from her!" he snapped.  
Dr. Crosby held up his hand and shook his head, "No, he wasn't. He was doing his job, something that you need to learn to separate."  
"What?"  
"This job John… it's all about the job for you isn't it. What are you trying to prove and who are you trying to prove it too?"  
"No one!" he hissed.  
"Bull! I saw how you were when she went missing. You were ready to kill Bo because of it. This need of yours to avenge the people you lost and to take it personally is clouding your judgment John."  
"So that's why you took my badge and gun?"  
"Yeah, partly, and the other part is that you have some deep routed trauma that you never got over. I'm guessing it all stems from your dad."

John stood up and shook his head, "Not ready for that yet." He said walking to the door.  
"Fine, same time tomorrow John! If you want her back, your job back you're going to have to open up some time or another, hopefully sooner rather than later!" Dr. Crosby called out to him.

"Where are you going!" Blair asked as Todd moved his things from their bedroom to the foyer.  
"I need to get my head clear Blair."  
"So stay, stay with me and the kids we need you Todd." She said reaching for him.  
"I'm sure you did, so that's why you slept with Spencer."  
"I apologized for that, are you ever going to let me live that down?"  
"Right now no! I don't care what you're feeling right now Blair. You screwed everything up by taking up with the man that framed me for Margaret's murder."

Blair reached for Todd's bags and Todd pushed her hands away, "Don't! I'm going and it's over between us."  
"The hell it is Manning, there is no way we're over and you know it!" Blair snapped staring at him.  
Todd shook his head as he opened the door, "I'm gone Blair, and since Spencer is dead I guess that leaves you all alone huh?"

Todd pushed his bags out into the hallway and smiled at the bellhop in front of him, "Get me a cab would you." He said handing the guy money.  
"Sir, yes sir…"

Todd turned to look back at Blair and to see Jack and Starr coming up behind him, "Where are you going daddy?" Jack said holding his frog close to his chest.

Todd looked up at Blair and then down at Starr and Jack, "I just need to get some things straight Jack."  
"But why are you leaving us, you just got home." He said sadly.  
Todd reached out and wrapped his arms around his son, holding him tight to his chest as he looked over at Starr, "You two keep your mom safe, she needs you right now."  
Starr held her arms across her chest holding back tears as Blair stood behind her sadly sniffling and wiping her eyes.

"I don't want you to go daddy… please." Jack said softly crying.  
"It's okay bud, We'll still hang out like normal okay?"  
"NO daddy don't go!"

Todd looked up at Starr as he slowly stood and grabbed his bag. Putting it on his shoulder he reached out for Starr who snatched her arm back and ran up the stairs. Blair reached out to touch Todd and he turned his back on her, for the last time. "Since Margaret is alive I'll get some guards for you and the kids okay."  
"Thank you, but I would feel safer if you were here with us."  
"I can't Blair, I can't look at you the same way."

Walking out the door Blair reached for Jack and held him against her as Todd left them, but it wasn't over it never will be over, "I'll be right here waiting for you Todd!" she called out after him.

"Coming!" Evangeline yelled grabbing her crutch and moving slowly to the door, "Hold your horses. " She mumbled as the pounding on the door became insistent.

Looking through the peep hole she closed her eyes and let out a deep smile. Opening the door she took a step back, "What are you doing here?" she asked tilting her head to the side.  
"I need a place to stay." Todd said holding his bags up in the air smiling at her.  
Evangeline hobbled backwards as Todd lugged his stuff into the apartment.  
"Why here, why not the Palace, "She asked watching him bring in bag after bag.

"What you don't want me here Princess?" Todd asked pouting.  
"I didn't say that, it's just that you've got all this money. Wait a minute, what does Blair thing about this!" she asked with a raised eyebrow.  
"Does it matter because right now I don't care about what she thinks." He snapped.  
"Oh okay, we'll lay off the Blair subject for the time, but seriously Todd the Palace?" She said falling back on the couch propping her foot up.

"How's the wrist princess, the ankle too?" Todd asked avoiding her question as he sat down next to her. Todd gently picked at her big toe smiling, "They are good, I'm good." She said smiling at him brightly.

"You need anything? Some more pain meds, what they got you doped up on any way?" he asked reaching for her pill bottle, "Wow Tylenol with Codeine, good stuff man." Todd said smiling.  
"Give me those!" Evangeline laughed snatching the pills away from him. "Those could get ya a whole carton of cigs in Statesville." He said smiling  
Evangeline shook her head ignoring his comment, "You know I don't have much space here." She said looking around.

Todd stood and walked around her apartment taking it all in, "It's not as big as the penthouse but it will do."  
"My sister stays here too Todd, we don't really have the room." She said looking over her shoulder.  
"I could sleep with you." He said smiling and raising his eyebrows at her.  
"Not going to happen." She said laughing and turning away from him.  
"Oh why not, it will be just like our little home away from home."  
"What the ranger station?" she said looking over at him.  
"Yeah that. I mean we've already slept together once might as well do it again."

"You what!" Layla snapped slamming the door.  
"Layla…" Evangeline said shocked to see her.  
"You slept with him!" She said heated glaring and pointing at Todd.  
"Best I ever had." He said smiling as he leaned against a table placed under the window.

Layla narrowed her eyes on her sister and then back at Todd, "Please tell me he's kidding Vangie." She said placing her hands on her hips.  
"I'm not Layla. We slept together and it was amazing." Todd said smiling.  
"Todd stop it!" Evangeline said shooting him daggers. "Layla we did not sleep together, Todd stop joking around."  
"Then what is going on here! What is he doing here Vangie?"  
"I'm your new rommie!" He said smiling.  
"What on god's green earth are you talking about!" Layla said staring at Todd as she moved across the room to stand in front of him. She looked at Evangeline and then back at Todd, "What is going on here. I thought that John told you that he loved you." She asked confused.

"What does McBain, have to do with me living with you?" he said leaning over into Layla's face. Layla pushed Todd away and walked over to Evangeline. Kneeling next to her Layla ran her hand over Evangeline's face careful of her bruises. "Sweetie, what are you doing?"  
"It's not enough Layla."  
"It's what you wanted." She said softly.  
"It's what I thought I wanted, but now I know I need more, I deserve more, I want more Lay."  
"That's right Princess. You deserve someone that is devoted to you and only you." Todd said walking over to them.

"That's John damnit! You didn't see how he was when you were missing either of you!" Layla said clearly irritated not only at the situation but at Todd being a little bird in her ear telling her the complete opposite of what she needs in her life.  
"No it isn't Lay…" Evangeline said softly.  
"The hell it isn't! I'm going to prove it to you."   
"You sound like John." Evangeline said laughing, "Cris too."  
"That should tell you something Van. I mean the man was out of control! He loves you Evangeline and he's telling anyone that will listen!"

"I don't care!" Evangeline snapped glaring at her sister. As Evangeline tried to stand up they all heard a knock at the door. She looked up at Layla and then back over at Todd, "I'll get it." Todd said rushing to the door.  
"The hell you will." Layla snapped jumping up from the floor.  
Todd pushed Layla out of the way and walked over to the door. Flinging it open Todd smiled a sly smirk, "McBain." He said grinning.  
"What the hell are you doing here Manning." John said glaring at him.

By: Oltlfantimes10

Back to Index

Chapter 9: Lost Souls 

Todd smirked looking John in the eye, he had to admit he was enjoying this too much. "Come in McBain." he said opening the door wider.

John with his hands in his pockets scowled at Todd stepping past him into his lady loves place. Layla was on the other side of Todd, looking relieved that he showed up. For a minute she thought she'd have to talk some sense into her sister alone.

The air was thick with tension as John and Evangeline communicated without words. John had to admit he didn't like the look in her eyes. Those eyes used to stare back with such adoration and love. Now she stared at him as if he was a stranger.

"Why is he here Van?" John asked softly his heart beating in his chest by the way she continued to resist him.

"I live here now!" Todd said closing the door. It was those words that made him take in the suitcases that were near her feet. It seemed to be some kind of sick joke. "What.?" he mumbled unable to hide his discomfort.

Layla had, had her full of Todd's unwelcome visit and decided to put an end to the stupid game he was playing with her sister. "The hell you do! I'm on to you..there's no way in hell you're staying with me and my sister!" Layla snapped glaring at Todd.

"Tell me he's joking right?" John asked taking a step toward Evangeline giving her a weak smile. The cast on her arm and the bandaged foot, made her appear more vulnerable to him. Whatever happened as a result of this plane crash had really taken its toll. His Vangie would never let Todd Manning move in.

Evangeline glared at him finally coming out of her shock at his reappearance. She didn't believe in his sincerity and was even surprised by a return visit. Why wasn't he brooding at the station with that preschooler at his feet? And who did he think he was looking at her as if she lost her mind. "I don't owe you any type of explanation John." she said moving from the sofa carefully on her crutches.

"The hell you don't!" he said stepping in front of her, blocking her way. This madness had to stop and if she didn't put an end to it, he would.

"Why don't you get out.the lady isn't in the mood for one your whiny sessions!"

John glared over his shoulder pointing at Todd with rage all over his face. "You shut up Manning before I shut you up!" he snarled.

Layla came over to Evangeline, standing in front of her. "Van, please what are you doing what is going on with you and Todd? You can't possibly want him here."

"Lay don't you have to be at work now?" Evangeline asked tired of them both implying that she's loosing her mind.

"I'm not going anywhere until you throw him out!" she said folding her arms across her chest.

"Layla, leave! I mean it." Evangeline snapped back, fixing her eyes on her sister with a serious stare. Layla stood her ground as John ran his hands through his hair. He had come because he heard Bo say that Nora was going home today. He thought he'd surprise her by taking her to see her.

He had no idea that Manning had gone this far. Looking at the two sisters staring each other down he noticed Todd smirking devilishly from the corner of his eye. The asshole was enjoying the standoff.

John decided to orchestrate peace, touching Layla softly on the shoulder, he spoke to her comfortingly. "I'll take care of her, there's no way Manning is staying here."

Todd sucked his teeth and walked around John to stand next to Evangeline "You really are a egomaniac..didn't the lady tell you that she didn't want you? So go jump back in that bat mobile of yours and chase after that Joker you've been keeping time with, while her husband rotted in jail." 

John smiled "Oh so now you're an expert on what the lady needs, I'm supposed to believe that she wants you?"

"No, Johnny boy..I want her. Something you never seemed to be able to commit to with your obsessions with the teen queen!" Todd said smiling.

John took a step toward Todd and Evangeline moved in front of him. "Back off John! You don't tell me what to do in my own damn home!" she hissed

Todd stood behind her smirking, touching the strand of her hair so lightly she didn't notice but Layla and John did. Their distrust of his motives was proven by his obvious glee at the melee he caused.

Evangeline looked over to her sister "I said go to work, I can handle myself!"

Layla shook her head sadly, then turned to John. "Get him out of our place, please" she said then looked at Evangeline "I know you think that you two have some kind of bond Vangie, but please remember that those that love you are standing on this side of the room."

The words echoed through the now silent apartment that was charged with tension. Layla sighed then turned to get her things before heading for the door. John didn't even watch her leave he stared at Evangeline with a wounded look on his face.

"You can leave now too John.." Evangeline said standing her ground.

"Are you going to tell me that you will move that animal in with you!"

"I'm telling you that, you have no say in who stays or goes in my place. Whatever I decide to do with Todd is none of your concern."

"I need to talk to you Van, I'm not leaving until we do." He said looking back at Todd and clenching his jaw. He looked back over to Evangeline with love. "I love you dammit and I won't let you push me away, because my love scares you."

Todd burst into laughter stepping from around her "Scares her? Boy you really haven't been listening. She's not afraid..she's over it. She's on to you McBain, your free pass into her heart expired, when you became an adulterer, rubbing her face in it."

"Todd! Stop it now!" Evangeline shouted turning on him "I mean it! I can handle this by myself and your taunts aren't helping."

Todd blinked at her somewhat hurt by her outburst. "I'm sorry princess."

"Can you excuse us please.I'd rather talk to John alone."

Todd went and touched her hand "I don't want to leave you alone with him, he'll just try to manipulate this and make you feel bad about our friendship."

John saw him touching her and lost it. He moved swiftly, shoving Todd away from Evangeline with so much force he almost knocked the crutch from under her arm "Don't you ever put your hands on her!" he growled as Todd stumbled back.

"John!" Evangeline gasped at his jealous outburst.

Todd glared and shoved John back with just as much force "Come on McBain, take your best shot, I'm not some junkie for you to shoot down. You push I push back!"

"Stop it now!" Evangeline screamed at them both, giving them pause. She had enough of the testosterone in front of her. She wasn't going to get anything accomplished as long as they remained. Turning she looked at Todd. "How's Blaire and the kids.really.."

Todd frowned "I have a guard on them."  
She smiled "Todd, Margaret is loose.do you really think leaving them now is such a good idea?"  
"I plan to get Starr and Jack everyday.."  
"And what? Bring them here?" she asked  
Todd looked at her "I can't be around Blaire now, and I know you can't be around him! We can help each other.figure it all out" Todd said touching her cheek.

John watched them clinching his fists trying to restrain himself. He'd never seen another man touch her. He barely saw her and RJ together before they hooked up. The sight of her allowing Todd's touch made his stomach clench with knots.

Evangeline touched Todd's hand "I love you for being the friend I need. But I'm my own person, neither you or John can control me. Now I need you to do the right thing and see about your family. Then together we'll take care of the rest of the charges if any are lingering against you. You know you are only here because you're hurt."

Todd sighed "That may be true, and it's killing me that Starr and Jack need me now and I'm not there, but I learned some things Evangeline. You taught me some things."

"What?" she asked confused.

"I learned that it's the goodness in people you should hold on to. My relationship with Blaire is rooted in pain, we've done so much to each other. At first I didn't even blame her for not believing in me. But my time with you, at my side fighting for our lives, changed all that. I saw it in you. You never gave up on me. That is the type of devotion that he'll never understand. It the devotion I want in return, when I share myself with someone." Todd said looking over at John.

"Don't pretend to know me Manning, on my worst day I am nothing like you!" John snapped.

Evangeline took Todd's hand "Go home, don't run away. Remember we agreed that we would fight. You give up on your family now and cling to something that you've romanticized will only make things worse." 

Todd inhaled deeply and let go a slow breath. "It's over with me and Blaire, but I do need to make sure Starr and Jack are okay."

"No guard can protect them like you can." She said smiling  
"I'll be back, maybe take you to dinner?" he said smiling at her and then glancing up slyly at John.

Evangeline nodded "We'll see, call me later. I need to contact the ADA to find out what is the standing on your case. He has you walking around town free so that has to be good"

Todd nodded and kissed her forehead. Letting go of her hand he knelt and picked up his suitcases. John slipped his hands in his pockets and stared at him angrily. Todd walked over to him smiling "Care to follow me out? The lady sure as hell won't be asking you to stay." 

John cut his eyes "Get out of my face."  
Todd looked back at Evangeline, "I'm going to check into the Palace first, then I'll check on the kids. You call me if you need me..promise."

"I promise"

Todd nodded and headed out the door.

John watched Evangeline as she moved back to the lavender sofa to sit down. Placing her crutches on the side she shook her head causing her long locks to fall in her face. "John you can go as well"

"I came to take you to Nora."  
Evangeline looked up shocked "Nora! Is she okay?"  
"She's home today and I'd thought you'd like to see her" he said smiling

Evangeline nodded "Oh yes.I would"

Before she could rise John sat on the long lounge cushioned bench to the side of the sofa in front of her. "Can you tell me what's going on with you? Give me some clue as to why you look at me with such detachment...have I really lost you?" he asked his voice cracking

Evangeline lowered her face "I explained this to you when you brought me home..what else do you want me to say?"

"You also kissed me.I was here remember. That kiss wasn't a goodbye kiss."  
"That kiss shouldn't have happened, I was weak."  
"Weak? You aren't weak, That word shouldn't be in your vocabulary."  
"Then what the hell do you call it!" she snapped looking up at him with tears in her eyes.  
"I call it love.you love me."  
"John here's a news flash..I loved you all along, it never made a difference to you then, why should it now?"

"Because I'm learning myself..because then when you loved me I was a broken man, who didn't love himself. I'm fighting to get back to you, to get back what he had"

"What we had was you taking and me giving."  
"That's not fair."  
"I tried to change you" she said wiping her eyes "I just couldn't believe that you were this man you are. My nana told me once _When a man shows you who he really is, BELIEVE him._ You showed me that you were a man that didn't want love, and I convinced myself otherwise. I was a fool."

"NO...that's not true..You saved me. I may not have wanted your love, but I found out when I almost lost it your love is all I ever wanted. I want to give it back to you in return."

"You did loose it" she said sitting back pulling her hand from his.  
John stared at her his heart breaking "Don't say that, don't ever say that!" 

"It's true, I no longer believe in us."  
"Well belief and faith are the same things and I know that's it's my actions that will restore both. I just can't have you closing doors and not giving me a chance."

"Its too hard and I'm tired of being selfless in this. I need to protect me." 

"Something happened between you two.I see it when you're together" he said bitterly in reference to Todd.

Evangeline looked up at him angrily "Don't you dare accuse me of sleeping with him again!" she snapped

John sat up straight and shook his head sadly "I wish you had, sleeping with him I can deal with. Hell I wouldn't like it, but I'd survive it after all I've done to you. What I see now scares the life out of me."

"What is it that you think you see?"  
"Intimacy..you're intimate somehow. He's seen a part of you that I haven't. I'm right aren't I?"

"You never tried to know everything about me." she said looking away. She shared her deepest pain with Todd. She'd never told anyone about her father and her fears of failing people. Her fears about love.

"Then that's where I'll start"  
"Start what?" she said aggravated.  
"That's where I'll start to get your faith back, I'll get to know you, not the iconic woman I've made you into, but all of you."

"John please.why can't you just let this go." she asked shaking her head.  
"I did that once Vangie, I let go and it destroyed the best thing that ever happened to either one of us. I may not have you now, but I won't let it be because when I decided to fight, I let go. I won't let you slip away from me like that again."

Before she could speak the phone rang. They both looked over at it as if it was the third person in the room. John rose to get the phone passing it to her. She smiled weakly before answering.

"Hello"  
"Hey sweetie" Nora said in a soft voice.  
"Hey you..John's here and he said they brought you home."  
"Yeah, I'm home and I need to see you"  
"Something wrong?" Evangeline asked looking at John frowning.

"You've been on my mind heavily after I saw you in the hospital. I just need to talk to you..plus, I'd rather your company as oppose to this nurse that Bo has positioned over me."

"Sure thing, I'll get dressed and pack an overnight bag. We'll make it a night" she said smiling  
"I'd like that"  
"See you soon"  
"Bye"

Evangeline clicked the phone off and looked to John "Guess I will need that ride after all" she said reaching for her crutches and struggling to rise. John helped her to her feet and she flinched from the contact. Her stiffening instead of softening from his touch hurt him. She looked up at him shyly "I just need to change."

"Can I help!" he asked quickly before realizing how inappropriate it was.  
She frowned at him. "No, I think I can manage" 

"Of course.." he said moving out of her way.  
She headed to her room then looked back at him "I can't stop you from making changes in your life John. I really do want you to be all that you should be. I will say that what you saw in me and Todd is genuine, he's my friend and I won't let go of his support in place of your empty promises."

John sighed and nodded "I won't let him hurt you"

"And I won't let you hurt me" she shot back before turning and going to her room.

John shook his head in frustration "Manning..you won't use her. I'll stop you and prove to her that our love is real.." he mumbled to himself.

He knew that she was scarred from the kidnapping, his inability to love her back and now plane crash, but he now knew that some of her scars went further than that. Since he was in the process of his own self healing, he decided to become more vested in hers.

Mavis, was in her late sixties. She spent most of her days in front of the TV watching her soaps and doing cross road puzzles. The only living relative she had in Llanview was her hot tempered nephew Hector.

He visited regularly and paid her utilities. To her he was a good boy, but she'd bailed him out a couple of times to know that he wasn't as angelic as she hoped. Earlier today she got a call from him, he said he needed a favor and she had to come through. Mavis didn't know what on earth that favor could be?

"Look I just can't leave TJ with some old woman that you claim is okay!" Margaret hissed in a hush voice to avoid drawing attention to herself.

Hector looked at her "My auntie is cool, and every news station in this town is broadcasting your face. You asked for my help and this is the only place you can leave him safe so you can get the money you promised me!" he snapped back

Margaret glared at him and then smiled evilly "Are you toying with me?"  
"Of course not! You contacted me!" Hector said confused by the way she flipped in and out.

"That's right, I did. But if this is some kind of trap I promise you I'll make you pay!"

Hector shook his head. If he hadn't have helped this crazy broad in the past to a substantial financial gain, he'd turn her ass in just because she creeped him out. "Look, if you have a better idea on what to do with your kid, let me know. I don't need this!"

Margaret looked at TJ sleeping her arms then up at the door to the apartment of a woman she didn't know. "It will take me 72 hours at best.and she better be on the up and up for both your sakes"

"Fine" he said going to the door and unlocking it. Mavis looked up from her soaps to see her nephew with a woman wearing shades and shoulder length black hair. The woman was holding an infant and a baby bag. 

"Mijho, what is this?" Mavis asked standing up.

"Hola tiíta, I'd like to introduce you to Senora Manning and her little niño TJ."  
Mavis nodded and extended her hand. Margaret just stared at her through her dark shades refusing it.

Hector touched his aunt back affectionately. "I need a favor tiíta"  
"Of course Hector, anything for you mijho"  
"Can you watch the baby for a couple of days?" he asked smiling  
Mavis frowned "Watch him?"

Margaret sucked her teeth "Maybe this wasn't a good idea."  
Hector went to stop her, she had promised him $50,000.00. He wanted that money. "Wait, please.my aunt can help. Please." he said stopping her.  
Mavis stared at the both of them. Something about the woman was unsettling and she couldn't figure out why. Part of it was her wearing shades during a snowstorm, the other part was the menacing way she felt her staring at her from behind them.

Margaret turned and smiled slyly "Mavis, let me explain to you how important it is that you take care of my TJ" she said in a menacing tone that let Mavis know right away her suspicions were right.

Christian walked into Rhodi's with his hands in his pocket. He saw Evangeline earlier and was glad she was okay. Spending the rest of the day painting he decided to weather the snow storm and get a beer. Looking over to the bar he saw his ex wife cradling hers. She looked to be lost and part of him felt lost with her.

Staring for awhile he contemplated leaving, he wasn't up for another sparring match with her. When she came to his place for comfort he threw her out so quick he barely processed it. Now she sat alone mourning the lost of a love that was never hers in the first place. He hated McBain for reducing her to this. He hated her for letting him.

"Hey, how you doing Chris?" Layla asked walking up.

Christian looked over at her surprised "Hey yourself, what are you doing here? I heard you worked in the Buchanan Corporate Palace downtown"

She laughed and stared into his penetrating almond colored eyes "Yeah I do, but I'm on a shoe string budget, me and some folks from work decided to meet over here, since they are sending everyone home early from work because of the storm."

"Why didn't you go home?"  
"I did, but it got a little crowded. Called some friends for a drink. Want to join us? They are pretty cool.." She said smiling

Christian looked back over at Natalie "Yeah maybe."

Layla looked over to see where he was staring "Please don't tell me you are going to go over there.." She said sucking her teeth. Christian was to fine to be wasted on her.

"Save a spot for me, I'll join you soon." he said smiling and walking away. Layla watched him make his way over to Natalie. Shaking her head she rolled her eyes "A waste." she mumbled returning to her friends.

Natalie ate some of the peanuts from the round brown little bowl on the bar. She didn't notice the guy leaning in on the side of her and didn't care. It was beginning to dawn on her how big of a joke her life had become. The man she had all but turned herself inside out for now clearly wants another. The husband she cast aside is also chasing the woman she hated the most in this world. The irony of her loss in choices was not wasted on her.

"Care to share those?" Christian asked pointing at the peanuts.  
Natalie looked over at him "what are you doing here?" she asked bitterly  
"I guess I could ask you the same question, but I pretty much have your answer committed to memory, John. Am I right?"

"Please, just leave me alone" she said turning up her beer and drinking it down. It was her third and she was becoming numb.  
"Let me ask you something" he said sitting down on the stool staring at her.  
"Couldn't stop you if I wanted too"  
"Guess not" he chuckled "Do you wish I stayed gone, honestly. That I never returned the first time..that I'd died in that van when it went into the river"

Natalie looked at him hurt "God no. Do you think me capable of that?"  
"I don't know who you are anymore. For me our love was timeless, but you fell in love with the man that was responsible for my supposed death. How is that possible?"

"John never meant."  
"Doesn't matter! You saw the setup and what happened. Was I that wrong about us?"

Natalie dropped her head "Christian, I can't explain my heart to you."

"You know I loved you Natalie, and I've loved you for so long that you were apart of me. But the woman that I loved was strong and knew who she was. You have turned into something unrecognizable. I no longer long for you the way I did. I can't, I don't know who you are anymore." he said rising from the stool.

Natalie grabbed his arm "Listen to me. Inside I am that woman, and yes I miss her too. I need you to give me a chance to find her again. I need to find my way out of what I've become."

Christian nodded "I hope you do find her for your sake, as for your chances..well I'd say you're fresh out" he said turning and walking away, his heart breaking at finally closing the door on something he longed for, for so long. Evangeline was right, he was a man before her and he'd be one after her.

Layla smiling with her friends looking up in time to see Christian leave the bar, she then looked at Natalie who sat at the bar crying.

Smiling she drank her beer "Couldn't have happened to a nicer chick."

Blair sat in their barely lit penthouse nursing her gin and tonic. Todd had two guards stationed outside of her door and one living with them full time. He thought that was enough when in actuality the only thing that would make them safe was to have him home.

The door lock clicked and guard sitting in front of it rose sticking his hand in his jacket pocket. Todd opened the door, to both their surprises. Blair stood up smiling, a sense of relief washed over her at his reappearance. Todd closed the door and looked at the guard "Any trouble?"  
"None, sir"  
"Good" he said walking in. Blaire came over to him wearing jeans and a green sequined tank top, she tossed her blonde curls and smiled at him bashfully. He stared at her with a disenchanted look on his face. It broke her heart

"Where are Starr and Jack?" he asked dropping his key on the desk to the left of him.  
"One of your henchmen went to go pick them up from school." She said coming over "I'm glad to see you" 

"I need to be here when they get home, to let them know that it's going to be okay"  
"So you're staying?" she asked excitedly  
"No, I'm at the Palace. I will be coming over frequently to see about them."  
"What about me? The mother of your children and the love of your life." she asked walking toward him. He stared at her unmovable. Blaire took that as an opening and went for it. "Todd, we need to talk, this is silly. Its time to get our life back."

"You mean, the life you gave up when Dr. Frankenstein took you to bed?"  
Blaire put her hand to her forehead "I can't make that up to you if you won't let me."

"Well, then we do have a problem, because I have no intention of letting you!" he snapped going to the bar.

"Don't you stand there and pretend that you haven't done things, cruel and unforgivable things to me in the past. In spite of it all we have always found our way back to each other." 

Todd laughed "Well I will admit that I'm no paragon of virtue, and we have our equal share of pain between us. But you know what I am?" he asked turning around to look at her.

Folding her arms across her chest she shrugged. "No, tell me." 

"I'm devoted. I have always been devoted to you. Funny thing is I thought you were the same way. But when I was facing death and needed devotion, you showed your hand. You let another woman stand in your place and fight at my side. Now I know what faith and devotion is, and I know I can never have that with you!"

Blair burst into tears. Putting both hands to her face she cried in them destroyed by his words, because she saw the truth in them. She failed him miserably. The guard at the door looked away embarrassed by the whole scene in front of him. He didn't understand what was wrong with the couple but he knew that Mr. Manning's cold behavior was destroying his fiancé. It was hard to watch.

Todd swallowed at her tears. His hand shook as he lifted his glass to his lips drinking his whiskey. It took everything in him not to comfort her, seeing her this way reminded him that he loved her so. 

Thinking of Evangeline lying in his arms shivering telling him of how she just wanted to do right by people, his resistance of the love he once shared with his ex-wife grew. He wanted out, and he was determined to escape her.

Nora looked up from the sofa, as the nurse home with her, opened the door. Evangeline came in on crutches with John carrying her bag. She looked over to Nora smiling and Nora felt a sense of relief to see them together. 

She couldn't rise to greet them, still confined to a wheel chair. The coma had her partially paralyzed and she would need physical therapy to recover the feelings in her legs.

"Looks like you handle those things well" she said smiling as Evangeline leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"I'm getting the hang of them" she said letting them go to sit on the sofa. John brought the bag in and laid it next to the lounge chair, before taking a seat. "How are you Nora?"

"Better, John. Thank you for bringing her"

He looked over to Evangeline who avoided his eyes. He tried talking to her on the ride to Nora's, but she had shut him out She was no longer willing to debate their love and he was desperate to reach her. "You know there isn't anything I wouldn't do for our girl" he said smiling

Evangeline ignored him leaning over to touch her hand "Is Mathew here?"

"He and Bo just left. I miss him already, he grew some Van.." She said her voice cracking

Evangeline rubbed her hand "Its okay sweetie"  
She nodded "Its scary, time stood still for me, but so much has changed." She then looked over at John smiling "Then again the love you two share seems to be as strong as ever, and once again you both are fighting it."

Evangeline frowned and John winked at Nora grateful for the endorsement. He figured leaving her here for the night was actually the best thing. Not only did it put her out of Manning's reach, but she got to be with someone who knew how much he loved her. "Well I think I will go now" he said rising

Nora shook her head "Do you have too?"  
"Yeah.I need to get back to the station. I have another session with Dr. C."  
"Dr. who?" 

Evangeline avoided his eyes "Long story, I'll fill you in."

John went to Nora and kissed her cheek. "See you again soon"  
He then looked at Evangeline "I guess a kiss is too much to ask?"  
Evangeline shot him a mean scowl and he chuckled "Call me if you need anything, including a ride home."

"I won't need anything, but thank you" she said coolly  
He smiled weakly "Thought you might say that" he said turning to leave.

Nora watched the exchange, narrowing her eyes on her friend. John said another goodbye heading out the door. "Okay we need to talk"

"Not about him!" Evangeline snapped immediately regretting it.

Nora smiled "Oh sweetie, this talk is all about you."

Margaret drove on the interstate checking her rearview mirror for cops. She was sick to her stomach about leaving TJ. She would have to find Todd and soon so they could get out this damn town. Figuring Todd had a fortress around him and Blaire, she had to put plan B into motion. She knew exactly who to go too to get the help she needed.

John walked into the station looking down at his watch. He had another session with the doctor in 20 minutes and he figured he'd catch up on some paperwork before they met. Walking with his head down he ran directly into Natalie.

"Sorry."  
"Excuse me.."  
John looked at her and saw she'd been crying, she smelled of beer. "Hey you okay?"  
"No and we need to talk" she said her speech somewhat slurred  
"Natalie I really can't do this with you"  
"John, listen it's not a ploy to get you back. I want my life back, the place to start is with you. So can we talk or not!" she shouted at him her eyes tearing again.

John saw several officers stopping to stare. Shaking his head and blowing out a defeated breath he nodded on." He said heading to his office. The sooner he finished this with her the better.

Dr. Crosby standing off to the side watched the confrontation. He heard the outburst from Natalie and saw the missing link he needed to further understand McBain.

"So you want one woman, but find it hard to let go of another. There has to be a reason behind that. I think its time figure out what it is" he thought to himself sticking his hands in his pockets. He was really looking forward to this next session.

Paige took off her jacket going through the mail. The storm was creating a nightmare at the hospital. She'd been on call for 72 hours straight. Coming home was a welcomed relief. She even cancelled on Bo, for the needed time and space. Hearing something to her right she jumped. A woman came out of the shadows in all black with dark shades. Paige looked at her confused. "Who the hell are you?"

Margaret took off her shades and tossed her thick black mane. "Hello Dr. Miller.are you happy to see me?" she asked smiling devilishly at her..

Back to Index

Chapter 10: Lost Souls 

John stood against his desk with his hands on his hips as Natalie slowly closed the door and turned to look at him, "What you said in the hospital was that true?" she asked with staring straight ahead at John, her eyes focused solely on him.

John shook his head and ran a hand over his tired face. For once in his life he knew what he wanted and it wasn't standing in front of him. She was back at Nora's talking with her, hoping that Nora could talk some sense into her and make her see that he was changing for her. "Natalie please… I can't do this with you."  
She looked up at him her bottom lip and chin quiver tears glistening in her eyes, "All I wanted from you was love John." She said softly.

John stood and took a step to her and then restrained himself. This wasn't the way to handle her. "Natalie… yes, what I said in the hospital was true. I love her."  
"But… we've been through so much, Haver, Hayes, Walker Lawrence how can you stand there and tell me that you don't love me."  
"I never said that, I said I'm not in love with you. I will always care about you Natalie; we're friends."  
"I can't just be your friend John." She said reaching out to touch his face. John turned his head and Natalie sucked in a breath at his rebuff of her advances, "Please Natalie. I was there for you when Cris died because I felt guilty, I thought… I thought it was more than that."  
"It is!" She snapped, "We have this thing…" she said motioning between them, "This connection I know it John. You're a part of me, that's why you save me, you love me…." She said walking closer to him.

John stood there in shock at her saying all this. She said it wasn't a ploy to get him back but she was playing games. Why didn't he just say no he couldn't talk and leave it at that? She claimed she was just trying to get her life back, shaking his head he stared at the girl in front of him, lying again to get her way.

John shook his head and then lowered his gaze from hers, "Natalie it isn't what you think. I don't get it myself, but I just can't do this now or ever. It isn't healthy."  
"Healthy! I don't understand."  
"I'm a screwed up guy Natalie, and you know that, but I'm getting help."

Natalie narrowed her eyes at John, "She talked you into this didn't she!" she snapped, "Trying to change you! Why doesn't she just see that you're fine the way you are, I love this John."  
"I don't…" he mumbled, "This isn't who I am."  
"Yes it is! You are a police officer you save people, you save me."  
"I'm more than just a cop Natalie, at least I want to be more than that. Evangeline sees that in me."  
"The hell she does John! She just wants you to be someone she can parade around on her arm show off to her family and friends. Like some damn project."  
"Stop it! Stop it now!" He snapped, "Like I said all those months ago you know nothing about Evangeline, you know nothing about Evangeline and I! So stop insinuating that you do." John growled.  
"Oh please, I know all about her high and mightiness. She comes into this town prancing around in her designer clothes, waving her fancy degree around and you fall at her feet like she's some damn Goddess or something."

John smiled a weary smile and looked up at her, "I get it… I finally get it." He said laughing to himself.  
"What!" Natalie snapped getting angry her face bright red from the beer and her confrontation with John.  
"You're jealous…" he said laughing.  
"The hell I am! She can't compare to me and you know it. You're just running from your feelings for me, running back to her bed."  
"I'm done with this conversation. I honestly thought that we could talk as adults, but I'm sorely mistaken. Natalie what you thought we had wasn't. You are right I was running from my feelings." He said walking past her to the door, "But not my feelings for you, my feelings for Evangeline. I'm going to tell you this for the last time. I'm in love with Evangeline and nothing you do will change that." He said sadly.

"The hell it wont!" she snapped grabbing his arm and spinning him around. She pulled John into her chest and opened her mouth and planted it over his. Forcing her tongue down his throat she grabbed the back of his head and held him in the kiss.

Evangeline raised an eyebrow and looked at Nora with a curious grin, "Me? What about me?"  
"I want you to promise me something Evangeline, I mean absolutely swear to me this one thing before we talk and get back what we've missed out over the past months.  
Evangeline reached out and held Nora's hand with her good hand, "What anything…" she said nervously.  
"That you will not only be completely honest with me about some things I have to ask you but honest with yourself. I can see the pain in your eyes something is eating away at you and until you can face it, and really open up about all the pain then you can't heal. So honesty is the name of the game today okay?"

Evangeline pulled back and let out a deep sigh, "Okay… I think I can do that. "She said smiling slightly at her.  
"Good, how are you really? I mean physically, not emotionally."  
"I'm okay, still banged and bruised and stuff they gave me some medicine for my foot and wrist, but I don't need them as much as I first thought I would."  
"Okay good… I can't be worrying about your physically health when your heart is in what a million confused pieces right now I'm assuming."  
"I've missed you so much!" Evangeline said laughing softly.  
"I'm sure you have. Okay well we know your body is okay for the time being how about that heart of yours?"

Evangeline raised her hand and placed it softly over her chest and smiled faintly at Nora, "You're right still in a million pieces. I can't do it Nora…" she mumbled holding back tears.  
"Do what hun?"  
"Let him go, I know I deserve better I know I need better but there is this pull that he still has over me after all these months. Even after he was with her, he still gets to me." She said as tear fell down her cheeks.  
"It's not easy to get over the love of your life Van."  
Evangeline shook her head, "I thought he was, I really thought he was the one Nora, but now I know he's not. He can't be… how can he love me when he doesn't even love himself?"  
"I don't know about John and I'm not going to claim to know about him. Like I said I want to talk about you sweetie and how you are handling everything. I've been gone a long time and you haven't had anyone to talk to about all this."  
"Oh I had Cris and Layla to talk about it."  
"Cris! What!"  
"Oh that's right you've haven't been around. Apparently the man that came back and we all thought was an imposter turned out to be the real Cris Vega and John knew the whole time. I worked to get him out of jail, now he's free and living the life that was robbed from him."  
"With Natalie?"  
Evangeline shook her head no, "She divorced him…"  
"Wow… I really have been out of it, so you say Cris has been helping you get over John."

Evangeline fell back on the couch and pulled her good leg up to her chest, "He tried, we've had fun times and stuff, but no… I can't get over John no matter how hard I try."  
"That should tell you something sweetie."  
"How can I be with him, I don't even know him and he doesn't even know me. I mean I told Todd more about myself in those short days we were together than I've ever told John."  
"Todd, I see… well you two were in a life or death situation unsure if you would survive. Of course you two would become close, but that doesn't negate your feelings for John."  
"Oh no! I never said that. It's just that Todd took an interest in me, in what makes me, me… John never did that."

Nora smiled and blew out a slow breath and shifted in her wheelchair as she looked over her friend. It had been months upon months that they've been separated and she had changed so much. The strong determined woman that she knew still sat in front of her but now that exterior was cracking and the vulnerability was showing through. Was this all of Todd Manning's doing, or was some thing else at play. "He told you right?"  
"Yeah… like I said in the hospital it's not enough. It will never be enough. I deserve more, I deserve unconditional love and support, I deserve to be put first in his life if he truly loved me and as long as Natalie is around that will never be the case."

"Okay say he cuts off ties with Natalie, then what?"  
"He still has issues that prevent him from opening up to him."  
"We could say the same about you counselor."  
"Objection, relevance."  
"Overruled…" Evangeline blew out a frustrated breath and let Nora make her point, "All I'm saying is that you want John to open up to you… to share what keeps him that dark and brooding man yet you won't do the same."  
Evangeline looked away from her friend biting her lower lip. Nora had a point, she never shared with John the things she shared with Todd. "You kept him a bay just like he did to you. You both are guilty of closing off from one another."  
"I tried!" Evangeline snapped.

"No you didn't! The man risked life and limb for you, said those three words that you longed to hear, and from the looks of things is trying to win you back, but you don't believe it. You don't trust him…"  
"I can't Nora! After all the crap he did to me. You honestly expect me to just fall back in line with him like nothing changed?" she said angrily.  
"No, and I never said that, but I know you Evangeline. You're not the type to walk away from a fight. John's fighting to get you back, he's fighting to show you that you're love that deep down love that you yourself have admitted you can't get over is enough to start with. It's enough to work through to build a connection, a foundation that could make you two the most powerful couple ever yet you run and hide from it. You two are more alike then either of you know." Nora said laughing.  
"We are not!" Evangeline said narrowing her eyes into tiny slits.

Todd set the glass back on the bar and stared at Blair as she cried in her hands and stumbled backwards to the couch. Falling down she looked up at Todd who stood stoic over her, "I love you Manning, nothing or no one can change that. Why can't you just forgive me so we can be a family again?"

Todd shook his head and smiled weakly at her, "I want out Blair… I can't do this any more. You don't know what love his, hell I'm not even sure I know what love is."  
"You do too!" She snapped getting angry now, "You love me, you love our kids. Everything we do to each other and for each other is because we love each other. We are loyal to a T- Todd Manning!" she said yelling at him.  
"Oh I know all about loyalty Blair and it's not a trait that you possess. Evangeline now on the other hand, she is loyal to a T."  
"I'm sick of hearing about Evangeline. Evangeline this, Evangeline that! She wasn't always there for you Todd, not like I am and not like I will always be."  
"You there for me are you kidding me. You jumped into bed with Spencer the moment you found out that I was going to death row. I'm sick of rehashing this. I just came to see about Starr and Jack. We are done Blair, there isn't anything you can say or do to change that."

"We are meant to be Todd and you know that!" she said heated grabbing at his arm.  
"Stop." Todd said shaking free, "We used to be Blair, but now… I don't know. I can't say that I can ever trust you again, that I can believe in us again."  
"I'll prove to you that we are supposed to be together Manning, I'll fight."  
Todd laughed as he drank the last of his drink, "So now you want to fight. When it suits you that's when you'll fight huh?"  
"That's not what I'm doing Todd and you know it! We are a family and there is no way in hell I'm letting you walk out on this family for some alleged feelings you have for Evangeline. Damn it Manning she was paid to belief in you nothing more nothing less!" she screamed.

Todd smiled and shook his head, "Fight all you want Blair but it's not going to work. I'm going to find a place to stay and Starr and Jack are going to come stay with me. What we have is over." He said sadly.  
"The hell they are! You're not taking my kids from me Todd. I'll fight, be prepared to fall back in love with me Manning." She grinned and then turned to run up the stairs.  
Turning around she stared at him, "You can't honestly say in your heart that you don't love me. Think about it Todd. We've been through hell and back to be together, and you're just going to through it all away like that!"

Todd shook his head and looked over at the guard and raised his eyebrows as he poured himself another drink, "Women…"

"Excuse me…" Dr. Crosby said standing in the middle of John's office, "I didn't mean to interrupt."  
John forced Natalie off of him and glared at her as he wiped his mouth, "Don't you ever…" he hissed leaning in to her  
"I was just coming to see if we were still on for our afternoon appointment McBain, but I see you're busy,"  
"No!" John said quickly, "Let's go." He walked after Dr. Crosby leaving Natalie still in his office dumbstruck that he left her yet again. Turning she grabbed the door and stormed out of the office her read hair swishing back along her back.

Dr. Crosby closed the door behind John as he took a seat and continued to wipe at his lips, "Sorry about that…"  
"Don't be…" John mumbled looking up at him.  
"Can I ask what that was about?"  
"You can ask but that doesn't mean I'm going to answer."  
"McBain, drop the damn wall. We were making progress what happened?"  
"That!" he said pointing to the door indicating he was talking about Natalie, "And Manning." John seethed.  
"Todd?"  
"Yes."  
"What about him?"  
"He's moving in on Evangeline. I'm…" he lowered his head into his hands.  
"You're what? Worried that he's going to hurt her, take your place in her heart?"  
"Yes… I think he already did." He said looking up at Dr. Crosby with tired eyes.

"What makes you think something like that?" He asked writing on a legal pad.  
John shifted in his chair and leaned back in it, "She's been intimate with him." He said softly.  
"Evangeline?"  
"Yes…"  
"Slept with Todd."  
"NO!" John snapped, "She shared her life with him, her fears…"  
"I don't understand what the problem is. You spent a year with her correct?"  
"Yes."  
"And I assumed that you both opened up and shared with each other her more likely than you."  
"No."  
"Okay… well now we have a place to start." Dr. Crosby said smiling and leaning back in his seat.

"A place to start?" John questioned looking at him with an inquisitive look on his face.  
"Yeah a place to start, you need to open up with me, with her, with yourself and let it all go. I'm assuming this closed off behavior started with your fathers death?" Dr. Crosby asked.  
John looked up at him and frowned, "Yes."  
"Good, well let's start there, you were ten right?"  
"Yes."  
"How did he die?"  
"He was shot and when they took him to the emergency room for surgery one of the doctors didn't know what they were doing and he died on the table."  
"How do you feel about that?"  
"I don't know…" John mumbled.  
"You have to have some feeling about it John. I'm guessing your father wouldn't have died if it wasn't for that surgeon?"  
John stared at the floor and then looked up at Dr. Crosby and let his eyes close as he blew out a soft sigh, "He wouldn't have died if I would have listened to him."  
"I don't understand?"  
"It was my fault all of it was my fault." He said with a shaky voice.

"We are not alike Nora and I resent that statement." Evangeline said glaring at Nora.  
Nora smiled and reached out to touch her hand, "It's okay for you to admit something like that really it is. I mean it's not necessarily a bad thing Van."  
"It is! I don't hide my feelings, I don't run from them."  
"What do you call what you have with Todd, a convicted Rapists and murderer?"  
"He didn't do it! The murder at least, Margaret is still alive."  
"Okay fine… but he's done the other things and you are opening up to him, when you should be doing that with John."

"What is this thing with you and John? I mean not only you have changed your opnion of him but so has Layla and Cris. You three were adamant that I get over the man, now you're playing his champion!"  
"I saw the way he reacted to your disappearance and supposed death. He was lost with out you."  
"So! I mean we haven't been together since before you got sick. You were the one that told me I needed to get over him. Cris hates the man for what he did to Natalie, and Layla hated the way he treated me."  
"True, but I've seen a change in him. He's working Evangeline he's working so hard. You need to give him a chance. Share with him your fears, your passions, your desires and everything in between." She said honestly.

"No…" she mumbled shaking her head, "It's not that easy. Some of the first words out of his mouth were I love you! I mean after all this time, all the crap he put me through he just opens up and says I love you Evangeline!"  
"Yeah and…"  
"And I can't handle it, I can't handle what loving him does to me Nora. It's all consuming yet I get nothing in return."  
"You do now… right?"  
"No I don't! He's still hiding from me, running from whatever it is that kept him locked in darkness for all those years."  
"He's working on it."  
"No…"  
"Dr. C?" Nora asked with a raised eyebrow. "Tell me about him."  
"The LPD's shrink. Bo made him go see this guy because of everything that happened to him, the KCM, the Music box murders, his dad, Caitlyn all of it not to mention that John shot a guy and killed him while the guy held Michael hostage."  
"Oh god! Is Michael okay?"

"He's fine…" Evangeline said faking a smile, "In shock but fine now… It hit John really hard, I mean he lost his gun and badge because of it."  
"Wow Van hun… so now he's seeing this Dr. C to get his job back?"  
Evangeline smiled and shook his head, "No he has his gun and badge back, he was supposed to be on the plane too Nora. I honestly don't know why he's seeing Dr. Crosby."  
Nora laughed and rolled her eyes, "For being one of the most smartest woman I know you sure are slow at times. He's doing it for you Evangeline! For you! TO get you back damn…"  
"No he's not." Evangeline mumbled staring down at the ground.  
"Why can't you believe that he would do something so drastic to get you back?"  
Evangeline laughed throwing her head back and then looked over at Nora with a _you've got to be kidding me look_ "You're not serious Nora! You've known John longer than I have. The man does not do grand gestures of anything. He's subtle."  
"So he's subtly working his way back into your heart, making you see that he loves you with everything right?"  
"No… I don't know why he's seeing Dr. Crosby but it's not because of me, or him for that matter." 

"Okay step out of the box here for a minute Evangeline. What if he is, what if he is doing all of this for you. Learning to open up so that he can be the man that you deserve?"  
Evangeline looked away holding her breath and then turned back to back to her friend. "He wouldn't… would he?" she said staring at Nora.  
"He would and I bet you anything he is. He loves you hun and he's going to show you."  
Evangeline let off a light laugh and shook her head, "You hungry? I'm hungry."  
"Oh nice change of subject…" Nora said rolling her eyes as Evangeline hobbled on her crutches to the kitchen, "This isn't going to change the topic at hand! We still have to talk about what's keeping you from opening up from John!" Nora called.  
"Whatever!" 

Dr. Crosby sat his pen down and looked at John shaking his head, "It's not your fault John."  
"It is, if it wasn't for me he would still be live."  
"No if it wasn't for that doctor that operated on your father for the man that shot your father, he would still be alive. I don't understand where this is coming from McBain."  
"I know what happened that night, and it's my fault. It's always my fault. From my dad's death to Caitlyn's death and everything that happened with Natalie, and why Evangeline left me."

Dr. Crosby stood up and walked around his desk and sat in the chair across from John, "Speaking of Natalie, I want to address that subject."  
"I thought we were talking about my dad."  
"We are, your sense of loss around your father and your fiancé is why you do the things you do. Why you claim to love one woman yet you can't let go of Natalie. What is it she means to you?"  
"She's a friend or so I thought she was a friend."  
"What makes you say that, you were with her right?"  
"Can we please talk about something other than Natalie?" John asked exasperated.  
"No we can't! We are talking about Natalie now, you feel guilty and responsible for her I see that. But Cris is back yes?"  
"Yes…" John mumbled.  
"Well, what's the problem? I don't get it… you want Evangeline you have admitted that to me, to her and to Natalie I assume, so why do you feel the need to keep up this thing with her."  
"I care about her damnit!" John snapped.  
"So you care, but are you in love with her?"  
"NO! I'm in love with Evangeline I've told you that! Damn it…" he said pacing back and forth, "I've tried to end things with Natalie she just won't get the hint that it's Evangeline that I want. No matter what I do she is there in my face."

Dr. Crosby laughed and stared at John as he walked back and forth, "I see that… but you play into it. I saw you two earlier… you knew that we had a meeting yet you still gave her the time to plead her case again. Let her go John, move on man."  
"I'm trying! You don't know how hard I've tried to. I tell her that I want Evangeline, that there is nothing between us yet she is still in my face!" John snapped.

"Well then… sounds like she needs to be seeing me as well." Dr. Crosby laughed.  
John smirked and sat back down, "You know I see my dad."  
"What do you mean you see him?"  
"He comes to me, we talk… "  
"About what?"  
"Letting go, changing, living everything really."  
"How often John?"  
"Every once in a while, he's always there when I need him. I don't know he just shows up."  
"Where?"  
"At the gym, in my office… where ever."  
"Okay John… so you see your dad and he's telling you to let go and move on, why can't you do it?"  
"I don't know, I want to. I want to let go of him, of all of it but at the same time I can't. I can't move on in my life I'm scared."  
"Of what?"  
"Losing her."   
"Evangeline?"  
"Yeah." John mumbled.

"So if you let go move on with Evangeline you're afraid you will lose her why?"  
"All of my stuff everything that keeps me from her isn't pretty and if I tell her, if I open up with her she will leave."  
"Why?"  
"Because I'm responsible for my dad and Caitlyn's death, I'm afraid that if she knows she'll leave…"  
"But she doesn't know and she is still gone."  
"True."  
"So what's the harm in talking with her about it because John, technically you don't have her."  
"I do, she still loves me I know she does, it's just a matter of us opening up. Becoming intimate really intimate sharing, talking about everything."  
"Well start… that's why I'm here McBain, open up to me. Explain things to me tell me why you feel guilty about your dad's death. What are you holding back?"

John stared at Dr. Crosby and then at the floor, "Everything… I'm holding back everything dammit." He mumbled.

Evangeline sat against Nora's sofa laughing at the movie that Nora had turned on, "I can't believe them!" Evangeline said laughing as she covered her mouth.  
Nora smiled at her friend and then sat down her glass, "I'm tired I hate to do this, but a girl needs her rest."  
"Oh no! I'm sorry I shouldn't have kept you. Get your rest I'm going to hang here and watch some tv and worry about Todd, that's all I can do right now anyways."  
"What do you want for dinner?" Nora asked as the nurse came out and wheeled her up the small ramp.  
"I'll do dinner Nora don't worry about it!" Evangeline said waving her hand in the air.  
"Okay, something greasy okay I've missed greasy!"  
"Deal." Evangeline said giggling.

John stood in the hallway to Dr. Crosby's office emotional exhausted. He had said so much but at the same time said so little. It wasn't that he couldn't or wasn't ready to spill his guts, it was who he was spilling his guts too. Evangeline had invested so much into their relationship as she said she really did do all the heavy lifting that he owed her that much to talk to her about his dad, Caitlyn and everything else he held back from her.

Hopefully in doing so she will feel comfortable sharing and opening up with him, as John walked down the hallway and out of the station he sunk his hands into his pockets and looked out into the world. It was a new day for him, and a new day for her as well.

He rounded the corner to the diner to grab a cup of coffee before he started in on trying to prove to Evangeline that he deserved her and he was the man and could be the man that would love her through everything. He greeted the waitress and got his coffee and then headed out the door. Bumping in to his brother on the sidewalk he looked Michael up and down, "Hey bro!" Michael said smiling at him.  
"Mikey, how's it going?"  
"Good, guess what."  
"What's that?"  
"I finally asked Marcie to marry me and she said yes!"  
"Oh that's great man! I'm happy for you." John said giving Michael a quick hug.  
"Yeah I know… Did it just a few moments ago man, she's in heaven so am I."  
"That's great, where is my future sister and law."  
"She had to run into the PD for something, said she would meet me here. You wanna stick around and have lunch with us, celebrate?"  
"Can't man… I have some plans."  
"With?"  
"No one actually, I'm trying to get my life back in order."  
"By?" Michael shaking his head.

John smirked, "Getting Evangeline back." He called as he started to walk away.  
"What!"  
"I'll explain later I've got to get some place."  
"Okay…"

"Evangeline Williamson…" She said answering her cell phone.  
"Princess!" Todd said in an enthusiastic greeting.  
"Todd, what's up? You and Blair okay?"  
"I'm fine thanks for asking. I called you place and no one answered are you okay?" He said dodging the Blair question.  
"Fine, I'm at Nora's she's home now."  
"Well that's great, I just wanted to give you my room number at the Palace in case you needed anything."  
"Sure, let me grab a pen." She cradled the phone on her shoulder and found a pen and paper and quickly jotted down Todd's room number.  
"So I guess that means we're not having dinner huh?"  
"No, I'm sorry I really want to spend time with Nora. Tomorrow night?"  
"Yeah sure that's fine. Get some rest Princess, I don't want you getting worse because you can't seem to stop going."  
"I will Todd and I have a call in to Hugh's office to see what the hold up is on the official dismissal of your charges."  
"Thanks… talk to you later?'  
"Yeah Later." Evangeline snapped her phone shut and threw it next to her on the couch.

She turned back to the television propping her foot up on a bunch of pillows and her arm on some as well. Slowly she drifted off to sleep as the television played softly in the background.

"Thanks for seeing me, Mr. Frisby." John said shaking the man's hand. Craig Frisby an African American man in his late forties with salt and pepper hair stood in front of John with a frown on his face.  
"What can I help you with Mr. McBain?"  
"Please John, I was wondering if you had any apartments for rent. See I'm trying to make a few changes in my life and I a new place would be the best place to start."

Mr. Frisby flipped through John's application and list of references and then a list of open apartments in the complex, "We do, and so far your application looks solid. You'll have to put down a security and first month's rent."  
"I've got that covered." John said grinning as he rocked back and forth on his heels.  
"Well then let me show you the place." Mr. Frisby turned to walk away and John reached out and grabbed his arm.  
"There's no need sir. I know what the place looks like."  
"Excuse me?"  
"Yes, I'm a police officer and when one of your tenant's apartments was broken into over the summer I was the responding officer."  
"Oh yes Ms. Williamson."  
"Yes she and I have a rather close relationship." He said smiling.  
"Oh okay… well then come with me and will get the paperwork started."

Back to Index

Chapter 11: Lost Souls 

"What are you doing here?" Paige gasped to see Margaret cloaked in black grinning at her. Margaret tossed her shades to the table to her left and undid her coat. "Nice place you have"

Paige looked around and saw that her cordless phone was on the coffee table closest to Margaret. "What do you want?" she asked her heart beating fast. She had learned of Spencer's death and she was trying to put it out of her mind.

She knew the crazy woman was running loose and she felt if she kept her nose clean she would not get caught for her part in the delivery of her child. She hoped anyway. Now with Margaret standing in her living room she knew that her world was about to fall apart.

Margaret laughed pulling off her gloves "Come on doctor you had to know that you'd see me again."

"I had nothing to do with whatever you and Spencer did. I want no parts out of this so you either go now, or I'll call the police!" Paige snapped her voice and hands shaking

"Whoa wait a damn minute!" Margaret said putting her hand up and leaning over to glare directly into Paige's eyes. The corners of her mouth curled up into a snarl baring her teeth. "You are in this up to your bony little neck and I'll snap it in two before I let you turn me in! Are we clear!"

"I..I."

Margaret chuckled to see her hesitation, she smelled fear on her and found it quite amusing. Dr. Miller will do her bidding she was sure of it. "Besides aren't I do for a follow up! I mean when Todd comes home, well you know he'll be expecting me to fufill all my wifely duties if you know what I mean"

Paige shook her head "You're crazy.."

Margaret raised an eyebrow "Dr. you have no idea" she sneered

"I can't help you"

Margaret tossed her long black curly hair and looked around the apartment then back at Paige "Now see, I happen to think you can. The sooner you start thinking the way I do Dr. Miller the healthier you'll be" she said sweetly

"You murdered Spencer.every cop in this state is looking for you!" Paige said frightened.

"And I'll kill you next if you play games with me!"

Paige wished she hadn't told Bo not to come over tonight. She desperately needed to find a way out of the mess. Frowning she looked at Margaret "Where's the baby?"

"He's safe! Now enough questions!" Margaret hissed coming toward her.

Paige turned to run to the kitchen to get the gun she kept hidden there. She'd gotten one after Spencer was found dead and hid it in the kitchen to keep it from being discovered by Bo. He never ventured in her kitchen and she lived in fear of this moment.

Margaret moved swiftly catching her by her short cropped blonde hair and yanking her back. Paige screamed in pain and falling into her captor swinging her arms behind her to claw her way free. Margaret grabbed her throat holding tightly with inhuman strength.

"Listen to me doctor! You get one shot at this, and if you fail.well let's just hope you don't fail" she said snickered.

"Please, I can't help you. There's nothing I can do for you!"

"You can help me, You can be my eyes and my ears. My beloved Todd is desperate for me and TJ, he needs us and I NEED him. So here's what you will do"

John sat on the roof of his hotel drinking beer and looking at the leasing agreement. Tomorrow was moving day and in the three years he lived in the rat hotel he called home, he owned nothing but a couple of suits and a busted TV. 

Smiling he felt a sense of relief, as if he was turning a corner. His father's death and then the loss of Caitlyn made him want for nothing really. When he met Evangeline and they spent a night of unexpected passion in Mary's basement something shifted. She touched apart of him that he forever kept closed off, and it wasn't the way she shared herself physically. It was the way she opened up apart of her life and gave him room to open a small part of his. Funny how he just realized that in this moment.

Now a 100 mistakes later he wanted to feel her in that way again. Yet this time he didn't want her physically but intimately. He realized that's what troubled him about her friendship with Manning. They were intimate.

Sighing he looked over to his right at his cell phone as he turned up his beer. She was at Nora's now probably getting ready for bed. Images of the nights they spent together came back over him and he once again wondered what he ever did right in this world to garner her love. 

He needed to reach her, and he needed to show her his life changes. He wanted the trust he lost when he bedded a woman he told her for over a year, meant nothing more to him than a friend. Gaining her trust again would be a bigger challenge than finishing training at Quantico. He chuckled at the thought.

Then his smile faded as images of Natalie came to mind. Today Natalie pulled one of her infamous stunts and he finally saw her for the immature tortured woman she is. Her lack of self respect or love had her as emotionally crippled as him. How he could ever think that the two of them could share anything of substance astounded him.

Dr. Crosby was right about him taking a stand. Tomorrow he would not only rise but jump at the opportunity of a new beginning. Leaning back in the chair the winter air chilled him but he didn't flinch. He put down the bottle and reached for his cell phone. Intimacy is what he wanted, he just had to figure out how to get it.

Evangeline finished dinner with her friend and they laughed as she caught her up on politics and celebrity gossip. Nora told her that Brad Pitt left Jennifer for Angelina, when she told her that Angelina Jolie was carrying his baby. Evangeline had to give her props for being right on that score.

The nurse came down to help Nora to bed and Evangeline assisted as best she could, she said her goodnights and thanked her friend again for coming back to her, and caring. Having Nora back was a sign to her that there was hope and life did go on. 

Now she lay on the bed in the guest room unable to sleep. She didn't really dwell on John and the promises that seem to be hollow to her. She thought about Todd, and what they went through. Todd Manning was the man that hurt her best friend and has terrorized this town on one or more occasions with his manipulative and deadly ways. But he was also her friend, and he was the only friend that she had that was solely focused on her protecting her.

She knew Nora, Layla and Christian meant well with being supportive. But Todd was giving her a chance to be selfish, to for once not be the bigger person, and believe in the greater good. She trusted him because he saved her life. He put her life before his own freedom. No one had ever gone that far for her.

Hearing her cell phone in her purse she reached for it opening it.

"Hello"

"Hey"

"John, it's late" she said quickly not in the mood for another debate with him over how they can start again.

"I know..sorry were you already gone to bed?"  
"No, why are you calling?"

John sat on the roof with the wind blowing his hair. He had finished his six pack and wanted to hear her voice "I was thinking about you. Well about us, and I don't want to argue, or debate what went wrong. I just want to talk."

"Talk about what?"

"You, something new or something old."

"John.." she sighed "I'm tired and."

Tell me something I don't know about you." 

Evangeline frowned "Something you don't know?"

"Yes, something that you never told me before" he said closing his eyes and envisioning her face. He remembered the first time he learned something new about her. He had forgotten it was valentines day and she was again saying that he was keeping his heart guarded from her.

Tired of the debate he went to the bar to get something to drink. That's when he heard her. He turned to see the woman he thought he had pegged, reveal something remarkably enchanting about herself. She sang her way into his heart. 

Swallowing his guilt he remembered how beautiful she was and how he never even asked her where she got the talent from. Who taught her to sing like that, had she sang always? He just took what she gave so freely, selfishly. That was one bad habit he was determined to break.

"I'm tired, can we table this for another."

"Please Van, talk to me..tell me something, anything. Hey I got it, tell me something about your life in Philly. Even better, tell me what you did after  
you graduated from high school" he rushed out quickly trying anything at this point to initiate dialogue with her. It sounded corny but he knew she must have graduated top of her class and the memory of that day with her father should be a cherished one. He thought it was a safe enough question.

Evangeline sighed "What is this about?"

"Come on, we all did something to celebrate graduating, what did you do?"

"Fine, I was valedictorian so my dad took me, my mom and Layla to Bennihana's to celebrate."

"Bennihana's hunh?"

"Yeah a Japanese restaurant. They cook your food hibachi style."

"So it was a special night, you becoming valedictorian. I bet your parents were proud."

"No." she said her voice drifting off.

John frowned "Why not?"

"My dad was upset"

"Why would he be upset?"

"My graduation speech, I froze, look I don't want to talk about this."

John was leaning back with his eyes closed listening to her story and opened his eyes to the tension he heard in her voice. She said she froze? That made no sense. One thing his beloved was, was a talker. He could never imagine seeing her freeze up. "Please Van don't stop, why did you freeze?"

Evangeline grew quiet and said nothing and John listened to the soft sounds of her breathing in the phone. "Hello..you there?"

"Yeah I'm here" she said sadly

"Why did you freeze?"

"My dad, he was so proud and he expected so much. I got up there and my classmates that I never really got to know because I spent all my time buried in a book snickered at me. I looked out at them and saw their happiness. They weren't happy because they'd graduated with a 4.0, or because they got a perfect score on the SAT's. They were happy because they were free, and in that moment I realized I wasn't, so I froze."

"Your dad was upset with you after that?" he asked

"That's putting it mildly. I made it up to him though; I always came through for my dad."

"Thank you for telling me that"

"Why?"

"Because I sat out here tonight and I thought of you. Not the you I know, but the you I want to know. I wanted to be intimate with you, and now I feel that I am."

"John, I don't know what you hope to accomplish but."  
"Good night Evangeline."

She smiled at the way he cut her off "Good night."

"Hey"

"Yes."

"That speech you were going to give, what was it called?"

"One moment in time."

"One moment in time." he repeated. "I like that, maybe you can give it to me one day."

"Good night"

"Night"

Hanging up the phone she looked at confused. That was the first time in a long time when he asked her about her, and it felt good. Looking back up to the ceiling she smiled slowly and then sighed. "One moment in time." she said softly then turned over to go to sleep.

Next Morning 

"Ms. Kramer you have a visitor" the guard Jason from below called up the stairs to her. Starr and Jack had left for school and Blair had just gotten dressed. She'd chosen a pair of designer jeans and low cut black v-neck sweater to wear. She was trying to put on something flattering for her ambush visit to Todd at the Palace. She wasn't about to give up on him. And she sure as hell wouldn't let this thing he had for his attorney progress any further.

"Thank you Jason, I'll be right down" she called out brushing through her long blonde curls that sprung back to life vibrantly.

Blair approving of her look turned and bounced out of her room heading down the spiral stairs. Her hand on the railing she stopped to look at her visitor frowning. Paige Miller was standing in her living room looking around suspiciously.

"Hello Dr. Miller"

"Blair I'm sorry if I'm disturbing you, I should have called first."

"No, its fine. I am surprised that you visited"

Paige smiled sweetly "Well I know that Todd has been released and I wanted to check in to see if everything was okay."

Blair came off the landing of the bottom step and folded her arms tilting her head. "Why would you care if we're okay?"

Paige swallowed. She needed information and she needed to remain calm when she got it. She didn't want to make Blair suspicious. "Well." she said moving around the living room casually opening her coat. "I was married to Spencer and he's dead. I know you two were."

"We weren't anything!" Blair snapped glaring at her "I stand to loose everything because of the way that man tricked me!" 

Paige frowned "So you believe he knew about Margaret?"

"Don't you?"

Paige chewed on her bottom lip "Why do you think he would help her?"

"I don't know! I don't care all I care about is Todd and finding away to get him back!"

Paige frowned "Back?"

Blair laughed "Look around Dr..do you see him?"

"Is he in jail?"

"No, but I might as well be, since he has sentenced me to a life sentence of banishment for ever trusting that monster!"

"He's left you?"

"Yes, and get this. He left me for his lawyer, now if that don't beat all" 

Paige eyes narrowed on Blair with suspicion "Evangeline? Todd and Evangeline?"

"That's right. I got a psycho killer lurking ready to pounce and two kids to protect but all he could think about is if that self-righteous legal eagle, and I have Spencer to thank for that!"

Evangeline stepped off the elevator with Todd. She got a call from Hugh this morning to have him brought to the station to sign release papers. Glad she brought some overnight clothes she showered and dressed heading to the police station in a cab.

Todd met her there of course and she got him officially released from prison. He wanted to go out to celebrate, but she just wanted to go home and rest. Coming off the elevator with her crutches she passed him the key to her place so he could open the door. Walking behind him she saw the door next to hers was open.

That condo had been empty for months and from the boxes outside of it she figured that she now had a new neighbor. Todd fidgeted with the keys complaining that he couldn't find the right one. "You are such a big baby" she laughed coming up and snatching the keys from his hand.

Todd looked at her and smiled putting his hands in her hair smoothing it. "Thanks Princess.." he said starting to thank her for helping today.

"It's the round silver one." a voice called out behind them interrupting his little moment.

They both turned around to see John standing in the hall with a box. He had on a black t-shirt and slacks and he smiled at them.

Todd looked him up and down and frowned "I thought they gave you back your badge? What you now a delivery boy to supplement that wasted salary of yours?"

"Morning to you too Manning"

Evangeline stared at him "What are you doing here?" 

"Moving."

"What?" Todd asked alarmed looking at the box he held.

"M-o-v-i-n-g" John said slowly giving Todd a imbecilic look.

Evangeline looked over to the empty apartment then at him "Are you serious?"

"You told me that I need to be a property owner. Decided to take your advice"

"So you move across from her? How pathetic!" Todd snapped

"No more pathetic than hanging around her like some love sick puppy. And what's with the cutesy names? The lady has double your IQ but you talk to her like she's four!" he said rolling his eyes.

"Jealous much?" Todd asked smirking

"No, manning I know what she likes to hear and."

"Okay enough!" Evangeline said putting her hand up. "You two stop"

Todd rubbed her back "Sorry, but this is really an invasion of your privacy. He's so desperate to control you that he moves across from you?"

John sucked his teeth and turned to go into his place. Evangeline moved on her crutches to follow him. "John why are you here? Why did you do this?" 

"To be near you, Manning is right. I am desperate. I'm desperate because you are constantly pushing me away. I plan to do everything in my power to win you back. I can't do that with you running away from me."

"I wasn't running."

"Okay, I can't do it with you walking away"

"This changes nothing." she said turning and leaving out of his front door.

"We'll see!" he called out after her.

John watched her walk out and went to his door. He saw Todd open her condo door and hold it as she walked in. He looked up at John and smirked then went in behind her. John grinded down on his teeth and went back into his place slamming his door.

Natalie walked into the station heading straight to John's office. She was going to finish what they started last night. Seeing the lights off and the blinds drawn she sighed turning to leave.

"Looking for someone?" Dr. Crosby asked coming up with a folder in his hand, her personnel folder. He was glad she arrived today since it looked like she was keeping her own schedule. With the ongoing false arrests and stress levels at the LPD, his office had received clearance from the Mayor and Commissioner to clean house, jobs and all.

"Not you!" she snapped trying to walk around him.

"We need to talk Natalie" he said preventing her escape.

"What? No! Get out of my way" she said dismissively tossing her red hair.

"I'm not asking for your permission. Now shall we" he said opening John's door and allowing her to enter.

Natalie glared at him and then walked in. Dr. Crosby walked in behind her flipping on the light to see her toss her purse on John's desk. She faced him bobbling her inflated head and glared at him with her cold blue eyes. "What the hell is this about?"

"Its about you Ms. Vega, see I've been charged with the task of making this place a better working environment for the officers here. I am also in the position of dealing with work assignments and details. Now.." He said opening the folder he was carrying "I've been reviewing your file and the ongoing search and rescue missions you help create for Lt. McBain, and this force."

"I what?"

Dr. Crosby looked up at her "You heard me."

"Now wait a.."

"I think that your talents have been wasted here in the bullpen. I think that we can use you elsewhere"

"I work for my uncle Bo"

"Not anymore, effective immediately you will be working with dispatch on the third floor. If that assignment doesn't work out during your probationary period we will have to let you go. Carla, I believe that's her name, has been filling in for you since the prison riot, while you find yourself?" he asked frowning.

"Uncle Bo knows I've been through a lot!" she shouted at him her eyes tearing and her head bobbing from side to side frantically.

"That's right, you've been kidnapped forced to wear a bomb, buried alive, held hostage in a prison riot. I'd say me and you should be in sessions wouldn't you agree."

"My uncle runs this police force, there is no way in hell you can reassign me!"

"Your uncle is a civil servant Ms. Vega, I not only can reassign you, but if I find out that you can't handle the new gig, I'll fire you!"

"You can't do that!"

"I just did" Dr. Crosby said turning to walk out. He didn't pull her off her current job assignment because of McBain; he actually did it for her own good. She had created more turmoil and conflict in here with her presence, than the dangerous men downstairs in lockup. Besides it was his job to clean house. Natalie Vega was the trash that needed to be swept up.

Paige came back in to find Margaret at the window looking out of it. Her jet black hair was unnerving it gave her an Elvira type of appeal. Paige just wanted her out of her place and far away from her. Margaret turned and fixed her icy brown eyes on Paige. "What took you so long!" she said in a low angry voice.

Closing the door and locking it she looked at Margaret with disgust. She shouldn't be helping her but she was in too deep to turn back now. "After I give you this information you promise to leave, right?"

"I won't make any promises to you!" 

"Look, you can't stay here. The commissioner is my boyfriend, he has a key Margaret. You can be discovered at any moment." She said desperately

"What did you find out?"

"Todd left Blair"

"You're lying!"

"Lying? Wasn't it you last night talking about how hot he was for your body!" Paige said incredulously. 

"He wouldn't leave Blair unless he knew I forgave him and wanted him back!" Margaret said angrily advancing on the doctor. "You're setting me up!"

"NO!" Paige said stepping back "He left her because she slept with Spencer!"

Margaret stopped and smiled "Oh, she did, did she?"

"Yes, and he's apparently found a new love" Paige said nodding; wanting to give Margaret any reason to direct her anger at someone other than herself.

Margaret whose head was turned as she grinned at the good news swung around angrily. "What did you say?"

"He's with his attorney Evangeline Williamson; Blair says they have something going on"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY!" Margaret shrieked scaring the hell out of Paige and charging at her, Paige backed up terrified ready to receive her wrath.

"Can you believe that guy?" Todd asked watching Evangeline move over to the sofa and sit.

Evangeline sighed "Can we not talk about him."

"Of course." he said going over and sitting down next to her. "What I started to say before he interrupted us earlier was thanks."

She looked at him confused "Stop thanking me." she said shaking her head and looking away.

"What? I will not. I owe you more than thanks for believing in me, and seeing me through all of this. Today was great and I owe my life to you"

"You owe it to the truth. You didn't kill anybody" she said smiling "I just did what any lawyer would do"

"No it was much more than that. It was deeper than that. You were the only person who believed in me, and I must say that your belief is what helped me survive that crash and carry you through that storm. Because I could never let a gem like you suffer or die. The loss would be to great."

Evangeline looked over at him. "Todd that's beautiful" she said surprised.

He reached and touched the side of her face "You're beautiful" he said in a low seductive voice letting his eyes wash over face and then lower to her exposed breasts that heaved with quick breaths she was taking.

She reached and touched his hand "What are you doing?"

"Fantasizing." he said softly

"Well fantasy over" she said smiling removing his hand.

Todd stared at her wanting to speak and decided not to push. Evangeline looked away to avoid what she saw in his eyes.

"So what do you want to do now?" Todd asked.

"For you to go home and work on things with Blair" she said looking back at him.

"I got a better idea, how about I fix you something to eat?"

Evangeline frowned "You cook?"

"Nah, but I'm sure you got some sandwich meat or something" he said heading for the kitchen. Evangeline smirked and watched him. She felt safe with him around and she couldn't explain it. Looking toward the door to her place she thought of John leasing the condo outside of hers, she felt safe with him there too. What was going on with her?

John opened the door and smiled at his brother "What's up bro?"

"Please tell me this is some kind of joke" Michael said coming inside

"Nope, check out my new space." he said closing the door.

"You leased the place across he hall from your ex?"

"Something wrong with that?" John asked casually.

"Wrong? Hey I don't know if it's wrong, but damn sure is strange"

John laughed "Want a beer?"

"No, does Evangeline know?"

"Yeah, she just left to entertain her new side kick"

"Side kick?"

"Todd Manning, apparently she can't take a step forward without him at her side, to battle off the evil me that may be lurking to steal his princess." John said irritated.

Michael frowned "When did that happen?"

"Crash, rescue, somewhere in between there" John said smiling drinking his beer.

"Why are you smiling?"

John lowered the beer "Because I finally see the light at the end of this damn dark tunnel I've been in since dad died"

"You do?"

"Last night I spoke to her and I realized something"

Michael walked around taking note that his brother was in desperate need of a decorator. The fold out chairs and TV on the crate would have to go. He didn't bother to look in the bedroom, he was sure it was as aesthetically pleasing as the rest of the place.

"What did you realize?" he asked turning around and staring at his brother.

"What she needed, and how I needed the same. It's just a matter of time." He said smirking drinking down his beer. Glancing back at his front door he smiled "Only a matter of time"

Christian went to the door of his loft and pulled it back. Layla stood with a brown bag holding it up in front of her "Hungry?"

He looked at the bag and then her "What is it?"

"Let me in and find out?"

Christian stepped to the side and let her walk in. He closed the door and watched her carry the food to the counter. Layla was wearing a dark chocolate three quarter inch leather jacket with a soft lavender v-neck sweater and jeans underneath. She pulled the long multicolored scarf from around her neck and tossed her hair to look back at him. "I hope you're in the mood for Chinese" 

Christian smiled looking her over, she was Evangeline's sister, but they couldn't be more different. Her bold approach was refreshing. "Why are you here Layla, seriously?"

"Because I saw you the other day, you look like a man that's making changes in his life. I happen to have a thing for boxers; I find the sport to be you know, cool."

Christian smiled and walked toward her "You find it cool hunh?" he asked moving into her space. Layla now pressed against the breakfast bar looked up into his brown eyes. She smiled slyly. "Extremely" she said softly

After lunch Todd got a call from Blair that she was in trouble, asking that he meet her at the Palace. Evangeline saw the panic in his face when he got the call and told him to go. He tried to tell her that he just wanted to make sure they were okay. Evangeline smiled sweetly, she knew better. Todd didn't see it pass his hurt but he loved his family, which meant he loved Blaire. 

Telling him to call her later she walked him out. Her foot feeling a little better since the swelling had gone down from the sprain made her able to move around without her crutches so much. Picking up the plates with her free hand she limped into the kitchen. 

As she put the dishes in the sink she heard knocking at her door. Figuring it was Todd she moved as quickly as she could to open it. Turning the lock she pulled the door open to see John.

He stood before her, leaning in the door frame smiling. "Can I borrow some sugar?"

Evangeline laughed in spite of herself. "It's a cup of sugar and where is your mug?" she asked looking at his hands.

"Don't need a mug!" he said grabbing her and kissing her by surprise. Evangeline eyes grew wide at the kiss and then fluttered as his tongue slid inside her mouth. 10 seconds into it she pushed away and swung to slap him. John caught her hand. "Don't ruin a kiss that way!" he said smiling.

Snatching her hand she glared at him. "You and I need to get a few things straight!"  
John nodded "Yeah we do" he said coming in.

She stepped back and glared at him slamming her door. One minute she wanted to kill him and the next she wanted to be in his arms. He turned to look at her challengingly and she shook her head "Why do you keep doing this?"

"Are you ready to listen, because I want to tell you."

She shook her head and looked away "John, you can't keep forcing yourself on me."  
'It's not what I'm doing?"  
"Then what do you call it?"  
John walked toward her. "You think its my ego, or my new obsession. You think I want to control you or just win you from your new suitor. It's deeper than that. You're apart of me and for the first time since we decided to attach strings, I'm going fight to prove it."

She looked at him shocked and he smiled "Now about that sugar?"

Margaret sat outside of attorney Evangeline Williamson's place. She saw Todd come racing out of the front and the tears began to flow

"Todd! How could you turn to another woman? Do you really feel that lost without my love?" she whimpered.

Watching him start the car she looked up at the building "You want have him bitch! I'll take care of you!" she said starting her car and pulling away to follow Todd. Wiping at her tears she gripped the steering wheel. She would fix this if it's the last thing she'd do

Back to Index

Chapter 12: Lost Souls 

"What are you doing!" Layla giggled as she sat across from Cris eating the Chinese she brought for them.  
"These damn chopsticks. How do you know how to use those?"  
"My dad." Layla said smiling as she slipped some lo mein noodles into her mouth. She chewed them and winked at Cris as he fought with the chopsticks, "Do I seriously have to use these!" He said throwing them across the island.  
"Oh come on, Cris be good and use them. Here…" Layla put her chopsticks down and picked up his and handed them back. "You put your finger and your thumb like this." She said demonstrating the proper technique.

Cris laughed and so did Layla as they rolled off his fingers onto his plate, "You want me to have fun right? That's why you came here."  
"Yeah, and a girl's gotta eat." She said chomping down on her food.  
"Then let me use a fork." Cris whined.  
"Fine, go ahead and be a baby, use a fork." She said looking up from him with her mouth half full.  
"I'm not a baby, just smart!" He snapped and reached for a fork behind him. "Much better." He mumbled slurping up the noodles.  
"Whatever, you're loss!" She shot with a soft smile.

Cris winked at her and they continued to eat laughing as Layla's food rolled off her chopsticks, "Want a fork? It's much easier." He said grinning.  
"No these are fine thanks. So tell me about this boxing thing."  
"What about it?"  
"I mean like when's your first match?"  
"In a few days why?"  
"Just wondering that's all. So you're really into this boxing thing huh?"  
"Yeah, why does that surprise you?"  
"Just didn't think you would want to damage those hands of yours." She asked with a raised eyebrow.

Cris dug into the cartons pulling out more food on to his plate and smiled, "My hands are fine, thanks for wondering though."  
"Well I know how much you like painting too."  
"Yeah that's the old Cris. This is the new one, who boxes."  
"If you say so, but I've seen your work Cris and it's fabulous."  
"Again the old Cris. The one sitting here having lunch with you is the new Cris."  
"Oh, what the does the ex-wifey think of this?"  
"She doesn't want me to box, but it's none of her concern anymore." He said softly.  
Layla looked at him and a small smile crept across her lips as she drank her water.  
"What's the smile for Layla?" Cris asked grinning at her.  
"Nothing, nothing at all, can you pass me the egg rolls." She said looking at them sitting next to him.

Cris picked them up and handed to them to her, their fingers brushed and she pulled back quickly, "Thanks."  
"No problem. So shouldn't you be at work or something."  
"Mental Health day."  
"What!" he asked confused.  
"My mental health is being jeopardized at the moment, I needed a day to regroup."  
Cris laughed and shook his head, "That's something I've never heard before. How is your mental health being threatened?"  
"Manning."  
"Todd?"  
"Yeah the man is all over my sister. It's disgusting." She said shaking her head.  
"He saved her life Layla."  
"And for that I'm grateful but he can go back to his wife and kids now and stop hanging all over my sister. You know he tried to move in with us." She said annoyed.  
Cris coughed on his water as it trickled down his face. Layla laughed and threw him a towel that sat next to her. He winked at her and wiped his mouth, "Thanks, but Manning what!"  
"Yeah he tried to move in with us. I can't believe him. We got into it about that too. Then John came over."  
"McBain and Manning in the same room, I'm sure that wasn't pretty."

Layla stood up and dumped her plate in the trash and turned to look at Cris with a hand on her hip, "Ugly would be an understatement. Those two have such hate for each other it's not even funny."  
"The one thing they do have in common is your sister."  
"You too." She said smiling.  
Cris nodded and handed his plate to Layla, "She's an amazing person."  
"Don't you think I know that?" Layla said smiling.  
"She has this way of making you fight even when you think there is no fight left and all hope seems to be gone."

Layla followed Cris over to the small couch and tucked her feet up under her, "That's my sister for you. She can create miracles."  
Cris looked her up and down and smiled, "What was it like."  
"What?'  
"Growing up with Evangeline as an older sister what was it like."  
"Why do you care?" Layla smirked as she narrowed her eyes on him.  
"I care because I care about Evangeline and you for that matter. So what was it like to grow up with her?"  
"You mean grow up in her shadow?"  
"Was it that bad?"  
"No…" Layla said quietly, "Just difficult at times. I mean how would you feel being the younger sister to an accomplished dancer, pianist, singer, and some who get straight A's all the time."  
"That rough huh?"  
"Not all the time, I love my sister don't get me wrong. She means the world to me and when I thought I lost her I couldn't fathom not being able to talk to her, make fun of her, have her boss me around. Just the idea was painful enough." She said holding back tears. Layla turned her head and wiped at the corner of her eyes, "Sorry." She mumbled staring at the wall.

Cris touched her shoulder and she turned around to force a smile, "No need. I don't know what I would have done if I lost Antonio or thought I lost him." He said softly as he squeezed her shoulder.  
"Thanks Cris… "  
"Hey don't mention it." He said smiling at her.  
Layla smiled back and bit the inside of her lip as his lips parted showing that soft half smile he loves to give.

Evangeline stood staring at John his blue eyes sparkling as they roamed over her body. She felt exposed under his intense glare and draped her arms over her chest. "Stop doing that." She said shaking her head.  
"What?"  
"That look. That damn look." Evangeline moved past him favoring her good leg and took a seat on the couch.  
"What look?" John questioned standing over her sliding his hands in his pockets and rocking back and forth.  
She looked up at him, his mouth in a half smile his eyes glistening with love, the love she had always seen when they were together but this time with more fire, more fight behind it. "That damn look that makes me think you're undressing me with your eyes."  
"If I was?"  
"I would tell you to put the clothes back on me because there's no way you're ever going to see me like that again."  
"All I have to do is close my eyes." He whispered.

"Go!" she snapped pointing at the door.  
"Wait I'm sorry! I'm pushing, I promised myself I wouldn't and I'm going to promise you now that I won't push."   
"Too little too late for that John, now please go. I have a mountain of work to get caught up on."  
John shook his head and sat down next to her. Evangeline moved away from him pushing her back up against the arm of the couch as he stared at her, "I see that…. But shouldn't you take it easy? I mean you were in a plane crash for goodness sake."  
"That I was but I need my work."

John laughed and shook his head, "You and I are a lot alike." He said smiling up at her.  
"That's the second time I've heard that." She said rolling her eyes.  
"Maybe it's true. We both push ourselves too hard and when things get rough we dive into our work." He said fingering the files that sat on her ottoman.  
"It's not true, I can open up." She shot back.  
"Touché…." John mumbled staring down at the ground, "I guess I deserve that."  
"You do." Evangeline said shooting him daggers.  
"Doesn't mean that I can't change."  
"Yeah you can't, because you don't want to."  
"I do." He said now getting annoyed with her. "I'm changing for me, for you, for us." He said reaching for her hand.

Evangeline pulled her hand back crossing it over her chest and glared at him, "Bull… you don't care. If you did you would have opened up a long time ago."  
"I tired! Damn it, and now I'm trying again. I realized that when that plane went down and I didn't tell you everything that I was feeling that I might have just missed out on the best thing to ever happen to me."  
"I tried to tell you that."  
"Yeah and I didn't listen. I ran from you."  
"To Natalie."  
"This has nothing to do with her."  
"The hell it does John! You ran to her after I told you that I still loved you. You slept with her after everything that we shared. Do you know how that fells? To know that man you gave your heart and soul too, could just throw it away like that. Like it didn't matter." She said choking back tears.  
"I'm sorry… I don't know how to explain it all, I really don't."  
"Could you please just go John, I lived through this once and don't want to do it again."

John stared at her and saw her resolve, she was sick of the whole thing and so was he. He was sick of hiding from her, hiding all of it. John stood and stared pacing the room.  
"John I'm serious could you please just go!"  
He looked at her and ran a hand over his face and through his hair. He headed to the door and stopped at the site of it. It all came flooding back like a rush and caught him completely off guard. Walking to the to table he picked up and held it tightly in his hands.

Todd walked into the Palace in a huff searching for Blair. He saw her pacing in the lobby and their eyes locked, "What's wrong!" he said anxiously walking over to her.  
"Thank god you came."  
"What is it Blair, what do you want?"  
"You." She said smiling.

Todd glared at her and stared to walk away. She reached out and grabbed his arm pulling him back and kissed him hard on the mouth. Her thin nimble fingers ran through his blonde locks as she felt Todd give into the kiss, give into her. Pulling back she kissed him softly, "Now tell me you don't love me." She whispered kissing his lips over and over again.  
"Stop it!" he shouted pushing her away.

"Todd, I don't get it." She said wiping the corners of her mouth and staring up at him hurt.  
"Same ole Blair."  
"And you're the same ole Todd! So what! Come back to us and our family. We need you."  
"I need my kids yes, but you no." He said glaring at her as he wiped at his lips.  
"That's a load of crap and you know it."  
"The hell it is."  
"Then why are you here Todd?"  
"What?"  
"You came when I called why! If it's over between us then why did you come to me."  
"You said it was an emergency! I thought it was Starr or Jack."

Blair walked up to him running her fingers through his hair. Todd turned his head taking a step backwards and frowned at her, "You said it was an emergency." He said softly looking up at her.  
"Yet you still came to me because you love me. No matter how much you try to deny it Todd it won't work. You love me and I love you. You can't use Evangeline to try and drive a wedge between us. It won't work and you know it. I will always be here and so will Starr and Jack."

"Don't you dare use our kids to try and prove your point. I will always love them and there isn't any thing you can do to change that. I'm going. This was a set up, and I hate set ups." He snapped.  
Blair watched as Todd tried to walk around her and she stood in front of him, "Have a drink with. Let me prove to you that this can work Todd." She said squeezing his arm.  
Todd pried her fingers from around his arm and pushed her away, "No… I'm not playing these games with you any more Blair."  
"It's not a game damnit. We are supposed to be together!" She yelled after him.  
"If that's the truth then you wouldn't have slept with Spencer. You would have believed in us, in me!" he said turning to stare at her.  
"I'm sorry Todd okay. I've apologized already. I need you back Todd, I need us back. Just a drink, that's all I'm asking for."  
"I can't." he said sadly.

"Can't you Williamson's keep your hands to yourselves!" Natalie snapped slamming the heavy sliding door behind her.  
Layla jumped and Cris turned around to glare at her, "What are you doing here." Cris said standing up and walking over to her.  
"I came to talk, but I should be asking what is she doing here?" Natalie said her eyes rolling in her head as she pointed toward Layla.  
"Cris and I were just having lunch." Layla said with a bright smile as she rose from the couch.

"Lunch huh… what were you having?" Natalie asked scanning the small kitchen and living room.  
"Layla and I were having Chinese, what do you want Natalie!" Cris snapped getting her attention.  
"I needed to talk to you."  
"What did you find out that my sister and John are back together?" Layla questioned folding her arms over her chest as she stood next to Cris.  
"They are not!" Natalie squealed.  
"Oh I think they are and let me guess he told you that he didn't want you." Layla snapped rolling her neck and pointing at her.  
"I told him that I wanted Cris back!"  
"OH you did, did you?" Cris piped in.  
"Yeah, that's why I'm here Cris." She said softly touching his arm. "I want to work things out with us, with you. I want us back."

"He doesn't want you Natalie. Like he would want a spoiled rich brat like you."  
Natalie turned her head and glared at Layla, "I suggest you mind your own damn business before I put you out."  
"This isn't your house Natalie, you can't put me out. I'm not going any where unless Cris tells me too."  
"Cris tell her to go. Tell her to go so we can make this work with us." She whimpered pulling at Cris's arm.  
"I've had this conversation with you before Natalie. It's over. I'm not some damn fire hydrant that you can run back and forth between and piss on!" he snapped.  
"You bastard!" Natalie snapped stepping back from him, "How dare you."  
"No! How dare you." Layla offered up stepping in front of Cris, "You throw yourself at my sister's boyfriend for a year and then she dumps him and starts shacking up with you for what reason I don't know." She said rolling her head. "But when she goes missing god forbid he finally comes to his senses and realizes that you! Aren't the one he wants, and never wanted. I would say you were what, a stand in for something better!"

"You Bitch!" Natalie squealed and lunged for her. Layla took a step to the side and watched as Natalie went stumbling after her. She spun around ready to slap Layla when Cris grabbed her hand, "Natalie go. You've worn out your welcome." Cris said gripping her wrist tightly.  
"But Cris…" She whimpered her bottom lip quivering.  
"I'm not the same as I went in Natalie. I don't need you to feel like a real man. Now if you don't mind, I was in the middle of something that I'd like to get back too."  
Natalie looked over Cris's shoulder and to Layla who was glaring at her with a wicked smirk on her face, "You want her…"  
"We were having a nice time until it was rudely interrupted. If you want something, next time call before you come barging into my place." He hissed releasing her and pushing her backwards.

He turned his back and walked to the door, pulling it open he stood in front of it staring at her, "Go Natalie…" Natalie looked at Cris holding back her tears and walked past Layla and out the door, "Don't come crawling back to me when Layla over there decides she wants something better than you."  
"I'm sorry Natalie but I'm nothing like you!" Layla snapped walking closer to the two of them.  
"Whatever…" She mumbled pushing past Cristian and out the door. He closed it shut and turned to stare at Layla, "That was un called for."  
"She attacked me!" Layla said shocked.  
"You still didn't have to go at her like that."  
"I can't believe you're defending her?" Layla said annoyed and walked to grab her coat, scarf and purse.  
"I'm not defending her, where are you going!" He called as she stopped at the door.  
"I'm not going to stay here and listen to you defend that little witch. After everything thing she did to ruin my sister's relationship with John and then still chased after him even though you fought to come back to her. She makes me sick." Layla said glaring at him.  
"Stay…"  
"What?" She asked confused.  
"I want you to stay." Cris walked over and closed the door and took Layla's purse and coat from her and set it down on the island. "We were talking about your childhood. Come tell me more…" he said nodding at her.  
Layla stood at the door watching as Cris sat down on the couch and propped his feet up on the trunk that was his coffee table. He looked over at her and smiled as he drank his water, "You going, or staying?"  
She smiled and took a step forward, "Staying."

John looked at the pinky bunny in his hands gently holding it unlike how he held it the last time, "You still have this." He whispered looking over at her.  
"Of course I do… Why wouldn't I?" Evangeline said shaking her head and raising her eyebrow.  
"I don't know… I mean, it's just…"  
"John don't go there please."  
He set the bunny down and looked up at her and smiled weakly, "You know I remember everything about that night."  
"So do I!" she snapped.  
"That was the first time that I was able to tell you some things openly and honestly."  
"You were drunk." She said dismissively.  
"Not drunk enough to not know what I was saying and doing. I was telling you the truth, all of it."  
"You didn't say anything that night."

John took a step forward and then placed his hands on the arm of the couch, "I tried too."  
"You couldn't."  
"I can now."  
"Yeah I'm sure you can." She said rolling her eyes.  
"I can, what do you want to know."  
Evangeline looked up at him shocked, "What?"  
"What do you want to know? You shared with me last night now I'm going to do the same. So what do you want to know?"  
"Nothing John…." She mumbled pulling at a blanket.

He looked down at her and then took a seat at the end of the couch. John pulled a pillow onto his lap and pulled at the corner of it. "You ever ride your bikes around town when you were little?"  
"What?"  
"Your bike did you ever ride it around town?"  
"Not really, why?"  
"Really?"  
"Yeah, a lot of my friends didn't live in the area so if I wanted to play my mom or dad took me."  
"Oh well where I grew up all the kids lived on the same block you know."  
"Yeah…  
He smiled at her, glad that she was letting him stay. "So my best friends and I would always ride our bikes around the neighborhood.  
"What were you like in a gang or something." She said chuckling.  
John smiled and let go of a soft laugh, "You could say something like that."  
"So why are you telling me this."

He shifted uncomfortably on the couch and blew out a slow deep breath, "I wanted to tell you this back then." He said looking behind him at the bunny on the desk.  
"What stopped you?"  
"You just kept coming at me with all the questions. I hate when people do that." He said honestly. Evangeline cut her eyes away and bit her lower lip, "But I shouldn't have snapped at you back then and I'm sorry I did."  
She nodded her head and John took that as a sign for him to continue, "There is so much here." He said gripping his chest, "So much I want to tell you but I don't know where to start."  
"The beginning." She said looking at him.

"That's a good place to start." He said smiling at her, "Was Layla ever a pain?"  
"She was my little sister of course she was a pain!" Evangeline said laughing.  
"Mike too, but nothing like this girl named Kelly Ryan."  
"Who's that?" She questioned shaking her head.  
"The first person I ever failed." John replied looking up at the ceiling.  
"What?"  
"Like I said I had this group of friends we went everywhere on our bikes."  
"Was Kelly a part of this group?"  
"No but she wanted to be. Always tagging along, chasing after me you know the little girl stuff."  
"Oh…"  
"Yeah, I tried a lot of things to get rid of her. But I mean she was only 7 and I was 9 at the time."  
"Was this before you dad?"  
John nodded and lowered his head, his dark hair falling down over his face, "Yeah…" he swallowed looking up at her. "Just few months before dad."  
"I'm sorry what happened to her?"

"We were all playing down the block from one of my best friend's house. When she came riding up on her bike. It's so weird how you remember the little things. But it's so clear even now I can see her red hair in a high ponytail swishing back and forth as her pink bike with purple streamers came flying down the street. You never would have known she was only seven by the way she acted."  
"Tough?"  
"Very and acted like she knew everything. But at the same time innocent and really vulnerable. She would always look to me to help her out of jams."  
Evangeline sucked in her breath as John talked of Kelly, she was so much like Natalie it wasn't even funny. "So you played her hero."  
"Yeah I guess."  
"Oh…"  
"Yeah. Well that day I was sick of her hanging around me. I just got in a fight with my mom about something what I don't remember and then here she comes and starts talking about some new toy her dad got her. Her dad was some bigwig in town, like the assistant to the deputy Mayor or something like that."  
"What happened John?" Evangeline said softly.

He looked up at her and frowned as he ran a hand over his face, "I ran her away."  
"What do you mean?"  
"I mean I yelled at her and told her to get lost and leave me alone. I was sick and tired of her always around me. I liked it at first you know someone that looked up at me, but she would get in the way of this older girl that I liked and I would always have to go after Kelly to help her out of some stupid jam she got herself into."  
"Sounds like someone else we know." She mumbled.  
"I know… I know that Evangeline." John snapped.  
"Hey!"  
"This is hard enough for me to tell this. No one knows this, I mean no one. Mike, my mom, dad didn't know either."  
"John…"  
"I pushed her away and she died! I killed the girl, I ran her away. All she wanted was for me to be her friend at the least. But no! I was sick of her in my face so she ran." He snapped closing his eyes.  
Evangeline shook her head finally understanding John a little bit more, "How did she die John?" she asked softly.

John opened his eyes and looked over at her. Her hair had fallen across her face and he reached to tuck it behind her ear and then gently caressed her face before pulling his hand back. Evangeline relished in the simple contact and wanted to do the same to him, but wasn't quite sure she of her feelings for him. "I yelled at her, told her that to go away, to get lost. She got on her bike and peddled away while all of my friends and I laughed at her."  
"Go on…"  
"She got hit by a car. We all heard the squealing tires and the glass crunching and her bones breaking from where we were."  
"Oh god!" She said softly covering her mouth.  
"If I just let her stay with us, hang out with us, she wouldn't have gotten hit by that car. I wouldn't have…"  
"What? You wouldn't have what John."  
"I don't know." He said softly looking down at the pillow he held in his hands, "I was so used to being able to help her, to be there for her. The one time she needed me, really needed me to be there for her I wasn't."  
"Oh John…" Evangeline said softly reaching out and touching his hand. He turned his hand over to lightly hold hers. "It was so hard to stand there in the middle of the street and watch her die in front of me."

"You didn't help her?"  
"I didn't know how! I mean I could always before help her, it was my job to help her, to get her out of the trouble but the one time she need me Evangeline, the one time she really needed me I couldn't help her!" He snapped. John pulled his hand from her and stood up from the couch. Evangeline watched as he walked to the door opened it and closed it behind him.

She let a few tears fall down her face as she held her hands close to her chest. John stood on the outside of her door breathing deeply he held back the tears of that day. He could see the image of her lifeless body flash before his eyes as he walked back across the hall to his apartment. Sliding the key in the door he pushed it up and stood staring at the empty apartment, "John!" Evangeline called from her doorway.

Back to Index

Chapter 13: Lost Souls 

John turned in his doorway hearing her calling to him. He considered going back but what would be the point. He couldn't open himself up any further than what he did now.

"John…" Evangeline said coming to the door. She braced herself against the frame with her good hand. "Come back, I need to talk to you…"

He closed the door to his place then moved toward her "Why? Why do you want me to come back?" he asked his voice racked with pain and guilt.

"I…we…you're upset…what you said…"

"So What!" he shouted "So what Van! Why would you care? I mean you gave yourself to me for a year right. You waited and waited offering nothing but support and love for what? For a guy who caused a little girl to run off into the street and get her life snatched away because he was to busy to be concerned about her feelings! The same guy that took a woman to bed while her husband remained locked up away from her. The same man that flaunted it in your face with no remorse." he shouted tears coming down his face, as the pain he's caused her overwhelmed him again. 

Evangeline stood in her doorway unable to speak. She didn't want to pull back the scabs on those wounds again. Each word was like a dagger in her heart. But to see his pain over failing her made her truly believe in his sincerity to make it right.

He stepped into her space, bringing his face to hers and she saw the final threads that held him together all these years unwound. His vibrant blue eyes darkened as his face turned a deep shade of red, as his body began to shake and breakdown from all the burdens he's carried.

She was so frightened for him now, she began to let go of tears of frustration. Her man, this man she loved with ever fiber of her being so broken and tortured, she didn't know what to do.

"John…it's okay…" she said reaching for him.  
"I can't do it Van, I can't rip myself apart any further….I can't relive this over and over just to get you to believe in me! I don't even know if you should after the things I've done to you." 

Evangeline reached for him initiating a kiss that shocked them both. He immediately pulled her into his arms and kissed her back careful of her cast on her arm. Holding and lifting her off her feet he stepped into her place pushing the door wide open and not bothering to close it.

Her eyes fell shut under the seduction within his kiss and she felt a weightless feeling as her body responded in ways she forgot it would from his touch. John so desperate to have her held her with both hands kissing her face and neck "I love you so much Evangeline, you can trust me! I'm so very sorry for hurting you." He said carrying her deeper into her pace toward the sofa. They were loosing control and not aware of anything around them but each other.

Evangeline moaned "John…slow down…" she said panting trying to get her bearings. He didn't hear her, the sound of his own thundering heartbeat pounded in his ears. Walking her back to the couch he pushed her down gently still kissing her. Her eyes rolled into her head as he bit down on her bottom lip softly controlling their kiss.

Enjoying the softness of her body and the taste of her skin he was extra careful of her ankle as he put his weight on her. She wanted to comfort him, and she needed comfort in return, but she knew that this way wasn't the way.

"John…wait…" she said breathlessly smiling trying to get his attention. Sliding his hand up her shirt and grabbing her breast, he squeezed it then forced his tongue back into her mouth as he ground his hips between her parted legs rubbing his stiff manhood on her through their clothes. Evangeline's hips lifted in response and she felt her self grow wet with desire.

Turning her head she broke the kiss as he stuck his tongue in her ear trying to undo the button to her jeans. "No John, stop…" she said trying to resist her burning need for him pushing at his chest with both hands. "Please stop…" she moaned.

"You heard her asshole!" Todd shouted grabbing him roughly and throwing him off her. Evangeline sat up shocked pulling down her shirt to see John fall back against the floor on his back.

He looked up at Todd enraged leaping to his feet, then charging him bent over taking Todd in the gut with his left shoulder forcing him down to the floor.

"Stop it!" Evangeline screamed buttoning her jeans with her free hand, crying in frustration.

John jumped on top of Todd punching him in the face. Todd stunned from the blow threw up his left arm to block the next blow and flipped John off him.

"You were trying to rape her! She didn't want you and you couldn't handle it! I ought to snap you damn neck!" Todd shouted rising swiftly and running over to deliver a powerful kick to his gut.

All the air escaped John lungs as the force of the kick caused him to bend inwardly fighting the urge to throw up. Instead of letting go of his lunch he ignored the pain, grabbing Todd's right foot yanking hard bringing him down on the floor.

"THE BOTH OF YOU STOP IT RIGHT NOW!" Evangeline screamed as the fight got out of hand and they rolled around in front of her attacking each other with their fist. Evangeline swiped her wild hair from her face and tried to get them to stop. "Please! Please stop! Todd, John what the hell is wrong with you!"

John threw Todd off him sending him crashing into her end table breaking it. His rage so strong he went in for the kill but Evangeline stepped in front of him "Stop it dammit!" she shouted in his face pushing at his chest with her free hand. Suddenly loosing her balance she went falling to the floor. 

It was enough to snap them out of it. John went to his knees rushing over to her side "Evangeline you okay…" he said breathing hard tasting blood in his mouth from the cut inside of his mouth.

"Don't touch her!" Todd shouted going to her side, shoving him away.

Evangeline shook her head "Get out!" she said crying uncontrollably.

Todd smiled smugly "You heard her get out!"

Evangeline glared at him "You too! The both of you I want you out now!"  
Todd frowned "What?"  
John reached for her and she backed away dragging her still sore foot. "Don't touch me! Just go…I want you both to go!" she said weakly, crying, frustrated that she couldn't get up from the floor on her own.

"Princess, I'm sorry…I'm so very sorry. When I came to your door it was open and he was on top of you, while you begged him to stop. I couldn't let him hurt you!" Todd said genuinely pained at seeing her cry.

John looked at him as if he had completely given in to insanity. "Are you out of your damn mind? Do you think I would attack her? Of course you do….that's how you do it right? Keep going when the ladies say no"

"Why you robo cop reject…." Todd growled ready to pounce.

"ENOUGH!" she shouted through her tears. Reaching above her she grabbed the door knob on her open front door, pulling herself up. Struggling but refusing their help, she rose and stood on her foot solidly, before opening the door wider "NOW! GO!"

Todd stood and so did John. They glared at each other for a long moment, then Todd rolled his eyes. He walked over to Van. "Remember the promise I made to you? I told you he wouldn't be allowed to hurt you again. You showed me the beauty of that little girl inside of you that won the spelling bee. I see you for who you really are and expect nothing for my devotion to you. I know you don't need protecting, but you told me it felt good to have someone that cared. That someone is me Van."

Evangeline kept her head down "Leave…" she said sadly  
Todd touched her face forcing her to look in his eyes "I care…"

She bit her lip and nodded "He wasn't going to hurt me Todd and I can't have you hurting him. This has to stop. I want you to go until I invite you back okay?"

Todd didn't conceal his hurt. "You don't mean that"

"I do.." she said moving her face from his hand. "Good night"

He leaned into her and kissed her forehead. John winced from the sight. "Good night Princess." He looked back at the destroyed end table. "I'll replace that" he then looked at John and winked "You and I will finish what we started Batman."

"Looking forward to it" John said glaring back at him with his hair in his face. Todd smirked at John then walked out of the open door. Evangeline avoided John's eyes. "Its late, go home…"  
"What happened earlier…"  
"Just go John"

He walked over to her "Evangeline I love you, I need you back. It would take two lifetimes to make up for all the pain I've caused you. I'd gladly die and come back to do it all over if I could have you. But the truth is life is too short. Everyone I've loved has died before I was able to express my feelings to them. Please….don 't keep pushing me away." 

Evangeline looked in his eyes "You move to fast and you leave me behind John. It's not that I don't think that you love me. I just can't believe until you truly love yourself that you can give me what I need."

"Then help me baby….show me."   
"I can't" she said shaking her head "I can't do that again, you don't respond well to that. This is your journey, you have to take it alone John."  
He touched her face lovingly "And when I've completed my journey and come to you as a hole man, will you be here?"

She stared at him sadly "Good night John"  
He leaned in to her face and kissed her lips softly, putting his forehead to hers "Things have been complicated, painful, and torturous for us. Mostly that's my fault, I know that now and I'll never hurt you like that again. Believe in me…."

She said nothing but his blue eyes conveyed a sincerity she hadn't seen in so very long. John let her face go and walked out. The door closed in his face and he sighed. When will she trust herself with him again? Will she ever?

Looking at the door, he heard a noise to his left. Turning he saw a woman with black hair and dark shades on, with a scarf around her head. She nodded and headed out of the side exit door. John frowned at her finding it odd she would use the emergency exit on the 14th floor as oppose to the elevator.

Hearing the elevator ding he looked over and saw an older woman with her cat step off walking slowly up the hall. Shaking off his suspicion he headed to his condo going inside. He needed some ice for his jaw.

"I really should be going Christian" Layla said rising from the sofa.  
"So soon?" he asked disappointed.  
Putting on her jacket she looked at him amused. She had a wonderful time just sitting and talking about her life with him, learning about his. He was a remarkable man. "You have to be kidding right; I've been here over four hours. I have two jobs you know"

Christian touched her hand, pulling her closer. She moved over toward him and looked down at him smiling shyly. "You aren't ready for this Chris.."  
"How do you know what I'm ready for…"  
She swallowed "Then I'm not ready…" she said weakly  
"Ready for what?"

"Ready to be your rebound girl" she said pulling her hand free and going for her scarf. Christian stood up approaching her. She kept her back to him fishing for her keys nervously in her purse. Feeling him pressing into her she closed her eyes "Chris don't…"

He moved her hair from her shoulder "I'm not going to lie to you, I've loved Natalie for so long so hard, I barely remember who I am anymore. I was so lost in the man I thought she wanted, I forgot to be the man that I needed myself to be. But you Layla, so full of life and fire, you make me want to know myself again. You make me want more for myself." He said kissing the inside of her neck and sliding his arm around her wais pulling her close.

Layla turned around in his arms dropping her purse and placing her hands in his curly hair bringing her mouth to his. Christian kissed her tenderly and then more feverishly as his passion for her increased with the feel of her. Layla lowered her eyes and said a silent prayer that the choice she was making wouldn't come back to hurt her in the long run.

Margaret leaned back on the emergency exit door, waiting a solid thirty minutes before opening it. She had to contain the rage that boiled inside of her. Taking the Emergency stairs earlier she came into the hallway in time to hear screaming and shouting from Evangeline's.

She found out what floor and apartment she was on easily through the internet before she left Paige's. Silently creeping down the hall she stopped just outside Evangeline's door to listen to the battle in side.

Todd and that cop spared over the pretty attorney to her disgust. Hearing Todd fighting and struggling for the love of someone less worthy enraged her. Paige's words came back to haunt her. It was all true, her Todd had feelings for another woman. "As if that bitch Blair isn't enough….." she hissed clenching her fist tightly.

"Todd, have you been that desperate without me?" she asked her chest burning with jealousy, her eyes wide with the madness that dwelled in her skull.

"Well someone needs to let Ms. Evangeline Williamson esq know what her place is!" she grunted stepping into the hall. She walked over to Evangeline's door and knocked on it, keeping her head bowed.

"I'm okay really Nora…"  
Nora sat up on the couch and accepted the medicine from the nurse. She was no longer in the wheel chair but she did tire easily. "I know physically your fine but my god Van, emotionally you must be exhausted."

"He's trying…"  
"That's a good thing."  
"Part of me wishes he wouldn't. I think too much time has past. We're both different now"  
"Different is good, because you could never have anything they way that you were. He was too selfish and you were too accepting. This time both of you have grown. You won't loose yourself sweetie, you have to believe that.

"I believe that time is still needed, then maybe"  
Nora sighed smiling. "Well maybe sounds a helluva lot better than your previous 'hell no!' " she said laughing

Evangeline laughed too "I'm so glad you're my friend and I have you back"  
"Me too…take care"  
"I will, love you bye."

Evangeline turned off the phone, sitting on the window seal to her large picture window facing the front of the condo watching the cars go by in the night. Several times she fought the urge to go to him and tell him her feelings and fears. She just couldn't bring herself to do it. Whenever she was near him she lost herself.

Nora said she could trust her feelings again. Her mind said differently and she didn't know what to believe. Hearing a knock at the door she smiled slightly. He just couldn't stay away. Rising to her feet she limped over to the door dropping the phone to her sofa before unlocking and opening it. She didn't bother to ask who it was, thinking he was back with his lame cup of sugar excuse. Evangeline saw a woman with dark hair covered by a Burberry scarf and large oval shades. "Can I help you?" 

Margaret stepped in forcing her back and slammed the door. Evangeline gasped stumbling back trying to remain standing on her good foot. "Oh God! Margaret?" she screamed loudly hoping that John could hear her across the hall.

"Shut your damn mouth! Scream again and I'll shut it for you!" Margaret hissed pulling off her scarf and removing her shades. She looked around the place and then back at Evangeline "Are we alone?"

"NO!" Evangeline said bluffing.  
Margaret smiled evilly and tilted her head "Liar!"  
"What do you want Margaret?"  
"I want to get some things straight with you!" she said advancing on her. Evangeline refused to cower to the insane woman and stood her ground. "Get out of my house!"

Margaret laughed "I guess I'm not making my self clear. Todd is mine, he has always been mine, he will always remain mine. We have a child together and we plan to spend our lives raising TJ in a loving secure family!" she screeched moving into Evangeline face. Evangeline now with her back to the wall moved to the right to gain a better advantage over her nemesis.

Margaret reached and grabbed her by her good arm shaking her "Did you sleep with him! Did you sleep with my Toddy!" she snapped.

Evangeline snatched her arm loose and slapped Margaret, who in turn delivered a back hand slap sending her to the ground tripping over her bad ankle. Evangeline winced at the pain and looked up at Margaret towering over her.

"Answer me bitch! Did you sleep with him!" she said pulling a gun from her purse. Evangeline gasped "Oh my god you are crazy!"

"And you're dead!" Margaret said aiming the gun at her.  
The door to Evangeline apartment burst open with John leveling his gun at her "Drop it Margaret!" he shouted at her.

Margaret immediately reached down and forced Evangeline to her feet. Putting the gun to her head she used Evangeline as a shield. "I don't think so cop, you drop it and do it now!"

John looked into Evangeline eyes and his hands holding the gun firmly began to shake. He thought about Kelly, his dad and Caitlyn. If he lost one more person he loved to violence it would be the death of him. Breathing through his nose his eyes turned into desperately angry blue slits. "Fine….just let her go"

"Drop the damn gun and kick it over to me!" Margaret hissed  
"John don't she's crazy!" Evangeline said afraid she'd shoot him or worse. She was once again facing death and the fear of the moment had her legs feeling as if they would go weak.

John smiled weakly at her "I can't let you be hurt, I can't loose you"

Margaret watched the exchange between the two of them. "Wow this is sweet….so he's the one you want hunh? Why are you teasing my Toddy then? Are you a skankmonkey like Blair?" Margaret asked snatching on her hair. 

"I'm not!" Evangeline said wincing. "Todd's my client and friend, nothing more!"  
Margaret thought it over. She looked back at John "Drop the gun!" she shouted again releasing the safety on the gun she had pressed against Evangeline's temple.

John lowered the gun to the floor and then kicked it over to Margaret's foot. Margaret shoved Evangeline to the couch and picked up the gun. She smiled at them both triumphantly as Evangeline sat up straight wincing from the way she strained the muscle in her ankle when Margaret pushed her down.

"Now move away from the door!" Margaret said instructing John to step away. He nodded keeping his hands up. A great sense of relief came over him because the guns were pointed at him and not Evangeline. 

Margaret kept the guns in both hands trained on John as she moved her way to the front door. She looked over at Evangeline "Tell Todd, that I will be contacting him soon with instructions on how and where to meet me and TJ. If I hear about this visit on the news I'll be forced you to teach you some lessons that I had to show Blair, and I won't be as generous as I was then."

John shook his head "You have to know that you can't get away with this. You killed a man, woman and baby among other things. Plus you're a mother think about your child!"

Margaret's eyes grew wide "You jerk I didn't kill that woman and baby! Spencer got bodies from the morgue stupid cop! As for getting away with it, I'd say I'm smarter than you since I got your gun asshole!" she said grinning manically.

"Besides I do all of this for TJ! He means the world to me and his daddy. That's why I will get away with this. It's our destiny" she said backing out. "Don't try to follow me because I will shoot, and shoot to kill!"

John watched her disappear into the hall. Turning he rushed to the door to follow "John no! Please don't, she's crazy…"

He stopped and looked back at Evangeline "I have to go after her, you'll be okay wait here" he said sweetly

"NO! NO!" she screamed shaking her head wildly and John saw the stress from the experience was causing her to breakdown. Going to her he pulled her sobbing into his arms. "Okay, okay I won't go…." He said rocking her.

She clung to him "I don't want to die!"   
"You won't die, I'm so sorry baby. I'm so sorry you had to go through this all over again"

Several minutes passed as he calmed her. "I have to at least call it in, okay?"  
Evangeline nodded letting him go. John rose and went to the phone in the kitchen looking back over his shoulder at the fear still in her eyes. .

"Bo, it's John Margaret was here at Evangeline's" he said closing the front door and then going back into the kitchen with the long phone cord.

"What? Is she okay?"

"Yeah but she has my gun, and she got away"

"What is she driving, where did she go?"

John went to the window of the place and saw nothing on the street "I couldn't follow her, I'm sorry I don't know"

"I'll send some officers over there right away!" Bo said alarmed.

John looked over at Evangeline who had her face in her hand with her head bowed. "Bo do me a favor, let me take care of her. We will come in, in the morning to give you a statement. She's been through a lot"

"Sure John, whatever you say. I'm sending a unit over there to keep an eye on her place, he won't disturb her. Have you seen Manning?"

John sucked his teeth leaning against the counter. "Yeah, he was here earlier. I think he's staying at the Palace not the Penthouse."

"Fine, I get some units to both places. She hasn't gone far."  
"I agree. Thanks"  
"No problem, bring her in the morning."  
"Sure thing"

John hung up, blowing out a frustrated breath he ran his hand through his hair. Evangeline was sitting back on the couch now with her head tilted back and eyes closed. Going to the drawer next to the sink he got out a ziploc bag. Opening the freezer he scooped up ice cubes to fill the bag with.

John went to Evangeline and smiling softly "Hey you okay?"  
She looked up at him "Never ends does it?" she asked trying to stop shivering, the fear of that gun pressed to her head made her life once again flash before her eyes. John sat on the coffee table in front of her lifting her bandaged foot. "It does baby, this visit wasn't your fault."

"How did you know she was here?"  
"I didn't, I came back to beg to some more….heard you two arguing outside of the door." He said looking up at her sheepishly massaging her ankle.

Evangeline smiled "Glad you did"

"Does it hurt?"  
"Only when I smile" she said softly chuckling  
He smiled at hearing her humor return, he didn't want her tortured any further. Rolling up her jean pant leg he applied the ice to the outside of her bandaged foot. She stared at him "Thank you for saving my life"

John looked directly into her eyes "Care to tell me about this spelling bee?"  
She frowned "What?"  
"After Todd saved your life he made a comment that stuck with me. A comment he repeated here earlier today. I knew that you two were close because of the near death experience and I figured that remark was related to it. For a long time it made no sense, now it does. Especially after you told me of your father's demands for excellence, so tell me about the spelling bee…"

Evangeline stared at him. "Why? We almost died tonight John."

Lowering his voice he looked at her with love. "I know that sweetie, tonight you went through another horrific event and I don't want you to dwell on it. I want you to open up to me and let me back in so I can help you through your fears. Simply because I love you."

Evangeline told him of what her childhood was like and how great her accomplishments made her feel when she saw them through her daddy's eyes. The difference being that he is no longer at her side to keep count and being the perfectionist that excels no longer satisfies her.

John massaged her ankle with one hand keeping the ice on it with the other. The pain began to subside and she relaxed under his touch. John told her of the good memories with his dad, fishing and going to Yankee Stadium. Soon the horror of Margaret's visit subsided and she felt safe in his company.

Rising he lowered her foot and went to the door and locked it. Evangeline watched him confused. "What are you doing John?"

"I'm putting you to bed." He said taking the icepak to the sink.

Evangeline sat up staring at him in disbelief. "That's not necessary…"

"I think it is…I love you and you love me, finally that feels right" he said going to the sofa and scooping her up in his arms. "I won't spend another day without you in my arms."

She looked into his face as he lifted her effortlessly from the sofa. Slipping her arms around his neck she soften, and allowed him to carry her to her bedroom. He was right, and she wouldn't fight it any longer.

Christian pushed Layla's jacket from her shoulder and allowed his kisses to travel to her neck. "Chris, I don't think we should…"

"Stop thinking….stop talking" He moaned reaching between them and undoing the buttons to her shirt. Layla tilted her head back completely swept away from his touch. Bringing her face back to his she kissed him again passionately, feeling her feet leave the ground as he lifted her. She wrapped her legs around him holding on tightly.

As he carried her through the loft they devoured each other. He wanted to be free of his pain over lost love and she wanted to finally have a love of her own. Lowering her to the bed he stopped kissing her to stare down into her face "This isn't about Natalie or anything else. This right here is about you, the remarkable vibrant woman you are…"

Layla looked up into his brown eyes smiling "I don't want to get hurt…"  
"I'll never let that happen…" he said seductively.

Running her fingers through his hair she smiled "You haven't been with a woman in a long time, have you?"

He chuckled "Is that a problem?"  
She giggled "I hope not…"  
Looking down at her, her blouse open revealing her lacy black bra and perfectly shaped breasts he blew out a deep lustful sigh "You are so beautiful I want you so bad…."  
She pulled his face back up to hers "Then indulge yourself…." She whispered taking his tongue back into her mouth.

That was the approval he sought and with permission granted he acted on what he'd suppressed since she arrived at his door and she gave into it willingly.

Back to Index

Chapter 14: Lost Souls 

John kicked open Evangeline's bedroom door as they continued to gaze at one another. He moved slowly into her room careful of her foot and wrist. Evangeline ran her good hand through his hair and leaned her forehead against his, "I've missed this." She said softly as he lowered her down into the bed.  
"Not as much as I've missed you." John whispered releasing his arms from around her body.

Evangeline sat up in the bed tucking her hair behind her ears as John moved across the room to her dresser, "Lavender or light blue?" he questioned pulling at her bottom drawer.  
Evangeline smiled as she shifted on the bed, he still knew where everything was. "Blue." She said grinning. John nodded and pulled out her light blue silk pajamas and handed them to her. Setting them on the edge of the bed she shifted and lifted her arms above her head, "You mind, it's still a little sore." She said looking up at John.  
"I don't think I should."  
"I want you to."  
John moved to stand between her legs and ran his fingers along the edge of her shirt bringing it up over her stomach. He sucked in a breath as his fingers grazed her stomach and inched the shirt over her round full breasts. John adverted his eyes looking down at the ground, still uncomfortable in what she was allowing him to do. Evangeline smirked as she watched his gaze move down to the floor. John pulled the shirt off over her head and threw it to the bed next to her.

Taking a step back he turned completely around as Evangeline slipped off her bra and put on the silk tank top to her pajama set. She unbuttoned her jeans watching as John fought the urge to turn to her and take her right then and there. "You mind?" she questioned trying to get John's attention.  
"Never…" he mumbled turning back around to look at her.  
Her hair scooped around the left side of her face fell gently across her collar bone and down over the top of her pajamas. The tops of her pants flared open revealing the soft black lace he was sure matched her bra. He knelt down in front of her as Evangeline raised up and slid her jeans off her hips and down her thighs. He placed her sore ankle on his shoulder as he rolled down her jeans and slipped them off. He did the same thing with the other leg and then stood taking a step back.

She smiled as she slipped her pants on and then turned into the bed. She threw the covers back on his side of the bed and nodded at it, "I don't think I should."  
"Didn't you just tell me that you aren't going to spend another day without me in your arms. Today is that day John, get in…." she said patting the bed next to her.  
John grinned that boyish smile and pulled his shirt over his head as he kicked off his shoes and socks. He pulled down his pants slowly watching her watching him and then walked around the bed to join her. Sliding into the crisp cool sheets he felt at home, "Just hold me tonight please." Evangeline whispered rolling over to wrap her arms around John's body.

John let his eyes close as his heart began to race from feeling her arms and legs drape over his body. He never thought after she left him that he would every have this feeling again. Opening his eyes slowly he stared at the ceiling of her room, one he would stare at many times when they were together and he couldn't sleep. A huge weight had finally been lifted off his shoulders when he told her about Kelly and how that deeply affected him. All that was left was to find his father's killer and to heal with her.

Evangeline tightened her grip on John as she kissed the underside of his chin and felt his hand run up and down her back and then through her hair, "This…. This is right where I belong." John said looking down at her.  
"You better believe it McBain." Evangeline said with a light laugh.  
The sweet sounds of her laughter filled his ears and his heart slowed down to a restful state. He could hear Evangeline's breath slow and her light snore started to fill the air as she drifted off to sleep in his arms. John continued to play in her hair wondering how in the world he got back to this point, of being in her arms and having her love. He had done everything to drive her away and fall into the darkness, but as soon as she went missing he knew that it was the light where he belonged. The light that was only present when she freely and openly gave herself to him, the light where he freely and openly gave himself to her.

Settling into a restful sleep one he hadn't had since she left him John felt calmed by the presence she brought, the soft sounds of the street noise filled the room as his eyes fluttered close.

Layla let her head tilt back as Cris pressed his body deep into hers. It had been a long while for the both of them, she clawed at his back trying to free him of his shirt. Cris sat up and smiled down at her as he pulled his shirt off, "Let me help you with that." He said as a smirk crossed his lips and he threw it to the side.

She sat up on her elbows running her finger tips across his rippled chest and defined abs. Cris grabbed her hand and brought it slowly up his chest circling his nipples before sliding her fingers into his mouth. He sucked on them seductively as he watched for reaction.

Layla swallowed hard and let her mouth slowly open and her tongue moved over her lower lip as she watched Cris's eyes gaze into hers and the feeling of his tongue circled her fingers. He pulled her fingers free and pushed her back onto the bed. Layla laughed as Cris moved down her and unbuttoned her pants and pulled them free. He positioned himself over her and parted her legs with his free hand and moved slowly down her body kissing and running his tongue over her navel. Layla gasped and threw her head back against the pillows as Cris moved to kiss her inner thighs.

Pushing her silk panties aside Cris licked his lips and slowly dove into her center. Layla tried to move back from him as Cris grabbed her hips and pulled her back. She squirmed under him as he stuck his tongue deeper into her, taking in all of her. She moaned and groaned his name as he gently sucked on her clitoris. Layla felt her impending orgasm and let it go shocking both herself and Cristian. She panted heavily as he climbed up and pushed her knees apart.

Cris climbed back up and ran his hands over her breasts freeing them of her bra. Her breasts bounced into his view and Cris said a silent prayer thanking his lucky stars that he had a real woman in his bed. Lowering his face he kissed the inside of her breasts before giving each pointy nipple the attention it so sought. He felt Layla raise her hips up pushed her panties off and then moved to pull at Cris's boxers. His throbbing member released from the constraint of his boxers and he grabbed Layla's butt raising her up to dive deep into her center. He gasped at the overwhelming way they fit together.

The thrusts slow and deliberate sent Layla closer to the edge with no sign of being released. Cris moved slowly against her hips circling his in a slow motion. He pulled at Layla's leg raising it high in the air as he thrusted into her further. Her flexibility shocked him as her leg stayed high in the air and he was able to command her body in ways he never knew were possible.

Her moans grew louder with each thrust as she wrapped her leg around Cris's waist pushing him deeper into her. He fell on to her chest grunting into her ear, how good she felt, and how he knew this was right, how right it felt to be in her arms. Layla tilted her head back and squeezed her walls around his member bringing them both to climax. He shot into her with such force that the bed hit the back wall in a loud thud. Releasing her leg from around his waist Layla let out a deep satisfied moan and rubbed his back.

Cris rolled over to the side, his hair in his face, his breath heavy and labored he stared at the ceiling and then looked over to Layla who a soft smile on her lips. He leaned over and kissed her lips softly and slid his tongue into her mouth, wanting to taste her again. Her hand went into his hair pulling his face closer to hers as she indulged in the feeling of his tongue in her mouth, his soft hands on her hot flesh. Pulling back Cris stared down at her, "This isn't just a one time rebound thing you know that right."  
Layla ran her fingers through Cris's hair and down his face and shoulder, "I know…" she said softly before kissing him again.

Later that night

"NO!" Evangeline screamed as she shot up out of the bed. Looking to her left she didn't see John and then looked out into her room. Her eyes adjusted to the darkness in the room and saw John walking over to her, "What!" he said nervously sitting down next to her.  
"I had a nightmare, and I almost lost you." she said throwing her arms around her neck.  
"I'm here, I'm right here." he said stroking her back and hair.

Eva pulled back and kissed him softly, "What were you doing all the way over there?"  
John looked over his shoulder and then back at her, "I don't know…" he mumbled.  
"I thought you would hold me all night?"  
"I tired, something just didn't feel right?"  
"Oh…" Evangeline lowered her head and pulled her feet to her chest.  
"It's not you…" he said softly as he caressed her face with the back of his hand, "It's me, I guess I just…"

Evangeline looked up at him her eyes glistening with tears, "Are you sure you want this."  
"What's this?"  
"You and I, us…"  
John smiled and kissed her lips lightly, "There is one thing I know for certain in my life."  
"What's that?"  
"That I love you, and I want you. I just don't know if you feel as strong as I do."  
Evangeline brushed her nose against his and smiled, "I need you John, more than you realize. It may not be the same as…"

John put his finger to her lips to silence her, "She's not in our lives anymore. If she can't respect how I feel about you then I have no use for her."  
"But you love her."  
"No, I care about her. Her life was a mess because of me, and my life was a mess because of me. But that is all going to change."  
"How?"  
"I have what I've longed for, for so very long."  
"What's that." Evangeline questioned as she ran her fingers through his hair.  
"You're love… I finally can learn to love myself because I have you."  
"I'm always going to be here John."

He pulled back and stared at her, "You said that last time, and you still left me."  
"There's a difference now…"  
"What's that?" he questioned tilting his head to the side as his eyes roamed from her head over her eyes and lips down to the swell of her breasts and back up.  
"You love me…" she said grinning.  
"I do, I do love you."  
"Show me…" Evangeline said softly raising her arms in the air.  
"What?"  
"I need you to show me John. It's been so long for the both of us, show me you love me. Let's heal together…" She said scooting back on the bed. "Make love to me John."

John stood from the bed and leaned over pulling up the night shirt and laying it on the bed. Evangeline pushed the covers from around her body and laid back on the bed. She watched as John moved around and crawled back into bed with her. He laid next to her and Evangeline turned to gaze upon him, John ran his hands down her face and over her shoulder with the tips of his fingers before cupping her breasts, "Are you sure about this?" he said tenderly as he rested his forehead against hers.  
"Make love to me John, show me you love me…"  
"You and only you." He said kissing her lips softly. Evangeline melted against his body as his arm pulled her close and his tongue found it's way into her soft mouth. His eyes squeezed shut as he relished in the way her nipples brushed against his chest. He could feel his member start to throb as he moved slowly against her. Evangeline smiled through the kiss as his hand traveled down her bare back and into her pants. 

Holding her tighter as John pressed himself deeper into Evangeline pushed John onto his back and broke the kiss. She laid against his chest kissing him slowly down his neck. Her hair grazed across his body sending shock waves through his flesh as her kisses moved down his chest. Pushing up on his elbows Evangeline trailed kisses down his chest and onto his stomach. She pulled at his boxer shorts pushing them down as she crawled back up to his level.

John watched closely as she positioned herself on top of him and stroked his member room behind. His hands ran slowly over her hips and thighs still in shock that she was here and this was real, "This is real right?" John asked running his hands over her breasts as he massaged them slowly. Evangeline nodded as she grabbed the base of his member and slid down onto it. She arched her back placing her hands on his lower legs as she rocked back and forth on his lap

He let his hands move wherever they desired as she continued to move slowly over his lap remembering what it was like to love him, to make love to him once more. "Evangeline…." John moaned looking up at her.  
She smiled and moved her head to look at him, "mmmm…" She groaned as her motions picked up pace. Looking down at John she stopped suddenly as she caught his eyes staring intently back at her. The look was one she had never seen before and she held his powerful gaze. He gripped her hips and moved her back and forth as he continued to hold her gaze.

John held her tightly as Evangeline started her movements again rocking back and forth slowly and seductively still holding John's intense gaze. She mouthed she loved him as her mouth fell open from the pleasure rippling through her body. John closed his eyes and rose up and wrapped his arms around her body pushing himself deeper into her. He missed the feeling of being at home in her body, he never felt more loved and desired than in this moment. Pulling back some Evangeline rested her forehead against his and her mouth against his as they breathed in and out together in unison.

John slowed the motions of their love making as he rocked and bounced her on his lap trying to become a part of her, body, mind and soul. The grunts John emitted as he made love to the only woman that filled the whole in his heart after Caitlyn, filled the air. Evangeline turned her head to the side as John buried his head in her neck and fell back against the bed holding her tightly to his chest. She moved her hips and body faster over him, letting her walls vibrated with such intensity she was overwhelmed that she still hadn't orgasmed yet.

John rolled them over careful of her wrist and ankle and rose up to stare down into her eyes. Throwing his head back John grabbed her knee and pushed it against her chest as he pumped in and out of her, enjoying the warmth and love that she provided. Her back arched and John slid his arm underneath her as Evangeline wrapped her legs around his waist digging her heels into his lower back, "Oh God…" She cried out as John pushed deeper into her. "John…oh…god… Please….don't… stop…." She moaned as he thrusted back and forth into her.

John lowered his face to capture Evangeline's lips in a searing kiss and to silence her moans, and cries of ecstasy. Evangeline clawed at his back digging her nails into John's back as her walls shook and quaked around his member. Kissing him harder as he felt her stomach tighten from the orgasm she finally released as John released her. He watched her body quake under the force of her orgasm and released as well. Letting go of all the passion, desire, and love he had pent up over the past months John collapsed onto her chest panting heavily as he kissed her neck over and over again.

He lavished in the feeling of still being inside of her as Evangeline stroked his back and ran her fingers through his hair. John snuggled against her ear as he moved slowly from on top of her. He rested his arm across her bare chest as Evangeline turned her head to face his. John looked at her with tired eyes, "I love you, you know that right." She said softly letting her fingers travel the outline of his face.  
"Yes, and I love you and only you…" he said kissing her finger tips as they grazed across his lips. Evangeline let her eyes flutter close at the feeling his lips on her finger tips. She rested her forehead against his as her breathing slowed. He held her close running his fingers up and down her hips her flesh still sticky with the sweat of their love making. "I'm going to prove to you, that I love you and only you…. I'll do whatever it takes to make you believe in me, in us again. I need that, I need you."

"I need you too John, I will always need you." Evangeline whispered kissing his lips. John's soft smile spread against his lips and Evangeline felt it too as her lips spread into a smile. "Good..." he said as let his lips brush against her neck and then drifted off to sleep wrapped in the security of her arms, the loving embrace that would always let him truly sleep.

"Good morning…" Cris said sitting on the edge of the bed holding a cup of coffee under Layla's nose. She stretched and looked up at him as she ran her hands through her tangled hair, "Morning." She said shyly pulling up the sheets to cover her naked body.  
"It's not like I haven't seen it." Cris said with a smirk as he stood up and got back into bed next to her.  
"It's just…." She stuttered and sipped the coffee, "Wow this is good."  
"It's what happens from working in a diner so long."  
"Thanks." She mumbled lowering her head and setting the coffee down next to the bed. "I should get going." Layla reached for her bra and slipped it on as Cris watched her from behind.

He moved in letting his lips graze across her back and neck, "I meant what I said last night." He whispered against her ear before sucking slowly on the lobe.  
Layla moved away from Cris as she slipped her panties on and searched for her shirt and pants, "Where are you going." Cris said with a raised eyebrow.  
"I have to get to work."  
"At least have breakfast with me."  
"You don't have to do that." Layla said looking over her shoulder as she slipped her pants on.  
"It's not a choice, sorry." Cris hoped out of the bed and grabbed some clothes. "The diner sound good?"  
"Umm…. Okay?" Layla said softly as she buttoned her shirt back up.  
"Great, give me a few, gotta brush my teeth."  
"Okay."

Evangeline felt his kisses travel around her neck and collar bone as her eyes opened to the light of a new day. She played in John's hair and he looked up and winked at her, "Morning beautiful." He said his eyes sparkling with something new in them.  
"Morning handsome." She spoke kissing his lips. "Hey you cheated…"  
"What?"  
"You're breath… it's minty fresh." She said laughing.  
"I had to go to my apartment and get something."  
"What's that?"  
John moved back and pulled Evangeline up from the bed. He moved behind her and rested his chin on her shoulder, "Close your eyes." He said softly.  
"Why?"  
"For me…"  
Evangeline closed her eyes and John leaned forward to make sure they were closed, "Good." He pulled the pearls from behind his back and fingered them in his hands. "You told me once to give these to the person I loved, and I told them I gave them to you."  
"John…" she said as she felt his hands move her hair from around her neck.  
"Shhh….In my own way I was telling you that I loved you, I was trying so hard even then to say the words. Now they come so easily it's because I know that in my heart of hearts that I will always love you and I feel whole now that I can say that."

Evangeline felt her eyes well with tears as they finally trickled down her face as she felt the cool gems fall upon her neck. John clasped the necklace and kissed her back lightly where they rested. Evangeline raised her fingers and turned to look at John, "Right where they belong." He said letting his fingers graze against her neck and collar bone.  
Speechless Evangeline nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck kissing his shoulder over and over again.

Caressing the back of her hair John held her close and smiled as he felt her tears drop on to his shoulder, "Happy tears right?"  
"You better believe it McBain."  
"Good… I'm starved why don't we go to the diner before I take you into the station to give your statement."  
"You'll be there with me right?"  
"Every step of the way." He said kissing her nose.  
Evangeline giggled and hoped up out of the bed and hobbled to the shower. Winking at John she ducked into the bathroom and stared the water. John ran his fingers through his hair laughing softly as he heard the soft melodious sound of her voice float through her bedroom. He missed this, all of it.

John held onto Evangeline's hand tightly as they stepped into the diner. He slipped off her coat and hung it up as Evangeline stopped in the middle of the diner staring. John turned and almost ran into Evangeline as his gaze found what she was staring at, "Is that your sister?"  
"With Cristian." Evangeline said stunned. She looked back at John and they both strolled over to the table. Crossing her arms over her chest she looked down at her baby sister holding hands with Cristian Vega and leaning in so close they could kiss. Evangeline let out a cough when Layla and Cris didn't look up to see them. Layla pulled her hand back and placed it on her lap, "Are those the same clothes you had on yesterday, and aren't you supposed to be at work?" She said narrowing her eyes onto her sister.

John laughed softly and rocked back and forth on his heels as he slid his hand around Evangeline's waist, "Be nice." He said laughing and whispering in her ear.  
"Yeah be nice! Listen to the man!" Layla said glaring at her sister.  
"Care to explain what's going on here." Evangeline questioned pointing between her sister and new found friend.  
"I don't have to explain anything to you!" Layla snapped shaking her head.

Back to Index


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 15: Lost Souls 

Todd rolled over to buzzing sound of his alarm clock, swatting his hand he knocked the top of it turning it off. After leaving Evangeline's he spent the rest of the evening at the bar drowning his sorrows. He didn't know what he was doing anymore. His life had spiraled once again out of control and the ironic thing was this time he hadn't done the horrible things that set the events in motion.

In the past his sins manifested themselves in horrific ways and he swallowed the bitter pill of contrition. Now he wanted to be different. He'd changed and it was all because of her. Opening his eyes he looked up at the ceiling and remembered the feel of Evangeline shivering in his arms. He'd loved and hurt many women in his life, but his friendship with her was different. It was free of any stains from his nefarious deeds in the past. It was pure.

Sighing his thought drifted to Blair. They were cut from the same cloth. She was apart of him no matter how bad things got between them, or how deeply they hurt each other. She betrayed him but he's betrayed her in numerous ways in the past. Neither one could get a free pass on what's happened between them. He could no longer blame her for being who she is, and he would do what was necessary to put his life together. His life could never be Evangeline; although he's fallen in love with her, she was too special for that.

Reaching over he picked up the phone and dialed Blair.

"Hello…"  
"Blair it's me"  
"Todd?"  
"Were you sleeping?"  
"Umm…no…is everything okay?"  
"That's why I called. We need to talk"   
"Okay…." She said biting down on her bottom lip.  
"I'll come to you this evening when the kids are there so I can see them."  
"Okay Todd.."

He hung up before saying more. He didn't know if they could be the lovers, friends or the soul mates they were once before. He just knew that for Starr and Jack he'd do anything, which included trying to reach past the pain and bitterness he shared with their mother.

Rising from the bed he hung up the phone and thought of Evangeline. If he called her now and heard John in the background it would hurt deeply. Sighing he decided against it. He wouldn't allow himself to insert himself in her life and poison her with his madness. A woman like her deserved better. He loved her too much for that. He would however show her what kind of man John McBain was, because he was even less than deserving.

The room had the morning chill and he shivered reaching for his robe. He forgot to turn on the heat in the suite last night when he stumbled in drunk. Tightening the robe he headed out the front into the living room area. He instinctively glanced to the suite door to see a white envelope lying at the foot of it. Todd stood still for several minutes looking at the envelope confused. Finally he walked over to it and picked it up. On the front stenciled in black ink was his name.

Opening the envelope he pulled out the folded stationary to read.

_  
Todd,_

My beloved, you must know how happy I am that you are alive and well. Both me and your child prayed that you got through the horrors of being wrongly accused then trapped in that plane. I am so sorry for my role in that, but as you know it could not be helped.

Now that you are home its time to move into the future my love. I'm sure by now you know that I visited Evangeline last night and put her on notice. I will not have her coming between us. She took advantage of your need for comfort, and I'm so sorry that I wasn't there when you needed me. That won't happen again I promise. It is time to be the family we were destined to be.

I've enclosed the details of where and when to meet me. TJ is with someone I trust don't worry. Tonight we start anew, I plan to be the mother and wife you need.

I'm trusting you to follow these instructions to the letter. I'm watching you and if you deviate in anyway. I will make all those that you claim to care about pay, while you watch.

All my love

Margaret 

Todd pulled loose the other paper with details on where to meet at the docks near the Lantana Bay and his hand began to shake with fury. "Noooo" he moaned at the nightmare reappearing. The letter said she'd targeted Evangeline. His heart racing, he dropped the paper and ran to his room to get changed. He had to find out if she was okay.

"Okay what's your problem!" Layla hissed snatching away from her sister.

Evangeline pushed her back into the booth like area where the restrooms were in the diner. She looked Layla up and down and saw it on her face. They'd been intimate.

"Please Lay, please tell me you didn't sleep with him"

"Back off Van, I'm a grown woman!" 

Evangeline threw her hand up on the wall blocking her sister in. "That's acting like a little girl. The man is head over heels in love with his wife…."

"Ex-wife!"

"Doesn't matter, do you really want to go through what I went through with John?" Van asked trying to reach her.

Layla folded her looking her sister in her eyes hurt. She couldn't believe she was turning something magical into something ugly. "Christian is no longer with Natalie and we're just friends. I resent like hell what you're implying, as if he couldn't possibly be interested in me other than some quick lay."

Evangeline sighed "I want to protect you…"

"I don't need your protection!" Layla snapped pushing her out of the way.

John looked up to see Layla storming in their direction. Christian turned his head to see her eyes watered with tears and frowned. "What's going on?" he asked when she approached.

"Can you take me back to my car, please?" Layla asked angrily.

Christian rose from the booth retrieving Layla's coat from the side of him. "Are you okay?" he asked helping her into it. Looking over at Evangeline who was now at the table, running her hand through her hair nervously, he frowned. Apparently Evangeline saw something distressing about the budding romance. It was hitting a little too close to home.

Before Layla could speak the chimes above the diner door rang out softly announcing Natalie's arrival. She came in shaking off the snow and unraveling her scarf. Looking over to her right she saw the couples and frowned. Layla rolled her eyes and Evangeline gave her an 'I told you so' look.

Christian had enough and wasn't going to deal with Evangeline's judgment mixed with Natalie's nastiness. Grabbing Layla's hand he pulled her from the table. "How about we go somewhere else…"

"I'd love too" she said smiling weakly.

Natalie saw them approaching the door and stepped in front of them "Where are you two going?" she asked her voice cracking as she looked down at their hands clasped together.

"That's none of your concern Natalie, move…." Christian said dryly.  
"Can I talk to you?" She asked looking in Christian face. Layla let go of his hand and looked at him questioningly. Christian reached for Layla's hand again holding it tight them pulled her out the door pushing past Natalie without another word.

Evangeline eased into the booth with her foot carefully and looked up into John's eyes. She saw his disappointment in her and she sighed "I didn't mean to upset her, but you can't honestly think that a relationship between those two will do anything but destroy her."

"You pushed to hard sweetie, you could have handled it better that's all." he said reaching across the table and touching her hand.

Evangeline softened only to see Natalie making a beeline for their table. John saw the irritated expression cross Evangeline's face and turned in the booth to see Natalie descend on them.

"My don't we look cozy" she said tossing her red limp hair.

"What is it Natalie?" John asked looking up at her wishing she would disappear. 

"Can I talk to you?" Natalie said pouting

"No…can't you see we're having breakfast!" Evangeline snapped surprising both John and Natalie. She was always very tolerant of them two and their supposed connection. Today she just wasn't in the mood. 

Blowing out a frustrated breath she looked away. This thing with Layla and Christian was bad; she saw nothing but heartache for her sister and wanted to spare her that. She knew all to well what divided loyalties could cost you in the game of love.

"Natalie, could you please leave. Now is not the time." John said seeing the pain on Evangeline's face. Natalie stared at John for a long moment then glanced at Evangeline. "John we were friends first, and foremost. I'd like to maintain that."

He looked up at her and Evangeline turned to gauge his reaction. If he even went there she was leaving. She wouldn't play this poor little Natalie routine with him any longer. The ball was in his court.

He stared at Natalie for a long moment then sighed "I don't want to hurt your feelings, I actually think you're a good kid at heart. But I can't lie or mislead you Natalie. This woman here is my choice, yesterday, today and tomorrow. Right now I'm doing everything to prove myself worthy of her love and she's been gracious enough to give me that shot."

Natalie eyes watered "So that means you can't be my friend?"  
"At this time in your life and mine, I don't think it would be wise. You need to find out who you are and what you want. I'm doing that as well. You lost your husband twice and that has to be hard. Work on you and healing."

"John…." She said making a move to touch him but stopping herself.  
John looked over to Evangeline "Now if you don't mind, I'd like to buy my lady some breakfast."

Natalie bit down on her lip. She glanced at Evangeline who smiled reaching across the table to touch John's hand and her heart broke. Without much resistance she turned and fled the diner, complete disillusioned over not having either Christian or John to lean on.

Todd almost collided with his niece as she fled. He frowned stepping back to see her racing into the parking lot. Not really caring about her pain further he turned going inside the swinging door.

Coming up the sidewalk he could see Evangeline and John in the diner and felt relieved that he had found her. First stop he made was to her place and when she wasn't there he tried John's. Without much luck he was heading to the police station when he saw her Mercedes parked outside of the diner, from the street.

"Thank you John" Evangeline said touching his face.

"I love you Evangeline" he said kissing the inside of her palm.

Todd walked straight over "Are you okay?"

Evangeline looked up confused "Todd?"

"Why didn't you call me!" he snapped

"I…"

"My god Van, why didn't you tell me that freak came after you!" he yelled.

John stood from the booth, he moved into Todd's face making him take two steps back. "The question is Manning how the hell did you know?"

"Get out of my face!" he snipped moving to the left so he could stare questioningly at her "What happened?"

Evangeline frowned "How did you know? Is it on the news?"

"No I got a letter informing of the visit"  
"What kind of letter?" John said looking him up and down. Evangeline eyes grew wide and she finally spoke "She contacted you?"

Todd pushed past John and took a seat in the booth. "First you, did she hurt you?" 

"No, she didn't John got there and he saved me" she said looking over to John who stood at the table with his arms folded. Todd looked up at him "Well I'm glad he was there, I don't know what I would do if something happened to you" he said sincerely.

Evangeline smiled sweetly at him "I'm fine Todd, honestly" she said squeezing his hand with her good one. Todd sighed lifting her hand to his lips and kissing it. He would love her always.

John sucked in his breath "About this note" 

"I'll handle it!" Todd said dismissively waiving John off.

Evangeline frowned "The hell you will!" 

"Manning….you won't be going rodeo on this. You barely missed the needle in your arm the first go round."

"Oh and I'm supposed to believe you and your band of merry men will scour the forest and find that wicked witch?" he sneered.

John glared at him. "Say what you want, but if you step out of line again I'll personally throw your ass under the jail"

"Hey guys enough. You two have to work together on this." she said shaking her head. Margaret's threat was real and she feared for Todd and Blair with her running loose. He was right she should have called. Looking up at John she blushed recalling the reason why she didn't.

Todd saw the look she gave John and in spite of himself felt a pang of jealousy. Ironically he had decided to let go any notion of romance between them, but he just couldn't stand the thought of McBain hurting her again. "I will handle it" he mumbled letting go of her hand and sitting up straight.

"NO! No Todd dammit! Let John help. You have Blair and the kids to think of. Margaret has robbed you of so much, and she also has your child out there. You can't continue like this. You have to let the police handle it."

"Fine…" he said letting go of her hand and reaching inside of his jacket to pull out letter. Passing it over to John he smiled "Let's see you do your work Columbo! Tell us what does this mean?"

John snatched the letter and opened it. He read it then turned it over. "Where's the rest?"  
"What rest?" Todd said shrugging  
"The letter said it included instructions. Where are they?"  
"Don't know, she's crazy. My guess is she forgot to include them"

Evangeline huffed in frustration causing Todd to look back over at her sheepishly "Quit with the jokes! The woman has two guns and is dangerous. Tell John what you know!"

Todd frowned "She has two guns?"  
"She took my gun off me…." John said  
"Oh boy! How the hell did you let that happen?" he asked looking at John disgusted.  
"Spill it now Manning or I'm hauling your ass in!"

Todd looked at Evangeline who nodded confirming that he should reveal it. Reaching back in his pocket he pulled out the directions to where Margaret wanted to meet passing them over to John.

John stared at the paper and then looked back at him. "You think you were followed?"  
"Probably, that psycho broad is everywhere! Why can't you and your clown patrol catch her already!" he hissed.

John shook his head ignoring the barb. "I need to make a call" he said walking away with the note and flipping open his cell phone.

Todd redirected his attention to Evangeline reaching for her hand again "What happened last night?"

"She showed up, talking about getting you back and John got there in time to scare her off. Honestly I'm okay. He saved my life."

"This is my fault, I should have never left you" Todd said squeezing her hand

Evangeline shook her head "Listen to me, its time you stop this."

"Stop what?"  
"Projecting…you have a lot going on and mostly the root of your pain is your family and that baby out there in the hands of a mad woman"

Todd dropped his head "This isn't about them"  
"It will always be about them. Not only is your family in pieces now, you have a baby out there somewhere Todd. We will get Margaret but after that then what? What's your plan?"

Sitting back in the booth he stared at Evangeline silently and she understood. He was hiding behind her so he didn't have to think of what to do about that baby and his family. "Todd, sweetie you and I have been through a lot and what we share is strong. I feel it. It's deeper than romantic love and stronger than infatuation. I need you to heal and that healing means facing the present so you can have the future you were supposed to have. Stop running and deal with the pain of Blair's betrayal. You will need her at your side when we capture Margaret and become a family again."

Before he could speak John came back to the booth. He slid in with Evangeline and she scooted over to make room. Putting his arm around her he looked at Todd for a long moment. "It's all set. If she's watching we need to give her a show"

"Show?"   
John nodded "Tonight you meet her at the docks."  
Evangeline looked over to John "Are you serious?"  
John leaned over and kissed her forehead "We'll be ready for Margaret. It's time we ended this once and for all."

Paige stepping out of the shower hearing incessant pounding on her door, slipping on a robe over her wet body she hurried out of the bathroom. "Who is it?"  
"Open up or I'll shoot my way in!" Margaret hissed  
Paige froze hearing Margaret's voice. Her heart pounded in her chest with fear. She couldn't call the police and have Bo learn of her lies and secrets. But she couldn't let that creature back into her suite.

"OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!" Margaret yelled turning the doorknob. Paige ran to the kitchen to get her gun slipping it in her pocket.

Going to the door she undid the lock freeing the chain before pulling it open. Within seconds she was face to face with madness. Stepping back Margaret came in closing her door. Paige knew this time of day that her floor in the hotel was relatively empty since most of the tenants were at work. At least she hoped so, she didn't want to have to deal with Margaret and then explain why she was in her place.

"What do you want?"

"Get dressed! We don't have much time, my Todd will be coming to me tonight and I will need your help to make sure all goes well!" 

Nora rose from the sofa. Her atrophied limbs from the coma were now moving stiffly. She no longer required a wheel chair or a nurse. Walking with a cane she slowly made her way to the door. Opening it Matthew immediately gave her waist a warm hug 

"Mom!"

"Hey sweetie" she said running her hands through his hair looking up at Bo.

Bo smiled supportively "You said to bring him over after school"

"Thanks come in" she said moving out of the way. Mathew took off for the stairs to go back to his room, he's missed for an eternity.

Bo walked in with his hands in his pockets and Nora immediately picked up on his mood. She followed him into her sunken living room. "Is something wrong?"

Turning Bo shook his head "You have enough going on, I don't want to unload on you"

"Bo, hey it's me. Is it Asa? I heard he was in the hospital. How is he?"

"Pa's the same and yes part of me is worried sick over him." Bo said sadly going to the nearest chair and taking a seat.

Nora moving slowly went to the sofa and sat down "What's the other part?"

"The other part of me feels that Paige is in trouble and I'm powerless to help her."

Evangeline sat on her sofa watching John pace her living room talking in his cell phone. She had a bad feeling about him and Todd both going up against that crazy woman. She was too crafty. This could all be some kind of set up. John finished his call and looked at her. "The officer is outside your door….I have to go now"  
"John…"  
He smiled at her calling after him. Going to her he knelt in front of her touching her thighs "Its okay, this will all be over soon. I promise"

Biting down on her bottom lip she stared into his blue eyes. Lifting her hand she touched the side of his face gently fighting back the urge to cry "I just found you again, I wouldn't survive it if I lost you."

"You won't"

"I also need you to take care of Todd. I know you don't like him, but he's important to me. Promise you won't let him do anything reckless."

"I promise" he said parting her legs and moving in between them while on his knees. Kissing the crease between her breast then the inside of her neck he slid his arms around her waist. "I'm coming straight back to you when this is done" he moaned

She put her arms around his shoulders tilting her head back to the loving kisses and moaning softly. "I'll be here waiting on you"

Paige got out of the car keeping her eyes trained on Margaret. She still had the gun on her and was grateful Margaret didn't check her pockets before they left. The crazy woman could smell fear on Paige and was more than confident she had her under her control. Slipping her hand into her coat pocket she fingered the cold steel of the gun. Her life was over now, whatever was about to go down would mean her further involvement.

She wanted a future with Bo, but Spencer even from the grave made sure that wouldn't happen. Margaret pointed out a secured spot for her trap and went through the details. Paige couldn't hear her all she heard was the pounding of her heart in her ears.

As Margaret turned her back on her grinning at the way she would be reunited with Todd, Paige reached in pulling out her gun leveling it at the back of her tormentors head.

"Todd and the police won't suspect a thing!" Margaret said excitedly turning around smiling to see the barrel of the gun in her face. Her eyes grew wide with shock and before she could speak Paige fired.

Margaret's head snapped back as she was lifted off her feet tossed to her back. It seemed her body fell back in slow motion. And instinctively Paige kept firing until she emptied the gun into Mad Mags lifeless body.

Crying she kept pulling the trigger hearing the gun click emptily. "Oh god…oh god!" she said stepping back shaking her head. "What have I done?"

Rushing to her car she jumped in, she would go home and pack then get the hell out of Llanview. Crying she sped off the docks realizing that the hands she used for years to heal were the ones that actually became instruments to kill. She would never forgive herself for what she did, but she felt a sense of relief that it was finally over.

Looking up in the rearview mirror at her eyes brimmed with tears she shook her head. "Its all over, goodbye Bo" she said sadly racing up the expressway, accepting the fact that she would never see him again.

Todd walked into the police station. He'd already gone home to check on Blair and the kids, making sure they were okay. Promising Blair he would return tonight and they would really talk. Seeing John surrounded by officers he walked over "Can we get this over with!" he said anxious to find Margaret. Evangeline was right, he had a child out there that needed him. He would need Blair's help in raising his baby.

John looked up "We need to put a vest on you and then we're set. I just sent out the first wave of officers to secure the streets surrounding the docks.

Todd rolled his eyes "She'll see them?"  
"We know what we're doing. You will be wired so we can communicate, but of course you're going solo"

"Fine! I just want this done and over with." He said storming off.

John watched him go with the detective to get fitted for his vest. "Me too…." He mumbled. He would put Margaret behind bars and then close the door to Todd Manning. The man was poison and he didn't like his obsessive behavior with Evangeline.

Back to Index

Chapter 16: Lost Souls 

Nora looked up at Bo with a confused look on her face, "What do you mean Paige is in trouble?"  
"I just can't put my finger on it Nora. Ever sense the plane went down with Evangeline and Todd she's been acting weird."  
Nora smiled politely and sat back against her couch. The walk from the door and back was extremely tiring. She was just now getting her bearings back slowly but surely. Letting out slow deep breathes to steady her heart beat she looked over at Bo, "Could you explain more what you mean?" she asked softly.

"She's just been so anxious lately and really all over the place. She isn't like the woman I used to know."  
"People change Bo." She said softly.  
"Yeah but not that much Nora, it's like I don't even know her any more."  
"I get that." Nora said nodding her head, "You think it has something to do with Todd?"  
"Todd, Spencer, Margaret, someone." Bo shook his head and pushed up from chair and paced back and forth in front of Nora. "There is something there Nora, she's hiding something and you know how I hate when people hide things from me."

Nora looked up and ran her hand slowly through her short cropped hair. "I know Bo. What is it I can do for you?"  
He turned and smiled at her, his face tired and haggard from the day. He stood with his hands on his hips then sat next to Nora, "How are you?"  
Nora laughed and shook her head, "I'm fine Bo, we were talking about you not me."  
"I know that, I just want to make sure you are doing well. I never felt so helpless in my life watching you in that coma for all those months." He said softly looking down at the ground.

Nora reached over and touched Bo's hands, "I'm back Bo. You, Matthew and Evangeline brought me back."  
Bo squeezed her hands lightly, "I… I mean we needed you back, this life wouldn't be the same without you in it. You know that right?"  
"I do now…" Nora smiled and pulled her hands free setting them in her lap. "Now can we get back to you and Paige?"  
"Why does it matter? She obviously doesn't trust me like you do. I mean if you were having problems you would have come to me right?"  
"I don't want to compare myself with Paige we are two completely different people Bo."  
"I know that, but you would have said something right?" Bo shifted and looked at Nora. Her eyes wide with truth and honesty.

"I did my fair share of hiding things Bo, and it hurt all of us, Matthew included in that. Whatever Paige is hiding it can't be as bad what I did to you and our family."  
"I've forgiven you for that Nora."  
"That may be true, but I don't know if I've forgive myself."  
"I want you too, I need you too. Matthew needs you too as well…"  
"And you?" she asked softly.  
"Yeah me as well, no matter what we go through we will always be connected." He said smiling.  
"Yeah , I know. Matthew."  
Bo shook his head, "Not just Matthew…." Bo stood and walked around the living room,  
"I just wish she would open up and tell me what's going on like you do."  
"You think it's bad?"  
"Possibly…All I know is that with Margaret out on the loose after Todd the whole LPD are on alert and it's costing the city money we can't afford right now. .I just want this done and over with. We've dealt with Margaret Cochran for two years now, and she needs to be caught. She's inflicted so much pain on Todd and his family."

"I still can't believe that Spencer Truman was behind it all." Nora shook her head in disbelief.  
"That's why I think. There is some kind of link there and I'll be damned if I don't figure it out. Thanks for listening to me ramble Nora."  
She smiled softly, "Any time Bo…"  
"I'm going to go check on Matthew, he's been up there for a while."  
"He's missed his room."  
"He's missed his mom!" He said climbing the stairs.

John stood outside of Evangeline's apartment his hand resting on the door jam as he waited for her to answer. The door opened and he looked up into her dark brown eyes and a smile spread across her lips as he leaned forward. "Hi…" he said softly brushing his lips across hers and then slowly letting his tongue run over her soft, plump lips.

"That's some welcome." She said softly taking a step backwards, "I didn't expect you so soon."  
John slid off his jacket and closed the door and then led Evangeline to the couch. He pulled her down in between his legs and kicked his shoes off. Resting his chin on her shoulder Evangeline sunk back into his arms, "What's wrong John?" she asked softly, feeling his hands run up and down her stomach and over her thighs.

John let out a deep sigh and turned his head burying it in her neck, "Margaret's dead." He said softly.  
Evangeline's mouth fell open and her heart beat slowed down, "What?" she asked stunned.  
"When we arrived at the docks where Todd was supposed to meet her, we found her body instead of her."  
"What!"  
"Yeah, she was shot over and over again hun…" he said holding her close.  
"My, God! How is Todd? I should call him." Evangeline rose to go to the phone and felt John pull her back to the couch. "What?"

"Stay with me." He said softly letting his eyes close as his lips kissed her neck over and over again.  
Evangeline tried to turn her head and look at her man, "What's going on? If she's dead why aren't you at the station taking care of things?"  
"I'm where I'm supposed to be."   
"John, it's your job. Go back there and take care of things. I'll be here when you get back." She said softly.  
John pulled back and looked at her as Evangeline turned around, "You trying to get rid of me?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.  
"NO!" she said laughing softly, "I just don't want you to think that I need you here at every moment of every day."  
"That wont happen hun, but I do want to be here…" he said motioning between them, "I need to be here with you. That okay?"

Evangeline smiled and leaned in to kiss John softly. He ran his hands through her hair bringing her face closer to his, "I love you…" he said softly pulling back. "Have I told you that today?"  
"Umm… I think about twenty times today." She said smiling.  
John rested his forehead against hers and inhaled her scent, "It was so surreal to see her there ya know?"  
"I'm sure, what did Todd say?"  
"He just stared at her body. He wouldn't leave till the corner got there to pronounce her dead, even then he didn't believe it."  
Evangeline sat back on the other side of the couch putting her feet into John's lap, "He'll be fine."  
"He said he was going to go talk to Blair."  
"That's good."  
"He said you made him do it."  
Evangeline nodded and played with the hem of her shirt, "He belongs with Blair and the kids. They love him too much for him not to be there."  
"You know him well huh?" John questioned as he played with her toes.

Evangeline shook her foot to get his attention, "He will always be apart of my life okay? Can you handle that?"  
"I can handle it, doesn't mean I'm going to like it. Manning is bad news."  
Evangeline held up her hand, "Please let's not. This is one topic we are going to have to agree to disagree on okay. There isn't anything you can say to make me feel differently about Todd, John…" She said staring at him.  
"Nothing I can do to change your mind huh?" he asked wiggling her big toe back and forth.  
"Nope nothing, he saved my life and I will always be grateful to him for that. The same with you, John. You saved my life and I will always be grateful to you for that."  
"There's a difference between Manning and I…" he said smiling at her.  
"What's that?" She asked with mock confusion.

John moved her feet over and hovered over her, "I love you with all of my heart." He whispered.  
"Say it again."  
"What?"  
"That you love me."  
"I love you." He said rubbing his nose against hers, "I love you…" he whispered again before capture her lips in a soft kiss.

Evangeline raised her arms around John's neck bringing him down on top of her. She felt him grind against her and smiled at the thought that he still couldn't keep his hands off of her after all this time. Pulling his shirt up Evangeline drew her nails up and down his back eliciting soft moans from John's lips as he kissed the inside of her neck.

"Vangie!" Layla said coming into the apartment her head down as she searched her purse for her cell phone.  
"Damn it Layla!" She snapped looking up at her as John fell on top of Evangeline laughing softly into the pillows.  
"Oh, sorry!" she said slowly closing the door behind her. "You two should really get a room." She said throwing her purse on the desk.  
"I'm in my apartment, what are you doing here?" Evangeline questioned as she slid from up under John.  
"I was just wondering if you wanted to go get some food at Rodi's with me. I have the night off and I miss my sister." Layla said putting her hand on her hip.  
Evangeline looked over at John and he shook his head no, "Don't listen to him!" Layla said staring at John with a devious grin.  
"Hey!" John said leaning over to stare at Layla, "I haven't had any time with her."  
"Neither have I!" Layla whined.

John reached up and pulled Evangeline closer to his chest kissing her side and running his hands along her hips, "Stay with me." He whined.  
Evangeline laughed and ran her hands through his hair, "Why don't we all go."  
"The three of us! I don't think so."  
"Call Cris!" John said quickly as he sat up behind Evangeline. Evangeline turned and shook her head at John, "What are you doing."  
"What?" John said innocently. "I want to hang out with you and so does your sister, and apparently we make her uncomfortable."  
"More than uncomfortable." Layla said from across the room. Evangeline rolled her eyes and turned back to John, "Are you sure about this, I mean it's Cristian. Natalie's Cristian."  
"Not any more from the looks of what we saw this morning. He's all about your sister now."

Layla stared at the two of them as she crossed and uncrossed her legs, "Listen to the man. I spent the day with Cris, he's great."  
"I know Cris is great… but for you." Evangeline said shaking her head.  
"Let me have fun Vangie… Tell her John!" Layla said pouting.  
"Let her have fun Vangie." John said laughing as he stood up.  
Evangeline rolled her eyes and reached her hands out to John to pull her to her feet, "You two are going to be the death of me."  
"That's because you love us so!" Layla said walking over and kissing Evangeline on the cheek, "So does that mean he can come?"  
"Why do I sound like mom! Yes, he can come." Evangeline hobbled into the bedroom leaving John and Layla in the living room.

"Thanks John." She said touching his hand lightly.  
John stared at her, "You want my place?"  
"What!"  
"My apartment, you want it?"  
"Where are you going to stay?"   
John looked around the corner toward Evangeline's bed room, "With her…"  
"Ha! Yeah right. My sister would never go for that."  
"I can be very persuasive." He said smiling and rocking back and forth on his heels.  
"It won't work…" Layla shook her head and smiled at him, "Think again McBain."

Todd watched as the elevator doors opened to the penthouse floors. He took a step out and let out a slow sigh, "Mr. Manning!" The guard said shocked to see him.  
He nodded at the security guard and forced a smile, "Go home…" he said slowly as he pushed open the front door.

As the door swung open Todd took a step in and turned to see the guard leave. He closed the door in his face and walked further into the penthouse. Dropping his keys on the desk he ran a hand over his face. Margaret's face flashed in his mind and he shook it clear. He rested his hands on the edge of the desk and stared at the wall. He could see her lifeless body, her eyes dead and cold staring back at him.

Her hair was black but soaked in her blood as it pooled around her body. When he knelt down next to her he stared at her eyes making sure they didn't blink. He even imagined that they did and jumped back a little. As the coroner came around he watched as they loaded her body onto the gurney and then into the hurse.

He had to literally be dragged from the crime scene by one of LPD's finest because he stood rooted in the spot staring at the blood stain her body had created. He watched as John worked the crime scene still shocked that she was dead and he didn't do it. He wanted revenge on her for everything that she put his family through. He lost his wife and kids because of that woman, oh god his kid…. He squeezed his hands on the back of the chair at the thought that his son was out there without him.

"Todd…" Blair said coming down the stairs surprised to see him.  
Todd looked over at Blair and then back at the desk, "Yeah…"  
"What are you doing here!" she said staring at him, pulling her robe over her body Blair walked closer to Todd wanting to reach out and touch him.

Todd turned to face her, his face as white as a ghost his hair disheveled from constantly running his hands through it. He stared at her, his eyes sad, missing the woman that made him complete. Rushing to her he pulled her closer and rested his head against hers, "Tell me you love me." He said softly.  
"I love you Todd." Blair held him close running her hand up and down his back and neck. "I'm sorry for everything." She said kissing the inside of his neck.  
"I know… I know…" he said softly holding her closer as he fingered the bottom edges of her hair.

Blair pulled back and wiped at her eyes, "What are you doing here?"  
"Margaret is dead." He said softly running his hands down her arms and then back up again.  
"What!" she asked shocked, "How, when?"  
"At the docks tonight… She was shot." He said softly.

Blair took a step back and stared at Todd with her hand over her mouth, "You…" She said shaking her head.  
"No, no…" he said walking to her, "I didn't do it!"  
"Good…." Blair said blowing out a breath and running her hands through her hair.  
"You think I would kill her?"  
"I wouldn't blame you Todd, not at all! After everything she did to you, to us to the kids she deserves everything she got. I would have done it myself."  
"Did you…" he asked looking at her with a sideways glance.  
"What!" she snapped.  
"Did you kill Margaret?"  
"No!" she said hurt by his accusation. Todd smiled as he walked up to her, "Why are you here Todd?"  
"I had a talk with Evangeline." He said sliding his hands into his pockets.  
"And what did the, oh mighty Evangeline Williamson have to say this time!" she snipped.

Todd smiled and shook his head, "You'll never understand where she comes from, just like she'll never understand where you come from. She's the reason why I'm still alive Blair, she believed in me and I will always love her for that."  
"Well good for you and her! What does this have to do with me?"  
"She made me see the truth." He said sliding closer to her.  
"What's that?"  
"That you and I are locked together, no matter how much I try to fight it and no matter what I do to you, we always come back to each other."  
"I told you that."  
"I needed an outside opinion on the matter." He said leaning down to kiss her lips.

Blair held up her hand, "I want you to know something."  
"What?" he whispered as he brushed her hair from around her neck.  
"What I did to you, is awful. I should have never doubted you Todd. You are my life, you gave me Starr and Jack and I will always love you for just that. I want you to know that I love you with everything inside of me."  
Todd stared at her in the eyes and smiled as they sparkled with tears, "I love you too Blair." He said softly before kissing her lips.

She wrapped her arms around his neck molding her body into his as he lowered her back onto the couch. Giggling as she felt his hands part her robe and slide up her shirt she let out a soft sigh, "I love you Manning."  
He peered down at her brushing her hair from her face, "I love you too…" he said softly capturing her lips again in a searing kiss.

The foursome walked into Rodi's and all at the same time they spotted Natalie. She threw money on the bar and stood up. Walking past them she said nothing and pushed past them.

Layla blew out a breath as she watched Natalie leave, and hopefully for good. John held on tightly to Evangeline's hand as they found a table. He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them gently. Evangeline smiled and watched as Cris pulled out Layla's chair for her.

"Thanks for getting me out of the house." She whispered against John's ear as he held her chair out for her.  
"My pleasure, just promise me that we'll finish what we started earlier."  
"Deal…"  
"Pinky swear?" He asked holding out his pinky.  
Evangeline grinned and linked her pinky with his, "Pinky swear." She whispered. John smiled a sly smile and leaned down to kiss her and seal the deal. Evangeline let her head fall back as her hair swept across her back and his hand slid around her neck to hold it in place. John lost himself in her kiss, the feel of her hair in his hands, the feel of her fingers caressing his cheek and chin. Her tongue swirled slowly against his as John devoured her in front of all to see, not caring who was around.

As he pulled back breathing heavily he watched her lips still searching for his her eyes closed lost in her own world of John. He kissed her a few more times before taking a seat next to her and pulling her closer. "Wow… that was some show!" Layla said laughing as her cheeks blushed.  
"Sorry." Evangeline wiped at John's lips and snuggled close to him.  
"Yeah sure you are." Cris said with a wink.  
"How's boxing Cris!" Evangeline said changing the subject quickly.  
"Good, Layla came to the gym with me this afternoon."  
"Really?" John asked shocked.  
"Yeah I've got a mean right cross isn't that right Vangie!" Layla said laughing.  
"Yeah, I'm sure you do!" Evangeline smiled as Layla faked punches she learned with Cris.  
"You're teaching her how to box?" John said raising an eyebrow.  
"Yeah, so?"  
"I'm telling you now, that you better be careful. These Williamson's are tough girls, and I know from experience."  
"Huh?" Both Cris and Layla asked.

John smiled at Evangeline and then back over at Cris and Layla, "Let's just say that I've had my fair share of encounters with this one." He said poking Evangeline.  
"Hey now! You're the one that kidney punched me."  
"I did?"  
"You did! On your birthday remember." She said staring at him in disbelief.  
"Ahh My birthday." He said nodding his head.  
"What?" Evangeline looked at him hurt, "What's wrong."  
"Nothing…" John shook his head and turned back to Cris and Layla who had grown quite.  
Evangeline pulled at his arm, "What's going on!" she said stunned.  
"Nothing, trust me it is nothing." He said rubbing her leg under the table and squeezing it. Evangeline looked at him sadly then turned back to her sister and Cris, "What are you guys going to have for dinner?" she asked trying to distract herself from what John was hiding from her.

Bo came down the stairs and looked over at Nora doing small leg lifts to help build up her muscle strength. Bo came around and knelt in front of her and took her leg in his hand. He raised them slowly up and down and Nora watched him silently.

He stopped working on her left leg and moved to the right, "This is supposed to help me walk again with out that." She said pointing to the cane that sat next to her.  
Bo looked over at it and then back at Nora, "Is it helping?"  
"Yeah I guess so. How's Matthew?"  
"He's glad to be home with his mom."  
"I'm so glad he's back here, you did good."  
Bo nodded his head as he lowered her leg and moved back to her other leg.

"You don't have to do this."  
"It's the least I can do. I feel some what responsible for the whole thing."  
"Don't…" Nora said as she shook her head.  
"Too late…" Bo felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled it out as he lowered her leg to the ground, "Commissioner." He said rising from the floor. "What!... Okay I'll be right there." Bo snapped the phone shut and blew out a heated breath.

"What was that about?"  
"Margaret Cochran." He said grabbing his coat.  
Nora watched as Bo slipped on his coat and walked back over to her. "What about her?"  
"She's dead."  
"What!"  
"She's dead, John and Todd got a lead and John ran with it and when they went to meet her they found her dead." He leaned over and kissed her on the lips without realizing it.

Pulling back Bo stared down at her, "Sorry."  
Nora touched her lips and shook her head, "It's okay… you go handle your work. I'll tell Matthew that you had to run off."  
"Thanks." He replied softly as he opened the front door. Bo turned to Nora and nodded his head as she smiled at him. She touched her lips again as the door closed and shook her head laughing to herself.

"I give up!" Evangeline said passing her cue stick to John.  
"Oh hun, don't give up! You and Layla were doing so good." John said laughing.  
Evangeline rolled her eyes, as she walked back to their table near the pool table, "You know you two cheated!" Layla said passing Cris her cue.  
"How so!" Cris said laughing.  
"You gave me the cripple!" Layla said staring at him.  
"Hey now! I'm sitting right here."  
"Shhhh…" Layla put her finger over her lips and then winked at her sister, "I say you give us a handicap because of Van's handicap."

John looked over at Cris and Cris looked at John they both turned to face Layla and Evangeline, "No!" the said in unison.  
"You suck at this!" Evangeline said rolling her eyes.  
"What! You're the lawyer in the family."  
"Yeah so you should have let me pled my own case." She whispered as Layla sat down across from her.  
"Hey, I tried." Layla drank Cris's beer as he and John played pool.

"You like him?" Evangeline asked as she took a fry.  
"You know the answer to that question." Layla said setting Cris' beer back on the table.  
"Just making sure." Evangeline said shooting her sister a wink.  
Layla turned to watch as Cris and John acting like the best of friends playing pool, "Is that weird or what?"  
"Yeah it is, just as weird as you and John being all buddy buddy."  
"What?"  
"I saw the way you two ganged up on me Lay…" Evangeline said resting her arm on the table. Layla shook her head and crossed her arms at Evangeline's comment, "When did you guys get so close."

Layla looked back and John and watched as he winked at her sister. "He really loves you Van." She said turning back to face her sister.  
"I know that Layla."  
"Do you?"  
Evangeline narrowed her brow, "Yes of course."  
"He was heartbroken when everyone thought you were dead, but at the same time he was there for me."  
"You?"  
"Yeah me… I thought I lost my only sister and he was there to see me through it. He promised me that he wouldn't rest until he brought you back to us."  
Evangeline lowered her eyes to the table and then looked back up at her sister, "I'm glad he was there for you."  
"He was and I saw how much he really loves you through it all. I'm glad you finally gave him a second chance."  
"Me too."

Evangeline sat back in the chair and smiled over at John. She watched as he laid the cue stick on the table and patted Cris on the back. He walked over smiling at Evangeline and then extend his hand to her, "What?"  
He took her hand and pulled her to his chest, "Dance with me." He said softly rubbing his hands along her back.  
"Here!" she asked shocked.  
"Yeah, where else?" He said smiling as he pulled her to his chest.

The music changed as they moved slowly out into the middle of the floor. As he started to move her around John's cell phone buzzed in his pocket. "Get it…" she said softly.  
"Nope, you and me tonight." John said pressing his body against hers as he twirled her around the floor.  
The phone went off again and Evangeline stopped the dance and pulled back from him, "Answer the phone John."  
"Nope…" He pulled her back and twirled her around so that her back was to his chest. John slid his hands down her waist and over her hips as he held her close. Evangeline let her eyes close feeling his lips brush against the softness of her flesh. A few moments later his cell phone buzzed again and Evangeline reached in and pulled out his cell phone.

"McBain." She said winking at him.  
"Evangeline!" Michael asked shocked.  
"Hey Michael, yeah it's me."  
"What are you doing with John's phone?"  
"I had to answer it because he wouldn't." Evangeline said poking John in the chest as she smiled at him. John rolled his eyes at hearing her say Michael's name. He took the phone from her and Evangeline hobbled back to the table.

"What is it Michael, this better be good."  
"It's Natalie." He said softly.  
"What about her?" he asked annoyed as he walked back over to the table.  
"She's here John, at the hospital. She's been in an accident." He said sadly.  
"What!"  
"Yeah it doesn't look good John. You should come to the hospital."  
John stared at Evangeline with wide eyes. "What is it?" She asked softly. John moved the phone from his mouth and looked at everyone at the table, "Natalie's been in an accident." He said sadly.  
"Oh my god what!" Evangeline said shocked.  
"Yeah, Michael says it doesn't look good." John said shaking his head.

Evangeline stood up and grabbed her coat and slipped it on, "Tell Michael we'll be right there." Evangeline said staring at him.  
"What, are you sure?"  
"Yes John! Let's go…" She shoved John's coat to him and watched as Cris and Layla hurried out of Rodi's.  
"We're on our way." John said quickly and snapped his phone shut.

Michael hung up the phone and walked over to Clint and Vicki. He slid his hands into his pockets as they stared at him with hope in their eyes. "How is she!" Vicki said quickly as she rose from her seat.

Michael looked at the nurse who came out with Natalie's chart and handed it to him. "She's holding her own right now, but we need to get her into surgery. Can you tell me what happened again?"  
Clint shook his head and looked at Vicki, "All I heard from downstairs was glass shattering and then loud tumbling and then a thud." She said crying softly.  
"So she fell down the stairs?"  
"That' what I think… no one else was in the house but the three of us."

Michael nodded as he flipped through her chart. "Was she drinking?"  
"I don't know…" Clint said shaking his head.  
"I think she might have been, I'm not really sure though. Why do you ask?"  
"Her blood work, her alcohol contend is way over the legal limit."  
"What does that matter, you need to fix my daughter!" Vicki yelled.

Clint held her tightly in his arms as she cried against his chest, "Make her better!" Vicki yelled as the tears streamed down her face.  
"What can we do?" Clint asked as he rocked Vicki in his arms.  
"Donate blood. She has a rare blood type, we'll need all the AB positive we can get."  
"What!" Vicki asked shocked.  
"Yeah her blood type AB positive, it's rare. We need all the blood we can get for her."  
"Well that's not possible, she can't be AB…" Clint said shaking his head.  
"Why not?" Michael closed the chart and slid it under his arm as he stared at the two of them confused.

"I'm O negative." Clint said, "Vicki's A positive. There is no way that Natalie can be AB positive."  
"It's what it says…" Michael said opening the chart back up and showing it to Vicki and Clint.  
"But that means…." Vicki said shaking her head.  
"She's not a Buchanan." Clint said softly, "She's not my daughter."

Back to Index

Chapter 17: Lost Souls 

2 months later

Evangeline walked down the hall of the Buchanan Towers looking at the folder in her hand. She had some very good news, and she couldn't wait to be the one to deliver it. It had been 2 months since everything in Llanview change. The death of Margaret Cochran was the catalyst that sent ripple effects through the lives of the residents of Llanview.

After her body was recovered Bo arrived to the station to begin the arduous task of finding her killer. Stumbling upon a bracelet he gave Paige for Valentines Day sent his mind into a tailspin. If he hadn't had it engraved with his and her initials he would still to this day believe it wasn't hers. But with the bracelet and subsequent disappearing act of his beloved girlfriend brought the truth came crashing down upon him.

Turns out the good doctor had rid the town of the greatest menace they'd seen since the Killing Club Killer. Three weeks later she was found in New Mexico when in her desperation she used one of her credit cards to rent a motel room. She thought she would make it across the border before it was traced. She didn't know that Bo had the entire nation looking for her.

After her arrest she confessed and explained how Spencer Truman ruined her life. Bo was devastated; the only solace he found was the comfort of Nora's arms. Nora was at his side during Paige's arraignment and when she was sentenced to life without parole. It was Nora who had to put the shattered pieces of her beloved's heart back together.

After loosing her mind over Daniel Colson's betrayal she understood fully what that kind of pain could do to someone. Evangeline was happy that they were working their way back together. She and Nora laughed continuously over their brooding men and the work it took to keep their guys happy. Her friend was back and all was right in the world.

Looking up at the conference room she tossed her hair over her shoulder and smiled. She couldn't wait to be the bearer of good news.

Coming inside she saw Todd, Blaire seated waiting patiently. Blair was holding baby TJ in her arms. After Paige's confession she indicated that Margaret had mentioned a name in regards to where TJ was in case she needed Paige to pick up the baby if her little trap went awry. 

It took Rex Balsam three weeks to find the baby and pry the infant from an older Spanish woman's arms. The lady had grown extremely attached to the child.

Evangeline believed Rex would have found the baby sooner if he wasn't still distraught over what happened to Natalie. Her fall down the stairs due to a drunken binge left her paralyzed from the neck down.

It was a tragic sight to see her move around the room with the mouth piece of her electric wheelchair and struggle to speak clearly. Evangeline paid her respects with John but Natalie cried at the sight of them. She was now pretty much a recluse. She hoped in someway she found peace. Especially since everyone else has.

"I have great news you two" Evangeline said dropping the folder on the conference table. Blair looked up at her smiling. "They granted it!"

"The courts are sending over the papers in the morning! You two are the official guardians of that beautiful baby boy!"

Todd smiled widely pulling his wife into his arms crushing his son. "Todd, careful" Blair said smiling.

"I'm sorry.." he chuckled and leaned over kissing his forehead. He looked over at Evangeline. "This is all because of you."

Evangeline standing in her classic gray suit with her hair framing her face clasped her hands in front of her. "No Todd, you were the one that pulled us all through, and now you can finally be at peace with your family."

Todd rose form his seat and walked around the conference table. Coming to stand in front of her he took both her hands in his. "I gave up one day, I thought that my life wasn't worth the ink on my death warrant. It was you and only you that saw me as a human being worthy of being redeemed. That believed in me in spite of everyone around you telling you different. It was you that made me finally open my eyes to what's important."

Evangeline smiled "What's important?"  
Todd looked over to Blair and his son then at Evangeline "Family, friends, loyalty, faith, hope, unwavering support and unconditional love. That's what you taught me Evangeline, that's what changed me. I will never forget the way you saved my life." he said pulling her into his arms.

Evangeline hugged him tightly and he kissed her cheek. Blair watched as a mild pang of jealousy rippled through her. How could it not. Evangeline had done the thing that she wished she had. She would always feel guilty for siding with a man that tried to kill the man she loved. She would have to live with that.

Todd kissed his friends forehead letting her go. "We'll be in touch"  
"I'll send you my bill" Evangeline chuckled.  
Blair stood up reaching for the baby bag. "Evangeline I want to thank you as well. You saved my family and helped us be whole."

Evangeline walked over and touched the babies little face "Take care TJ, you are one special kid" she said kissing his forehead. "You too Blair, good luck to you both." She said kissing her cheek.

Blair nodded walking over to Todd who took her head. Todd opened the door and held it for her. He looked back at Evangeline with part of his bang over his eyes. "You finally won that spelling bee…"

Evangeline chuckled "You know what I think I did"

Todd winked and mouthed the words I LOVE YOU…

Evangeline winked back mouthing the words I LOVE YOU TWO…

She watched him leave and sighed. The day was over and her work was done. It was days like this she knew why she was who she was. Picking up the folder she walked out of the conference room and turned off the lights.

She spoke to Layla and she and John were to meet her and Christian at the Palace tonight. Christian had just been crowned the Light Weight Champion of the World from his last fight in Atlantic City. They all wanted to celebrate. Evangeline was extremely proud of how his life was turning around and how he and her sister seemed to be in love.

When Natalie was diagnosed with paralysis Christian was at her side. His heart ached for the woman that he loved for so long. Natalie feeling sorry for herself had him forcibly removed.

Layla thought that Christian would fight to be the one to take care of her. It was then he explained his true intentions. He would always love Natalie, but Christian the painter and husband that existed in that love was gone. He just wanted to make sure she was okay so he could move on.

It was Layla that he wanted to start anew with. He spent the past two months making a believer out of her sister and they were falling deeply in love.

Turning her door knob to enter her office she stopped surprised. John sat on the edge of her desk popping the cork on the champagne bottle. The bubbly fountain overflowed and Evangeline laughed as it spilled all over her carpet. 

"You're going to clean that up!" she said smiling pointing at the stain with the folder in her hand.

"It's a celebration baby come on in"

Evangeline frowned closing the door "How did you know that I got TJ awarded to the Manning's?" she said smiling.

John raised his eyebrow "You did? That's great news!"

"That's not what you meant?"  
John shook his head rising from the desk he grabbed a champagne glass and poured her some. "It's our anniversary"

"Anniversary?" she said confused accepting the glass

John went back and fixed his. Walking over to her he clinked his glass against hers. "2 months to this date I told you I loved you for the second time and you finally believed me"

"Really?"  
"Really"  
"Well you do recall what happened after that little confession, the second one that is?" She asked sipping her champagne and looking over her glass batting her long lashes at him.

John smiled "I do…" he said slipping his arm around her waist and pulling her to him kissing her under the neck. Evangeline sighed tilting her head back "John we can't we have dinner plans."

"I cancelled them, they said they understood. It being our anniversary and all." he moaned trailing his kissing to her ear and sticking his tongue inside.

Evangeline smiled "You're so naughty…"

"Let me show you " he said seductively and she giggled. An office interlude between them was long overdue and the aftermath had her once again shaking her head. She always had the hardest time explaining the destruction and replacement of the office furniture, that their passion left in its wake. Lying naked in his arms on her sofa she looked back into his eyes.

"Is this as good as it get?" she asked  
John kissed her lips softly "We've only just begun…"

The End of Fan Sweeps! Hope you ladies enjoyed it. Spoilers say that VAN will be blind in May sweeps! You know me and B will be right back on track writing the story the way it should be told! All in celebration of the wonderful pairing portrayed so brilliantly by Michael Easton and Renee Elise Goldsberry!

JOVAN PHEONIX 2006 Yeah Baby!


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